“I’m home.”
As he stepped into the officetel, which now felt familiar, the unlit interior greeted Ben.
It seemed empty and desolate at a glance, but Ben knew the familiar man was asleep in the innermost bedroom.
He quietly turned on the hallway’s indirect lighting and moved to the dining room.
Recently, going out alone had been rare, and even when he did, Haimar greeting him at the door was an everyday occurrence.
Perhaps because of this, the same space felt foreign in the complete silence, as if no one were there.
They say you don’t notice when someone is present, but you certainly do when they are gone.
Originally, Ben should have been used to being alone and considered the chilling silence, which no one welcomed, a given.
It was a strange and surprising turn of events.
When he first started cohabiting with the man who brought him this unfamiliar feeling—as a Guide and an Esper—he never dreamed their relationship would change this much.
Indeed, you never know what life will bring.
Although they were suddenly living together as a couple now, no one would say it was bad to be with the person you loved.
Ben smiled faintly, dropped the bags full of groceries onto the dining table, and quickly put the beer and a few fresh items that needed refrigeration into the fridge.
He had planned to buy just a few things, but as he grabbed one item after another, he ended up buying things he hadn’t even thought of.
The price he paid was fingers much more frozen than before.
Moreover, he had struggled quite a bit because of the sleet on the way back, so he shook off the water droplets that had melted onto his clothes.
“Hmm…?”
Just as he was about to take off his jacket and head to the dressing room to change, he sensed a presence from the bedroom.
Ben changed his destination to the bedroom and opened the door slightly.
Haimar, who looked like he had just woken up, was half-raised in bed, pushing back his disheveled hair.
Even without the main lights on, the skin of his naked torso seemed to gleam as if sprinkled with gold dust.
His slightly tilted neck looked particularly shiny, making him appear even more sensual.
Whether Ben was simply infatuated or not, it was clear that a languid beast was firmly coiled in the bed.
It was lazily flicking its tail, trying to chase away the lingering sleep that displeased it.
A rare, faint smile touched Ben’s lips as Haimar’s sleepy eyes moved toward him.
“I’m sorry. Did I wake you?”
He felt a bit guilty, wondering if he had made too much noise on his return.
Even though Haimar was temporarily sleeping more, he was an Esper with heightened senses, and Ben should have been more careful.
“No. I was about to get up.”
Ben approached, turned on the bedside lamp, and absentmindedly reached out to fix Haimar’s messy hair.
He stopped short, realizing his hand was freezing cold.
Ignoring the pause, Haimar leaned his cheek against the halted hand and familiarly pressed his lips into Ben’s palm.
“Oh, my hand is extremely cold right now.”
The warmth of Haimar’s hot lips spread across his ice-cold palm.
It had become a habit for Haimar to lean his face and rub his lips against Ben’s hand whenever Ben reached out.
But now, Ben’s hand was red and rough, as if it had been soaked in ice water for a long time, and he felt self-conscious.
“It’s perfect. It wakes me up.”
As much as he wanted to pull his hand away, saying he still shouldn’t, Haimar was not someone who could be deterred by a simple action or words.
Since Haimar said he was fine, Ben, who was the only one feeling awkward, awkwardly bent his waist.
He decided he should take a short rest, change into comfortable clothes, and then start preparing dinner.
“Come here.”
“I’m really cold, I tell you!”
Haimar, not understanding why Ben hadn’t sat on the bed, pulled the arm he was holding.
Ben hesitated slightly at the gesture, which was nearly pulling him into a full embrace, but he eventually followed the soft force, settling onto Haimar’s lap, wrapping his arms around his neck, and sinking into his embrace.
The body heat transferring through the fabric was warm.
He thought it was a good idea not to resist, and Haimar’s touch was welcome.
Usually, Ben had the higher body temperature, so having Haimar, who had a higher temperature than him, felt new today.
He rested his body against the arm wrapped around his waist and the solid torso.
Despite Ben being cold, Haimar pressed and lifted his lips against his ear or the exposed part of his neck outside the shirt, as if trying to warm him up.
Since they decided to date, such small physical touches had significantly increased. It was a noticeable change compared to before.
To be honest, since it was Ben’s first time dating a man, the actively received affection sometimes made him feel a little shy.
In his relationships with women, he was always the one who had to be dominant, whether in bed or elsewhere, so being on the receiving end was new.
But it felt quite good.
When he saw the man who had always been self-centered and arrogant share pieces of his world with Ben, and when he confirmed the affection through every touch, he felt an inexpressible sense of fulfillment.
Thanks to this, Ben himself learned to respond naturally, no longer stiffly like a robot, when receiving affection.
“But listen… Everything is nice, but my clothes are damp from the snow…”
Such lingering awkwardness still showed because his inherent nature was different from Haimar’s.
“I don’t care.”
Haimar already knew it wasn’t just Ben’s hands that were cold, but his whole body.
With his sensitive sense of smell, the scent of the chilly winter mingled heavily with Ben’s own scent.
Moreover, Ben’s face was flushed red at the nose and earlobes from the cold, and partially melted snowflakes clung to his hair.
The body he held tightly in his arms wasn’t his usual, almost-hot temperature, which, surprisingly, became a new concern for Haimar.
Furthermore, when he buried his lips or pressed his skin into the areas where Ben’s scent was strongest to melt the chill, Ben would try to reciprocate by hugging his neck a little tighter.
This effort was endearing. It quenched the frustrating thirst deep in his core, and at the same time, it filled him with a mysterious and peculiar satisfaction that could not be achieved through Guiding alone.
“What about dinner?”
“I haven’t eaten. I was going to eat with you. Is pizza okay? A franchise we often ate at in Hermannsen just opened nearby, and I was happy to see it, so I bought some.”
Ben lifted his face from Haimar’s shoulder and chattered in a pleasant voice, mentioning that he had also put beer in the fridge and recounted the story of Elgran giving them a bottle of wine in a casual manner.
Haimar gently pressed his slightly parted lips and cupped Ben’s still-cold cheek.
Ben awkwardly rubbed his cheek against Haimar’s, attempting to imitate him.
Ben’s body only returned to its original temperature after Haimar adjusted his embrace and raised the surrounding temperature by a few degrees.
It was an effort he wouldn’t have had to make if Ben had changed his clothes right after arriving, but Haimar didn’t mind.
Instead, he was thinking, ‘If I had gone with him, he wouldn’t have come back frozen like this.’
Considering his original nature, which didn’t care if someone froze to death or went to hell, this was a truly dramatic change when it came to Ben.
His train of thought soon inevitably drifted to his increased sleep.
Haimar, who was displeased with this unwelcome fact, asked:
“But why didn’t you wake me up?”
“I told you yesterday, didn’t I? I felt bad about waking you up for nothing.”
Lately, Haimar had been caught in a swamp of sleep, as if compensating for the sleepless days he had endured until now.
Central said it was a necessary process for his body to adapt after the control device was removed.
However, the inability to control the phenomenon of his mind being immersed in sleep provided him with a new kind of frustration, comparable to the time he couldn’t use his abilities freely.
The feeling of his mind being trapped in sleep was unpleasant, but since it was a symptom that would gradually improve, he could, by a hundred degrees of concession, accept it.
However, there was one thing he absolutely could not tolerate.
“Wake me up. Not having you in front of me when I open my eyes is the most disgusting feeling.”
The inability to immediately recognize the absence of his lover and Guide.
The fact that he had been sleeping like a log without even noticing her absence was a horrific, pioneering step into a new world of irritation for him.
It was a good thing Ben had appeared right away; otherwise, the vague sense of ‘anxiety’ he felt upon waking up would have instantly inflated.
It was what Espers deeply connected with their Guides were always said to have.
It was ridiculous, but Haimar didn’t deny that he was feeling such an emotion.
To be precise, he stopped questioning it.
Experiencing new emotions while being with Ben was no longer a source of confusion.
As a result, Haimar had learned what ‘anxiety’ was—a feeling he had never needed to know or had a reason to know until now.
Detecting her absence had somehow become a given.
Therefore, his increased sleep was far from welcome.
Still, the process of his body adapting seemed to be working, as his ability to regulate his powers had significantly increased.
The voices of hearts that had been relentlessly and maddeningly filtering through, like the uncontrollable volume of a broken stereo, could now be filtered to some extent.
If he removed the last remaining control device, full control no longer seemed like an unattainable goal.
