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Non-returnable-Esper chapter 12- 99% of My Suffering Is Because of You

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Before Seo Jaewon could even react, Joo Youngha wrapped a long arm around his neck and shoulder.

With zero shame, he leaned his full weight on him, causing Jaewon to pitch forward slightly.

“Hey—Joo Youngha…”

Jaewon looked up to scold him—but found Youngha staring straight at Sara.

It was rare for him to pay anyone else any attention.

Sara didn’t look particularly moved, though.

If anything, her face had twisted into a bulldog-like scowl.

She looked pretty offended.

Maybe even hurt?

“Not interested in Seo Jaewon the person, okay? I just want my Guiding.”

Youngha looked at Jaewon with a strangely wounded expression.

Like a puppy being mistreated.

“Jaewon…”

Don’t look at me like I’m supposed to fix this for you!

“Hey! I told you to look people in the eye when you talk to them! Seo Jaewon, teach your brat some manners!”

Why is everyone yelling at me…?

Seo Jaewon let out a long, deep sigh.

One that came from the bottom of his soul.


The dungeon had appeared in an unexpected place—an underground parking garage in the middle of the city.

More precisely, it was in the basement of the Apgujeong ‘The Mirae’ department store.

It was a newly opened mall around this time of year.

Jaewon vaguely remembered the buzz about its indoor sky garden or whatever it was.

Naturally, it was always packed.

Always long lines…

“Wow, if we come in like this, we don’t even have to wait for parking,” Sara muttered as she unloaded heavy gear from the van.

The place was completely empty—it was long past closing time.

Only Dungeon Management Bureau vehicles filled the lot.

It had been a while since a dungeon showed up in such a busy area.

Even with all the years Jaewon had spent as an Esper, this kind of thing was rare.

Not impossible, though.

The mechanism behind dungeon appearances still wasn’t fully understood even 15 years later.

But the general theory was that they were more likely to appear in densely populated areas.

People criticized the regional imbalance, but in Korea, it was the perfect excuse to assign stronger Espers to the capital.

‘Was there ever a dungeon here? No… I guess I wouldn’t have known.’

If a dungeon had appeared in such a famous department store, it would’ve made the news.

But Jaewon had no memory of it.

That made sense—around this time, he was half-detained and being interrogated about the Corridor Dungeon incident.

A dungeon where not only several high-ranking Espers died—but Joo Youngha himself was killed.

Jaewon, being the sole survivor, had become both the witness and the suspect.

If that hadn’t happened, he probably would’ve been dispatched to this site instead.

Thinking about how this shouldn’t have happened originally gave him a strange feeling.

Of course, he never imagined he’d be coming here as a Guide.

‘I should take this as a good thing.’

It was a second chance.

After what happened, how many times had he wished he could turn back time?

Becoming a Guide… well, he could get used to that.

Seo Jaewon shook off his thoughts and focused on the present.

Guide prep was a lot simpler than for Espers, so he had extra time on his hands—enough to start playing team leader a bit earlier than usual.

Managing Joo Youngha was basically the main task of being Team 4’s leader.

“Zip it up all the way, Youngha.”

“Being human—really human—starts with the little rules, you know…”

As he helped Joo Youngha into his bulletproof vest, Seo Jaewon murmured something to himself, quiet enough that no one could hear.

“This is such a pain…”

Despite the complaint, Joo Youngha stood obediently in place, eyes darting around as he let himself be dressed.

He was ridiculously tall, yet the way he stood so still like a child getting ready for kindergarten was almost laughable.

“Alright, give me your hand.”

“Hand.”

Joo Youngha grinned and plopped his hand into Seo Jaewon’s.

Smack.

Seo Jaewon slapped the back of it.

“Gloves. Put on your gloves.”

“They’re uncomfortable…”

Seo Jaewon grabbed Youngha’s fidgety fingers and forced them into a pair of tactical gloves.

‘Come to think of it, this is what our old field uniforms used to look like…’

Their current gear resembled military fatigues, navy blue with bright orange accents.

In the future Seo Jaewon came from—ten years ahead—these had long since been replaced with streamlined jumpsuits. It brought a wave of nostalgia.

Some features had been upgraded, sure, but for Espers, the difference wasn’t that noticeable.

Fabric was fabric, and there were limits to how much tech you could pack in before it started messing with mobility.

Bulletproof, stab-proof—it didn’t matter when you were up against something truly strong.

It’d just get shredded anyway.

In the end, Espers mostly relied on their own durability.

Or they dodged well enough not to get hit at all.

Some didn’t even bother with field gear.

Jaewon always suited up properly, but he didn’t put much faith in it.

To him, it was just clothing—something to keep his skin from being exposed, and a vest to stop the outfit from tearing.

Joo Youngha wasn’t any different.

He was one of the strongest Espers around, and sometimes showed up to operations in just jeans and a T-shirt.

Nagging never worked.

He didn’t even pretend to listen.

In his past life, Jaewon had eventually given up trying.

‘But not this time. Not again.’

Even Joo Youngha could die if he got stabbed.

He knew that—because he’d watched it happen.

Granted, that had been an unusual situation.

Normally, Youngha always kept himself wrapped in a telekinetic barrier.

But who knew what went through that guy’s head—or didn’t?

There was no guarantee it wouldn’t happen again.

Maybe the vest would help next time.

Maybe it wouldn’t.

Either way, Seo Jaewon was determined to do whatever he could to keep him alive.

“Alright. You’re set.”

There was a strange comfort in running through a routine, even if it was someone else’s body he was prepping.

“Youngha, your knives?”

“No idea.”

Suppressing a sigh, Jaewon patted him down.

“…Two in the boots, one at the waist, one inside the vest. Okay.”

Knives—more was always better.

They didn’t run out like bullets, they were versatile, and depending on the user’s ability, they could be devastating.

The standard recommendation was to carry four, like Joo Youngha had now.

But depending on personal style or power type, some Espers carried even more.

The equipment team never questioned it—they’d hand out as many as you wanted.

But for Guides…

Jaewon ran his fingers over the knife at his own waist.

A small one—just enough to cut rope.

And they’d only given him one.

‘What the hell? Even a Guide should have at least something to defend themselves with, right?’

He lowered his voice instinctively, as if someone might overhear.

“Give me one of yours and go get a replacement.”

“Sure.”

Youngha agreed easily, smiling down at Jaewon.

But Jaewon could tell right away—

‘That’s the face of someone who is never going to get a replacement.’

Those innocent eyes gave away his total lack of concern for knives.

He’d forget he even handed it over in five minutes.

“…Never mind. Saul, can I borrow one of yours?”

The idea of Joo Youngha dying just because he didn’t have one extra knife was too horrifying.

Hwi Saul, on the other hand, never forgot his gear.

“You sure? Guides don’t really need one…”

It must’ve felt like some kind of moral dilemma for a model soldier like him.

Still, he hesitated only briefly before handing one over.

It was a decent-sized blade, and he even subtly shielded the exchange with his body so no one would notice.

Thoughtful to the end.

“You never know. A Guide might need to use a weapon too.”

“Isn’t it the Esper’s job to make sure that never happens?”

Jaewon remembered Saul saying something like that before.

‘Man, what a pretentious little kid I must’ve been…’

He chuckled awkwardly.

“Well, I’m… not exactly a typical Guide. I’ve had combat training, and I’m not assigned to a team as a permanent Guide, so I need to be able to handle myself a bit.”

“You don’t have to say that. We’re just glad you decided to stay on our team.”

“As your team’s Guide?”

“No, we figured you’d be Youngha’s exclusive.”

Hwi Saul said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Youngha’s always short on Guiding, and he hates everyone else. You’re the only one he’s okay with.”

“I wouldn’t say he likes me exactly…”

Jaewon grimaced without realizing it.

At best, Youngha didn’t hate him as much as everyone else.

That was all.

Just then, Joo Youngha leaned in, casually resting his weight on Jaewon’s shoulder.

His champagne-colored eyes rolled toward him, clear and unguarded.

Even in the underground parking garage, his cheeks glowed faintly.

“Jaewon, can we do some Guiding now—”

“I told you, after the mission. Your necklace is still yellow, remember?”

Yellow meant he was in perfect condition—at least, by Joo Youngha standards.

It had been orange before he drained Jaewon the night before.

Watching silently, Hwi Saul spoke again, more firmly this time.

“He really does only like you, Jaewon.”

No, no way… There was no way that was true.

Still, Youngha was leaning on him more heavily now, almost trying to wrap their arms together.

He didn’t say anything or try to guide sneakily, though, which—by Joo Youngha standards—was downright respectful.

Jaewon decided to let it slide.

Apparently satisfied with just that, Youngha quieted down and nuzzled his head lightly against Jaewon’s shoulder.

Jaewon resolutely ignored the warmth in those smiling eyes.

‘Don’t kid yourself. Looking cute like some puppy won’t get you anything. I’m just letting you stay there if you behave.’

“Gross, Youngha… You and that clinginess and ridiculous good luck of yours.”

Hwi Sara, watching them from behind, muttered with a disgusted sigh.

Joo Youngha, unsurprisingly, didn’t react.

“Maybe I should look for an exclusive Guide too. What do you think about Min Yoomin?”

“Min Yoomin?”

“Our team’s Guide.”

She gestured toward a slim man with bleached yellow hair chatting nearby.

Min Yoomin, who’d recently joined as their team’s new Guide.

According to his file, this was only his second team assignment.

Before that, he’d worked as a Center Guide—no permanent team, traveling to wherever he was needed.

Most Guides stayed at the Center.

Field Guides were a more niche role with fewer volunteers.

Jaewon had run into him occasionally in his previous life.

“Do you think that’ll work?”

Jaewon asked, baffled.

“I mean, what kind of Guide would— Never mind. It’s probably impossible anyway. They hardly ever approve exclusive assignments anymore.”

Trying to seduce a Guide doesn’t automatically mean you can make them your exclusive partner.

Obviously.

But Espers often harbored such dreams.

There were even cases where people actually hit it off in the field and ended up in unofficial guiding relationships…

“Why? Joo Youngha did it too!”

“It’s not something that just happens like that!”

Hwi Saul jumped in.

“Yeah. Sara, you’re being a little too greedy. Reflect on that.”

“What? You repent, Oppa. Repent for being such a fossil. And repent for being ugly too!”

“Sara, you haven’t gone to church in over ten years.”

“And you go to temples on Buddha’s Birthday!”

Seo Jaewon quietly took a step back.

Once those two started bickering, they could go on for minutes nonstop—it was always a pain.

It was chaos.

Urgent work kept coming in, his teammates were scattered and distracted, and Joo Youngha wouldn’t listen to a word…

“Well, at least he’s alive…”

He wondered if his standards had dropped too low since regressing, but still—Joo Youngha, while clingy and annoying, didn’t show any signs of wanting to kill anyone.

That alone counted as… average, at least.

Thinking he might find some peace elsewhere, Seo Jaewon glanced toward Min Yoomin.

But Min Yoomin was already looking his way—and, inexplicably, winked and waved.

‘Was he always like that…?’

Before he could even finish the thought, a scream pierced the air.

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