* * *
I clenched my fist tightly, then released it.
I could feel the sharp sting of my nails digging into my palm.
Even so, the turmoil in my heart refused to settle.
It felt as though I wasn’t firmly standing on the ground, but floating somewhere between stability and uncertainty.
I had forgotten my name in Korea, forgotten my exact age.
But I could still remember living as myself, so it was fine.
That’s why, even when I discovered that I might truly be Sean, I managed to endure it.
But ever since I woke up after four years of sleep, something had started to crack.
There was a slight sense of unease, but everything I experienced in my dreams was too vivid—so much so that it took me a long time to realize they were dreams.
And when I finally woke up from that long slumber, I had to face another truth: the me in Korea was already dead.
‘Memories I believed to be real… weren’t real at all.’
From that moment, my shaken heart became the stage for new dreams.
Dreams where I became something—someone—that wasn’t myself.
There was definitely a sense of incongruity.
But while I couldn’t remember the dreams after waking up, the sensations remained too vividly…
‘Ah, forget it.’
Thinking about it any further would drive me insane.
I forcibly cut off my thoughts and got out of bed, sitting at the table.
As I leaned back against the chair and closed my eyes, I sensed Mila entering the room.
The rich aroma of soup filled the air, and suddenly, I felt hungry.
It was almost funny how I could still get hungry even in the middle of such serious thoughts.
“Mila, thank you.”
“It’s nothing. Please eat, Young Master.”
I took a sip of water before bringing a spoonful of soup to my mouth.
As the warmth spread through my empty stomach, I finally felt a little more alive.
I slowly alternated between the soup and bread.
Before I knew it, my plate was empty.
“You finished it all, Young Master. Well done.”
Getting praised for simply finishing a meal at my age—it was embarrassing, but not exactly unpleasant.
Still, feeling a bit self-conscious, I wiped my nose and let out a small chuckle.
“It’s just food. Nothing special.”
“But I’m still grateful. That you eat, that you smile, that you talk—all of it.”
I looked at Mila carefully.
There were no tears in her eyes.
But sadness didn’t always need tears to be visible.
The slight furrow of her brows, the way she smiled despite it—it all carried a deep sorrow and concern.
“…I’m sorry.”
“Huh? No, Young Master. There’s nothing for you to apologize for.”
“Still… I’m sorry.”
That was all I could say.
It wasn’t just about today.
It was… everything.
I was grateful to her for caring about me as I was, even when I couldn’t bring myself to be fully honest with her.
And yet, I felt guilty for it.
“Young Master…”
After a moment of hesitation, I reached out both hands in front of me.
It was an action I hadn’t taken since I was a child, so it felt painfully awkward.
Anxiousness curled at my toes.
‘Will she accept it? She might just laugh and say I’m too old to act like a child…’
But my worries were unfounded.
Without the slightest hesitation, Mila pulled me into a warm embrace.
The moment I felt her comforting warmth, tears welled up in my eyes, and the unease I had been holding onto melted all at once.
“Mila…”
“Oh, my dear Young Master. What’s making you so worried and so apologetic?”
She gently stroked my hair, and I hugged her even tighter.
“I’m sorry. Just… everything… all of it…”
The truth was, I wasn’t sure of anything anymore.
Everything felt overwhelming, and I didn’t know what was happening or where things were headed.
Would I really be able to do this?
Could I break Raizen’s curse?
And if I failed…
‘Would they resent me for it?’
“It’s okay, Young Master. You’re not alone.”
“….”
“Of course, just because we’re together doesn’t mean everything will be solved. Everyone carries burdens they alone must bear. But still…”
“….”
“It’s okay, even if you don’t do everything perfectly. I don’t, either.”
“But…”
Could I really say this out loud?
The words wouldn’t come.
But Mila didn’t rush me.
She simply patted my back gently, as if to say she was ready to listen whenever I was ready to speak.
“…What if I fail?”
“….”
“What if I can’t lift my brother’s curse?”
“….”
“What if the day comes when my power no longer works on him?”
It was too heavy, too terrifying.
The ancient gods told me nothing, and I had no idea what Raizen was thinking.
But more than anything… the real problem was me.
‘Why? Why did I have to fall for Raizen?’
If not for this cursed emotion, I wouldn’t be shackled by my own feelings.
I could have just done what was expected of me, carried out my role, and disappeared without a trace…
“…Hic.”
I couldn’t hold back anymore.
The tears I had been desperately suppressing spilled over, along with all the emotions I had hidden away.
“Mila, I’m scared.”
I had nowhere else to return to.
This world had become my real world.
If I failed, if I had to watch this world fall apart with my own eyes…
“Young Master.”
Mila called my name softly.
“Remember this. Even if something goes wrong, it’s not solely your fault.”
“….”
“I don’t believe in a world where everything falls apart because of one person’s mistake. So…”
Her voice wavered, thick with emotion.
“It’s okay. Everything will be okay.”
I buried myself in Mila’s embrace and cried for a long time.
∗ ∗ ∗
The next day, no one asked why my eyes were swollen.
The only thing the duke and duchess asked me was:
‘Sei, are you feeling alright?’
‘Are you sure you’re not unwell?’
They only worried about my health. That was all.
Seeing their concern, I smiled as brightly as I could.
I reassured them that I was truly fine, and that if anything felt off in the future, I would speak up right away.
My words seemed to ease some of their worries.
In the morning, I went sightseeing in Ether with them.
My first impression of the city was that it was a sophisticated and academic place, but after exploring, I realized it wasn’t all so serious.
One part of the commercial district had shops selling magical artifacts and potions made by students from the Royal Academy, and some of the items were utterly ridiculous.
[Professor’s Mind-Reading Glasses — Become the perfect servant to your professor!]
[Frog Transformation Potion — Use this when you need to escape unnoticed!]
[Sleep-Repelling Potion — You will never sleep! (Warning: This effect may last until your death!)]
How was this even legal?
My image of the Royal Academy had taken a serious—no, a massive—hit.
“Oh, Sei, how about visiting the academy before the conference?”
During lunch, the duchess made an unexpected suggestion.
“Huh? But I thought outsiders were only allowed during the conference?”
That was why I had prepared an invisibility necklace to sneak in…
“If you want, we can arrange for you to visit beforehand.”
The Duchess placed something on the table. It was a thin golden plaque, engraved with what looked like a phoenix.
“With this, you can enter the Academy as well as any building. You’ll have to show it at every entrance and log your visits, which is a bit of a hassle, but…”
So, basically, a free pass?
I reached for it as if drawn to it.
“Um, if possible, I’d like to take a tour before the conference!”
“Of course. Then shall we head out right after the meal?”
A sudden thought crossed my mind.
“Yes!”
Wealth and status truly are the best!
∗ ∗ ∗
To be honest, when I imagined the Royal Academy, I thought of something like a vast university campus.
But the moment I stepped inside, I realized just how limited my imagination had been.
‘This is basically… an entire city of its own!’
Enormous buildings stretched endlessly, and the streets were anything but narrow.
Without a map or proper knowledge of the layout, it would be far too easy to get lost.
And not a single corner was left without impeccable landscaping.
“Sei, once you’re done with your tour, come back to the Priscilla Hall. If you’re unsure, just ask one of the stationed guards for directions to the conference venue.”
The Duchess pointed to a specific building on the Royal Academy’s map as she spoke.
“Yes! The conference starts at three o’clock, right?”
“That’s right.”
“Hm, but… are you sure it’s okay to let him go alone?”
At the Duke of Pantheon’s concerned words, the Duchess chuckled as if she had expected this.
“Servants aren’t allowed to accompany students inside the Academy. If he walks around with Mila, it will only draw more attention.”
“Still…”
He didn’t seem entirely comfortable with the idea of letting me go alone.
Well, I guess it made sense. This was the first time I’d be leaving the ducal estate on my own.
‘At some point, I got so used to it that I didn’t even find it inconvenient anymore.’
It just meant they had always been looking out for me.
Smiling brightly at the Duke of Pantheon, I reassured him.
“I’ll be careful. I’ll be an adult soon anyway!”
Of course, the real reason I wanted to go alone was that it would make it easier to find the Divine Beast’s egg.
“Alright. Stay safe. If anything happens, just show them your pass.”
…Just what kind of authority does this pass hold, exactly?
“Well then, I’ll be off!”
Pushing aside my lingering curiosity, I started walking.
* * *
