Farewell to the hero! chapter 61

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“…….”

My lips, which had started to move, closed again.

Still groggy, it took me a moment to grasp the situation.

I was sure I had been writing a letter just a moment ago.

Did I fall asleep midway?

And now this person…

As soon as I recognized the owner of those vivid green eyes, my eyes widened.

I bolted upright, lifting my torso from the desk.

Among all the people I knew, only one person had eyes that piercing shade of green.

“……Kaindel?”

“Took you long enough to recognize me.”

I called his name in a hoarse voice.

His response came back immediately, as if he had been waiting for it.

The hand that had been running down my shoulder and back slowly withdrew.

Kaindel touched the imprint on my cheek with a soft smile, his grin widening further.

I stared at him blankly as he smoothed my hair after fixing my cheek.

The sight before me felt utterly unreal.

Why was Kaindel here, when he wasn’t supposed to return until two days after the banquet?

Neither the butler nor Sehir had mentioned any changes to his schedule.

His unexpected appearance threw me off completely.

…The letter.

As I gazed at him, my thoughts raced back to the letter I had been writing to Kaindel before I dozed off.

His sudden appearance had momentarily driven it from my mind.

“Did you eat well while I was away?”

“Ah, yes. I didn’t skip any meals.”

“Good.”

Taking advantage of Kaindel’s focused attention, I discreetly searched for the letter.

My fingers groped along the table, but I couldn’t find it.

The smooth surface of the table was all I felt.

Where could it be?

Realizing the letter was missing, my heart started pounding wildly.

I felt as though I had been caught red-handed in the middle of the night.

I glanced at Kaindel to gauge his reaction, worried he might already know about the letter I had been planning with Sehir.

That would explain why he returned to the mansion early.

But Kaindel seemed oblivious.

He kept playing with my hair absentmindedly, looking so unconcerned that my anxiety eased a bit.

Even so, the missing letter kept nagging at me.

Kaindel continued to watch me silently before leaning down and kissing the top of my head. He didn’t pull away as he began to speak.

“Isa, there’s something I want to tell you.”

“Later.”

As his shadow loomed closer, I lowered my gaze.

That’s when I noticed the letter, overturned near the chair.

The moment I saw it, I bit my lower lip hard.

Relief washed over me.

Thank goodness.

It hadn’t been taken—just fallen.

“Let’s talk later, Kaindel.”

Keeping my gaze on him, I nudged the letter under the table with my foot.

To avoid raising his suspicion, I gestured towards the darkened window outside.

Finally, I managed to hide the letter under the table completely, and the tightness in my chest eased.

Letting out a quiet sigh of relief, I gently grasped his hands around my ears.

I forced a faint smile, contorting my face slightly.

It was the only way I could manage a smile in front of Kaindel.

“I’m just really tired right now.”

“Ah.”

Kaindel’s eyebrows furrowed briefly, then returned to normal.

Regaining his composure, he grinned mischievously.

Before I could question his expression, Kaindel lifted me up from my seated position.

“If you’re tired, you should go to bed.”

“What are you doing? Put me down.”

Instinctively, I clung to something as my view rose abruptly.

Kaindel nuzzled his head against my arm, which was wrapped around his neck, and chuckled like a content fox.

“Let me take you to bed, hmm? You’re tired, right? Isn’t it hard to move?”

“Not that much. Besides, it’s just next to us.”

“Exactly, just right next to us.”

I pointed to the bed not far from the table, and Kaindel nodded.

He understood that I could walk on my own but pretended not to.

I let out a soft laugh, watching his stubborn insistence on carrying me.

Had he had a dream too?

Is that why he was acting like this?

My mind, which I thought had settled while we were apart, became chaotic once again.

We weren’t supposed to be like this anymore.

I was sick of this relationship that kept circling back to the start.

Kaindel’s refusal to listen to my repeated requests to part ways, and my inability to push him away despite knowing what he had done at the temple—it all made me sick.

Did he kiss the princess during the engagement ceremony?

Did he hold his delicate waist and whisper promises of eternity?

Did he vow a lifetime with his before everyone, something he could never do with me?

As my thoughts spiraled, I imagined vivid scenarios.

It’s always easier to picture things you haven’t seen yourself.

Kaindel’s engagement with the princess was one such scenario.

To escape those haunting images, I pressed my forehead against his shoulder.

A sweet rose scent enveloped me.

It was a familiar scent, yet slightly different from the subtle floral fragrance Kaindel usually carried.

His scent was cool and matured, whereas this rose scent felt like rolling in a field of full-bloom roses.

It didn’t take much to deduce that the scent belonged to someone else.

Could it be the princess?

As I silently speculated, Kaindel reached the bed and gently set me down.

“What are you thinking about?”

“……Just that I’m really tired.”

“It is quite late.”

I answered Kaindel’s soft inquiry while brushing my hand over my mouth, suppressing a yawn that threatened to escape.

Sitting on the soft bed made my eyelids heavy again.

Even though I had slept at the table from day until night, exhaustion still weighed me down.

I must have been utterly worn out.

Rubbing my dry eyes, I lowered my hands and found Kaindel kneeling between my legs.

He clung tightly to my waist, his grip almost suffocating, and murmured:

“Don’t abandon me, Isa.”

For a moment, his eyes wavered, heavy and sinking.

They resembled the gaze of a child who had just let go of something precious, unable to stop the fragments slipping through his fingers, hopelessly trying to retrieve spilled water even while knowing it was futile.

Suddenly, I understood why Kaindel had returned earlier than expected.

I also knew what he had been wanting to say.

“So, wait. We have unfinished things to talk about, don’t we?”

A bitter smile almost escaped me.

“How could I ever abandon you?”

After all, I’m the one who’s already been abandoned.

I swallowed the words I almost added.

For a long time, in this unbalanced relationship where he held all the power, his rare moments of vulnerability amused me.

Sometimes, I even felt like crying out loud.

I wanted to lament my situation in a space where no one could see.

Does Kaindel realize?

That I’ve always acted like I had no pride?

Probably not.

That’s why he’s so desperate over the smallest change in me.

Did the engagement ceremony with the princess go well?

Watching him, exhausted as always, seeking comfort in my presence, I felt a wicked urge to ask.

I wondered what Kaindel’s reaction would be if he knew I was aware of everything.

Though, that would only stir trouble.

Shoving aside such thoughts, I patted his shoulder.

Kaindel, quick to catch the signal, moved to lie beside me.

Having received the answer he sought, he didn’t persist any further.

Once he turned off the light and settled down, I finally laid down too.

Lying flat, staring at the ceiling, I felt as though masterpieces were cascading down upon me.

It reminded me of a painting where a young man, caught stealing a golden apple from a goddess, was struck by a spear.

Anyway, tomorrow had finally come.

The day I would leave the capital.

The day I would finally part ways with Kaindel was just a day away.

Will Kaindel mourn my departure?

I quickly dismissed the thought with a chuckle.

Kaindel had never seemed sad because of me.

So, he probably never would.

Perhaps, never.

“Good night, Kaindel.”

Watching him cling to me as usual, I whispered quietly before trying to sleep.

The final words I offered Kaindel, not through letters but in person, were so mundane.

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