ACTSV chapter 39

* * *

“Yes, of course. I hate being sick too.”

Jingyeom was inwardly happy with Jinwoo’s permission and smiled brightly. It felt like a huge burden had been lifted.

After staring intently at Jinwoo’s eyes for a moment, Jingyeom cautiously opened his mouth.

“Can I… ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Will you answer?”

“Are you going to ask something I can’t answer?”

Jingyeom shook his head. Though it wasn’t that, it was a question that might make Jinwoo uncomfortable.

He had avoided this question earlier, but he felt he had to confirm it now, so he clenched his fists and asked with determination.

“How much debt do we have?”

Jinwoo knew he couldn’t hide it anymore and reluctantly told Jingyeom about their financial situation. Jingyeom’s mouth gaped at the larger-than-expected amount.

“Is it really that much?”

“Yes. So, hyung…”

“If we both work, we can pay it off faster. Just wait a bit longer. I’ll definitely pay it all off!”

The loan sharks’ debt was 200 million won. With an annual interest rate of 20%, the interest alone was a staggering amount.

Jinwoo had managed to reduce it to 200 million by consistently paying it off.

“What about our parents?”

Although he knew the past, he was unsure about the present. He asked to confirm if anything had changed and also wanted to hear it directly from Jinwoo.

It seemed like that would help him avoid making mistakes in the future.

Though Jinwoo showed a reluctance to talk about it, he told Jingyeom everything.

A runaway mother and a father who disappeared, leaving only debt. And Jinwoo, who had to take on all that debt.

‘So, that person was really our dad.’

Though he had blocked the number, there was one that had left the most missed calls and messages.

The messages never mentioned the word ‘dad,’ but they often asked for money and urged him to keep it a secret from Jinwoo.

It was clear to Jingyeom that the number belonged to their father.

While Jingyeom was cold to Jinwoo, he wasn’t like that with others. It seemed he didn’t want to show his low self-esteem to Jinwoo and often lashed out.

‘He was weak to that person.’

This was evident in the messages.

To their father, Jingyeom sent money, asked if he was eating well, and warmly checked on him. Despite the fact that they were in this situation because of the father’s loan sharks.

At first, they had taken out a bank loan for Jingyeom’s hospital bills.

But failing to repay on time led to a drop in credit, and eventually, they became credit delinquents.

Later, they resorted to loan sharks for living expenses and hospital bills.

But if they couldn’t repay the bank loan, they certainly couldn’t handle the loan sharks’ high interest. The interest-accruing debt snowballed.

The parents’ credit was problematic, but the children were unaffected. Yet, since Jingyeom couldn’t work, Jinwoo had to shoulder all the debt.

Initially, Jinwoo planned to repay the loan sharks first by taking out a loan, but as a young adult, getting a loan was not easy.

The loan amount was far too small to pay off the loan sharks. If they failed to repay, both would surely become credit delinquents, so Jinwoo decided against taking the loan.

Jinwoo had never shared his story, not even with Jingyeom.

Jingyeom planned to write down today’s events in his journal in detail, hoping that one day, the real Jingyeom would read it.

“At least we don’t have to worry about hospital bills. Director Tak turned out to be a better person than I thought.”

I used to criticize Tak Wonbeom for being obsessed with and controlling Jinwoo while reading “Grey”…

Objectively speaking, it was true that he helped relieve the heavy burden of hospital bills.

Of course, it wasn’t out of pure goodwill, but there’s no denying that it was a significant help.

I was proud of Jinwoo for enduring and persevering through all these situations so steadfastly.

Jingyeom knelt on his knees and gently pulled Jinwoo’s head toward his chest with his thin arms. His small hands carefully patted Jinwoo’s head.

“You’ve done well. Our Jinwoo, you’ve really done well.”

His hand, which was patting Jinwoo’s head, moved down to his broad back. He patted him rhythmically, as if putting a baby to sleep.

“I’m sorry for making you handle this alone. Baek Jingyeom was really immature, wasn’t he? I was bad, really.”

The concept of family holds a significant meaning in people’s lives. It was especially true for Jinwoo.

However, the bond between the brothers had long since decayed. It barely maintained its shape. While Baek Jinwoo tried hard to repair it, Baek Jingyeom neglected it.

It was a bond that wouldn’t be surprising if it broke at any moment.

Listening to Jingyeom’s heartbeat, which beat at a slightly slower but steady pace than the average heart rate, Jinwoo gradually found stability.

Jingyeom was the one crying and excited, but Jinwoo found himself puzzled as to why he was feeling this way, and then he let out a small laugh. He extended his arms and hugged Jingyeom’s waist.

His thin waist was wrapped in Jinwoo’s arms.

Because Jingyeom was kneeling, his slender ankles were fully exposed.

The situation of being held tightly in the arms of this thin and weak body, as if comforting him, didn’t seem real.

He worried whether someone was playing a cruel prank on him. They say giving and then taking back is the worst, and he was afraid that this happiness might be shattered.

It had been three weeks since Jingyeom lost his memory.

In that short time, they had cried, laughed, and found comfort in each other.

‘What if… his memory returns? What should I do then?’

Jinwoo often found himself thinking this while looking at the changed Jingyeom.

Even though Jinwoo knew that Jingyeom needed to regain his memory, he found himself hoping that Jingyeom wouldn’t.

If Jingyeom knew, he would be horrified, but Jinwoo’s selfish desires kept growing in a corner of his heart.

“Hyung.”

“Yes?”

Jinwoo slowly pulled his face away, tightening his grip. Jingyeom let go of his arms, allowing him to move away.

“Are you… starting to remember anything?”

“No. Is it frustrating that I can’t remember?”

“It’s not that…”

Jinwoo took a moment to catch his breath. He wondered if saying this was the right thing to do, worried about Jingyeom’s reaction, but his mouth moved faster than his thoughts.

“Do you… really want to regain your memory?”

Jinwoo’s deep brown eyes trembled slightly as he looked up.

It was always Jingyeom who had to look up at others. He was short, and most of the people he had met recently were tall.

Jinwoo, whom he saw the most, always had to be looked up to, whether he was standing or sitting. At least when Jinwoo slept on the floor, Jingyeom could look down at him.

Jingyeom playfully brushed Jinwoo’s short hair aside. His hand felt slightly damp, perhaps from the heat inside the house.

The house was stuffy, even at night, because they had turned off the air conditioner and opened the windows to get rid of the food smell.

The noisy sounds of summer insects, footsteps, laughter, and cars flowed into the house through the open doors and windows.

Amidst the noise, Jingyeom firmly answered.

“No.”

Even if Jinwoo would feel disappointed, Jingyeom couldn’t say that he wanted to regain his memory. He couldn’t remember, and he didn’t want to give Jinwoo false hope.

Contrary to Jingyeom’s worries, Jinwoo felt relieved inside.

If Jingyeom had said he wanted to regain his memory, could Jinwoo truly help him?

He probably would have tried. But deep down, he would have hoped that Jingyeom wouldn’t remember.

Jinwoo knew it was selfish, but he didn’t want to lose the happiness he was experiencing every day.

Jinwoo spoke sincerely again.

“…Then let’s not try to remember.”

“Yes, let’s do that.”

Jinwoo, knowing he was being selfish, spoke with a wish for Jingyeom not to remember. Jingyeom, feeling sorry, responded with the fact that he had no memory to regain.

The two shared their warmth without speaking further.

But soon, they had to part. It was too hot for Jingyeom to endure the tropical night without air conditioning, and his legs were hurting from kneeling.

In the end, Jingyeom sat down on the floor, bringing their tender moment to an end.

---

Jingyeom found a new part-time job. This time, it was at a private café.

Jinwoo also thought the café was a good idea and even encouraged him, saying he would get hired.

Naturally, he passed the interview.

Jingyeom applied for a part-time position, not full-time, working only from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. during the lunch peak hours.

The part-time job was for a month, targeting students on summer break.

Moreover, it was a café specializing in drip coffee.

Not knowing what drip coffee was, Jingyeom did some research the day before he started.

During the interview, the manager said he didn’t need to worry about making the drip coffee as the staff would handle it, so Jingyeom only watched beverage-making videos, mainly on YouTube.

He also learned how to use the POS system.

Although POS systems vary by store, knowing the basic operations made it easier to get used to any POS system.

In franchises, there are uniforms, but since it was a private café, there was no uniform. He just had to dress neatly, so he prepared a white shirt and black pants, ironing them carefully.

Jingyeom hadn’t been good at ironing initially, but after doing it a few times while selling clothes, he had gotten the hang of it.

He made thorough preparations for his new job.

* * *