* * *
After the phone call with Minji and his internal resolution, Yoonwoo’s time began to flow in a different direction.
He still spent most of his time in his room, but he was no longer lying around as lethargically as before.
Sometimes, he would sit by the window, bask in the sunlight, and draw absent lines in his sketchbook or scribble down passing thoughts.
When the sun was out, he would sit on the porch bench and quietly keep watch beside Gaeul as he dozed.
Because of this, strangely enough, his lost appetite gradually returned.
He no longer avoided the meal tray placed in front of his door, and the days he finished more than half the food, instead of just a couple of spoonfuls, increased.
He was still tormented by nightmares at night, but the time he fell into a deep sleep without medication was lengthening, little by little.
Thanks to this, a color gradually returned to his face, which had been as pale as a corpse.
The firmly closed door of his heart seemed to have opened just a tiny crack, enough for the breeze to pass through.
Though he didn’t want to admit it himself, he was slowly recovering.
Dojin quietly observed these small changes in Yoonwoo, missing nothing.
He was relieved on days he ate a little more, and hopeful when the time he spent basking in the sun in the yard grew longer.
He still watched him with concern, but he tried hard not to speak to him rashly or make a point of his changes, which might burden him.
He simply tended to his meals and checked from a distance to see if he needed anything.
His patience was another expression of his deep feelings for Yoonwoo.
He could wait as long as it took if it meant Yoonwoo could smile again.
Then came one particular day.
The afternoon was unusually bright and warm.
Early March in Jeju was still chilly with the sea breeze, but the air definitely carried a touch of spring.
Dojin, who was hanging up the guesthouse laundry in the yard, spotted Yoonwoo sitting on the porch bench, stroking Gaeul on his lap and gazing blankly at the distant mountain.
His profile still looked fragile, but instead of the complete emptiness he had shown before, there was a visible sense of being stifled, like a bird confined to a small cage.
Even surrounded by such beautiful scenery, he seemed trapped in his own darkness.
Dojin hesitated for a moment but cautiously approached him.
He was a little nervous about being refused, but he wanted to pull Yoonwoo out of that feeling of confinement.
“Mr. Yoonwoo, the weather is really nice today.”
Dojin spoke first.
He tried to keep his voice as bright and natural as possible.
Yoonwoo slowly turned his head to look at him.
His eyes were still darkly fathomless.
“…If you’re feeling suffocated, how about we go for a short walk on one of the Gotjawal forest trails nearby?”
Dojin suggested, trying to sound as un-pressuring as possible, like inviting a friend.
“There aren’t many people, and it’s quiet… it’s a good place to just go for a walk and get some air. I go there sometimes when my head is full of complicated thoughts, and it helps me feel a little better. The air is incredibly fresh, too. If you keep staying here, you might feel even more trapped….”
He cautiously watched Yoonwoo’s reaction, thinking he might be refused.
“…….”
Yoonwoo hesitated for a moment.
Going outside was still something he was reluctant to do.
Unfamiliar places and scenes sometimes triggered unexpected memories.
He wasn’t ready to face the world yet.
But the resolution he had made to himself a few days ago came to mind.
‘Let’s move forward, little by little.’
Staying cooped up in his room wasn’t the solution.
And Dojin’s eyes, looking at him, held no coercion or expectation, only pure concern.
Yoonwoo was grateful for his consideration.
Maybe… just for a short while, it would be okay.
“…Yes.”
It was a small voice, but a clear answer.
Dojin’s face instantly brightened.
He smiled radiantly, unable to hide his joy.
“Really? Then… let’s go when you’re ready!”
His smile was as bright and warm as the sunshine.
The two got into Dojin’s father’s truck and headed toward the Gotjawal forest.
After parking, Dojin walked slowly a few steps behind Yoonwoo, matching his pace.
The Gotjawal forest was a unique primeval forest formed by a complex entanglement of trees and vines over a rock field created by volcanic activity.
As they entered the entrance, the cool, clear air mixed with the smell of moss and earth enveloped the two.
Sunlight filtered through the leaves covering the sky, creating mysterious streaks of light, and only the quiet chirping of nameless birds and the sound of leaves rustling in the wind echoed around them.
It felt as if they had entered another world where time stood still.
Dojin said nothing much, as if not wanting to disturb Yoonwoo.
He only occasionally pointed out small things, saying, “This tree looks really strange, doesn’t it?” or “Look at the color of the moss here. Isn’t it incredibly beautiful?”
His voice was excited, but he was careful with every word, watching Yoonwoo’s reaction.
Yoonwoo merely nodded without answering or followed Dojin’s gaze.
Dojin felt his stiff expression loosen very subtly.
He was secretly pleased by that small change.
Yoonwoo slowly walked along the forest path, looking around.
The complexly intertwined vines, the trees that had rooted tenaciously in the rock crevices, the green moss glistening in the sunlight.
He could hear the crunching of dry leaves underfoot.
In the raw, vibrant nature, with nothing artificial in sight, he took a deep breath for the first time in a long time.
The clear, cool air penetrating deep into his lungs seemed to clear his mind a little.
The anxiety and pain weighing down his chest hadn’t disappeared entirely, but at least at this moment, the weight felt a little lighter.
He unconsciously glanced at Dojin’s broad back, walking quietly beside him.
In his image, silently walking, considerate of him, Yoonwoo once again felt a kind of comfort and a very faint flutter of excitement that was different from Joowon.
As they were nearly leaving the forest trail, Dojin pointed to a small teahouse sign covered in vines.
“Mr. Yoonwoo, there’s a really quiet teahouse right there… would you like to grab a warm cup of tea before we go? It’s my treat!”
He checked Yoonwoo’s expression.
Yoonwoo hesitated for a moment, but he was thirsty, and his heart had softened a little from the walk, so he nodded.
The log cabin teahouse was small and quiet.
Green forest could be seen outside the window, and a subtle scent of wood and tea permeated the interior.
As the two sat down at a window seat, the pleasant-looking middle-aged owner approached and handed them a menu.
“Oh, what handsome young men. I just finished making a batch of delicious lemon preserve; how about a warm lemon tea? It’s wonderful.”
The owner smiled and recommended.
‘Lemon tea….’
The moment he heard that word, Yoonwoo’s expression froze for a moment.
For Yoonwoo, it wasn’t just the name of a tea.
It was the very tea he had received with Joowon’s clumsy but sincere apology eight years ago, the first time Joowon had knocked on his firmly closed heart.
Yoonwoo had been touched by his thoughtfulness, remembering his trivial preference for sour flavors, and his frozen heart had begun to melt with that one warm, sweet and sour cup of lemon tea.
Since that day, lemon tea had taken on a special meaning for Yoonwoo.
It was a cherished drink, a kind of habit unique to them, symbolizing the beginning of his relationship with Joowon.
That was why Yoonwoo had enjoyed drinking lemon tea more than any other tea for the past eight years.
But now… all those memories were stained by the black smear of cruel betrayal.
The cherished symbol had now become a painful marker that made his stomach twist just by recalling it.
The fresh scent had turned into nausea, and the warm comfort had morphed into betrayal, assaulting his memory.
He felt a cold pain and a wave of nausea in his chest again.
Yoonwoo’s brow furrowed slightly without his realizing it, and his eyes instantly clouded over.
He didn’t notice that his hands were trembling faintly beneath the table.
Dojin, right next to him, didn’t miss Yoonwoo’s subtle change in expression and his trembling.
Seeing Yoonwoo’s face darken at the mention of lemon tea, he couldn’t know the exact reason, but he instinctively realized that the menu item brought back a very bad memory for Yoonwoo.
Before Yoonwoo could reply, he gently addressed the owner.
“Ah, no thank you for the lemon tea. Could we possibly have two warm hot chocolates instead?”
The café owner looked slightly puzzled by his sudden change of order, but Dojin simply offered a gentle smile.
Yoonwoo also looked at Dojin with a puzzled look for suddenly changing the menu.
Dojin just shrugged and turned his head, pretending it was nothing.
Yoonwoo realized that Dojin had noticed his state and changed the order for him.
He was surprised once more by his careful consideration and looked at him with complex feelings.
* * *
