GTLTGIDES chapter 50

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He chuckled softly. I had only meant to ask him to hold my hand, but he went as far as to give me a hug.

“Well, I guess that’s one good thing about having a comrade.”

With no particular reason to refuse, I slipped into his arms.

His warm embrace and broad chest wrapped around me as if waiting for me.

I closed my eyes and listened to Cha Junseong’s heartbeat. My mind, which had been so tangled, felt like it was finally clearing up.

“What happened to you while I was on my mission?”

“……”

“Tell me. Please.”

There was a note of desperation in Cha Junseong’s voice.

But I had nothing to tell him about Elizabeth Falwell.

I trust Cha Junseong.

But trust aside, I couldn’t ask him about Elizabeth Falwell, or why he was in our country.

‘I’ am aware of the foundational work of this world, “The Genius Guide’s Melancholy”, and of Elizabeth Falwell, the head of the Falwell family, one of the strongest figures in this world and someone who has made significant contributions.

But Yang Heewoon isn’t. There was no way, not even the slightest chance.

I could try to pry indirectly, but Cha Junseong, having been deceived once before, would be cautious. It would be more likely for me to be counterattacked and exposed, and I didn’t want to make things worse.

Still, I didn’t have nowhere to lean on with Cha Junseong.

I bit my lips tightly.

My body trembled, not from cold or pain, but from anger and the urge to cry.

Tears welled up in an instant.

Out of hatred, so much hatred.

“I hate people.”

“……”

“They point fingers at Eunsoo. Eunsoo is a victim… even a child… yet they hold his to such harsh standards.”

“……”

Even in the book, it was dreadful.

“The Genius Guide’s Melancholy” is a gloomy story, so to maintain the genre’s identity, it makes sense that Eunsoo would be put through mentally taxing developments.

All these experiences build up to the Eunsoo we see at the end, and the darkness makes the light appear brighter.

I know that.

Knowing that, I still chose not to skip certain parts even during a reread.

And yet, this part where society points fingers at Eunsoo was so hard to watch that I skipped over it a few times.

It’s not just because it’s suffocating.

It’s painful. It’s not something that can be resolved just because one person changes their mind.

It’s a terrible reality, impossible to wish away.

It was tough enough when it was just a character in a book, but hearing it directly with my own ears is even more heartbreaking.

“…I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing, Junseong?”

“Because I hate his too.”

“No… Why would you say that? What has he done to deserve your hate… It’s upsetting…”

“I’m sorry…”

“Junseong, don’t hate Eunsoo. Please, I beg you. Why hate her? He’s a really good child. he even wakes up early to cook for me, saying he wants to help me gain weight because I’m too skinny… Where can you find such a precious child? The real bad one is Jake Falwell, that bastard who deserves to be chewed up…”

I clenched my fists tightly.

As my anger reached a boiling point, my body trembled uncontrollably.

I squeezed my eyes shut.

“On top of everything, telling a child who’s lost their powers that it’s for the best, damn it. God, I hate it so much…”

“Heewoon.”

“Those damned people. Those shameless bastards. Do they want to boost their self-esteem by pointing fingers at a child? Are they jealous of a kid? How pathetic…”

“Heewoon.”

“Why? Why do you keep calling me…?”

“If you get too angry, it’ll take a toll on your body.”

“But… I’m angry. I hate them so much. Why are there only bad people? Why are they so harsh to a child? Who do they think they are?”

Ah…

Cha Junseong was right. I got so heated that my head started to hurt.

“Heewoon?”

“Huh… Ah…”

“Heewoon! What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

“It’s okay, it’s okay…”

I wasn’t okay at the moment, but I felt like I would be soon.

So, let’s not shout. It makes my head ring…

I rested my head against Cha Junseong’s chest.

Listening to his heartbeat calmed me down.

I opened my eyes. I was comfortable being in his embrace right now… but I wondered if Cha Junseong was comfortable too.

“…Is holding me like this uncomfortable?”

“No, not at all.”

“You’ve been exerting yourself a lot today. You probably want some guiding…”

“I’m holding back from wanting to kiss you. That’s what’s more uncomfortable.”

“…What?”

Did he catch a virus that makes him die if he doesn’t kiss someone?

Why is Cha Junseong saying this?

“Uh…”

As soon as I heard the word ‘kiss,’ I remembered what I’d done earlier today.

Could it still smell?

I had a mint candy and even gargled, but I’m worried.

“Today… it’s a bit…”

“I want to.”

His face suddenly moved closer.

He genuinely seemed like he wanted to, as his hand supported my chin, ready to force it open if necessary.

“Is it not possible?”

“You’ll… really regret it.”

“I won’t regret it.”

As he spoke, Cha Junseong moved his face even closer to mine.

Damn it.

He’s close.

Before I knew it, my view was filled with his well-sculpted, statue-like face.

Starting from his high nose bridge, his features extended artfully, ending sharply without a single flaw.

My gaze was captured by his long, lowered eyelashes.

“Ugh…”

In the end, I missed the chance to refuse.

His lips, a little rough yet warm, pressed against mine.

Surprised, my lips parted, and his hot breath seeped in.

It was the same breath that once calmed me when I was trembling with fear.

Almost reflexively, I parted my lips further and reached out, wrapping my arms around Cha Junseong’s waist.

The crisp texture of his suit clinging to his muscular body didn’t convey any painful imagery, but it did tell me that the one whose lips I was pressed against was indeed Cha Junseong.

With my eyes closed, as I let Cha Junseong guide my breath and intertwine our tongues, I suddenly realized that the sticky feeling of hatred that had spread throughout my body had disappeared.

I read somewhere that physical contact can reduce stress.

Was that why Cha Junseong insisted on kissing me?

‘So gentle…’

I chuckled softly against his lips.

But I couldn’t enjoy this warm, ticklish feeling for long.

Occasionally, people passing by on the walking path glanced at us and whispered.

If someone recognized Cha Junseong, it would be troublesome.

“I’m okay now, really, um…”

I tried to push Cha Junseong away.

But he didn’t let me go. Instead, as soon as I tried to push him away, he pulled me closer, trapping me in his embrace.

He pressed down on the back of my head.

Our tightly pressed lips locked seamlessly, and soon my breath was completely taken away.

Cha Junseong didn’t even allow me the brief words to ask him to stop. Just receiving him, gasping as sensations tingled up my spine, my breath grew shallower, and my strength faded from my body.

‘He must be good at kissing too, right? He seems like he’d be good at everything…’

Suddenly, I recalled something someone had said at the field control team’s tent.

Every time I’d locked lips with Cha Junseong before, it had always been for guiding, so I never thought much of it.

Kissing him always came with the pain of my heart being crushed.

But now I understood.

That person was right. Cha Junseong was good at kissing.

Otherwise, my body wouldn’t have gotten this warm.

“Ugh, huh, ah…”

Blood rushed to my face.

I must look as strange as I did when I kissed Rex in front of my house not long ago.

As I half-forgot to breathe and gasped painfully, his lips finally parted.

But with his arms still wrapped tightly around me and his hand still holding my chin, I couldn’t hide my disheveled face.

My eyelids trembled in embarrassment.

Why is Cha Junseong acting like this? Is it because of pent-up emotions…?

“I… if you’re really tired, I can guide… even now…”

“I’m fine. Right now, just worry about yourself. You always overreact when it comes to that kid, and that’s what’s ruining your health.”

Cha Junseong spoke as if in frustration, and his lips briefly touched mine before pulling away. But he was still so close that our noses almost touched.

Looking at me with his dark eyes, Cha Junseong said, “That’s why I dislike that kid.”

I understood from his eyes.

Just like Rex, who was deeply wounded the last time he met me before Jake’s rampage, Cha Junseong had been hurt as well.

It’s probably because of me again. Because I neglected my health, Eunsoo, who injured a teammate, is being resented.

I felt troubled.

If things continue like this, Cha Junseong will deeply regret it.

How could it make sense to hurt your destined partner while worrying about someone like me, who might soon will die?

“Yang Heewoon, I don’t understand why you are so deeply involved with that kid’s affairs.”

“…Well, it’s because Eunsoo is still a child…”

“It’s not like you care about every child.”

“…”

I closed my mouth.

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