GTLTGIDES chapter 38

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‘Ughhhhh!’

As soon as I opened the front door, a musty smell hit me like a wave, and I screamed internally. I quickly let go of Eunsoo’s hand and rushed inside.

“Eunsoo, I’m sorry. Our house… Oh, dear. I should have come earlier to clean up. The last time I left, I was in such a hurry for work that I couldn’t do it. It’s a bit of a mess, but… After you’ve had a bath, it’ll be somewhat tidied up. You can use any soap or towel you like… I’ll get some clothes ready for you to change into when you’re done. My clothes are a bit worn out, but they’ll do for now. I’ll buy you some new ones soon.”

I hastily picked up the clothes scattered around the house.

Damn it. When was the last time I did a thorough cleaning?

I was sick, and after discovering that Eunsoo had been assaulted, I was too distressed to deal with it.

But if I’d known I was going to bring Eunsoo here, I would have arranged for a cleaning service a day or two beforehand. This is the worst possible first impression.

I gathered up the clothes and opened the windows to air out the musty interior.

At least there was no mold in the time I was away, thank goodness.

…I was a bit worried about the state of the bathroom, though.

“Oh, right. Let me clean the bathtub for you. Just come in and sit down for a moment. Don’t just stand in the entrance.”

“It’s too much.”

“Huh?”

“I could go to a shelter. Why should you take responsibility for me? You barely know me…”

“…”

I stopped in my tracks and turned to Eunsoo.

‘I thought he was refusing to come in because the house was too dirty…’

But that wasn’t it.

This was something much more serious. The kid was on the verge of tears.

Why was Eunsoo suddenly saying this?

When I first suggested living together, he blushed like a little kid and seemed happy.

There could only be one reason.

‘Ah, so he heard…’

He must have heard the conversation I had with Rex.

Even though I lowered my voice and moved away, he must have heard it all.

He really is an S-class guide.

Usually, guides are physically no different from ordinary people, but Eunsoo is different.

His senses are much sharper.

‘But he probably doesn’t really mean it.’

If he really thought it was overstepping for me to bring him to my house, he would’ve pushed me away much earlier. He wouldn’t have even come this far.

But Eunsoo was the kid who held onto my hand tightly until I let go first, startled by the state of the house.

So maybe there’s still a chance to mend his hurt feelings.

The messy house was no longer the issue.

I dropped the clothes I was holding and walked over to where Eunsoo stood at the entrance.

I lowered myself to his level.

Even though there wasn’t much of a height difference between us, I lowered myself further to meet his eyes and took his hands in mine.

“Eunsoo, it’s been a while since you had a warm bath, right? I’ll clean the bathroom first. You can stay in there for as long as you want, even if it’s for an hour or two. And after you’ve had dinner, slept through the night, and eaten breakfast tomorrow, then tell me. If you still feel uncomfortable living with me and don’t want to stay in this house, I won’t stop you.”

“…”

“Tomorrow, the Department of Management will call. If you say you don’t want to go, even if I say I want to keep you here, they’ll probably take you right away. So, there’s no need to be afraid…”

“No, I don’t want to go.”

Eunsoo urgently grabbed both of my hands.

Only after squeezing him tightly did he seem to relax and let out a deep breath.

Then, he looked at me cautiously and said,

“I want to stay with you.”

His voice trembled slightly. His pale gray eyes were filled with anxiety as he looked at me.

And then, he cried out, telling me not to abandon him, that he wanted to stay with me.

All the talk about me being meddlesome or whatever might have been his way of protecting himself.

Maybe he was trying to keep his distance from me before I could abandon him, to avoid getting hurt again.

Just like a stray dog that, after being hurt by its previous owner whom it loved too much, bares its teeth at the kind hand reaching out to become its new family.

I smiled to reassure him.

“Yeah, come on in. This is your home now.”

Led by my hand, Eunsoo stepped inside and took off his shoes.

Click.

And the door closed behind us.

Fortunately, the bathroom was in better shape than I had expected.

But it was still far from ready to use, so I decided to clean it together with Eunsoo.

I didn’t want to put my precious child to work on his first day at home, but Eunsoo, who was anxiously worried that I might abandon him, might start digging himself into a hole with wild thoughts if I left him alone. It was better to do something together.

And it seemed my choice wasn’t wrong. Eunsoo was thrilled to be doing something helpful. Seeing him scrubbing away with enthusiasm made me proud.

As I wiped the mirror, I kept glancing at Eunsoo, and couldn’t help but smile. Trying to suppress it, I called out to him softly.

“Eunsoo.”

“Yes?”

“Why did you do it? Jake might have done something bad to you, but why did you do something bad to Rex?”

“Rex…? Oh, the redhead?”

“Yeah.”

“…”

Eunsoo, who had been vigorously scrubbing the tub with baking soda, suddenly grew quiet.

He hesitated, unable to answer right away, and his hands stopped moving.

I didn’t press him for an answer. I knew that when he was ready, he would tell me the truth.

It wasn’t until he finished scrubbing the tub that Eunsoo spoke again.

“Because I was… jealous.”

“Huh? Jealous?”

“Yes… I wanted to be with you too. But you didn’t come, and I had to stay at the convenience store, while he got to be by your side… I hated him for that…”

Oh my.

I was so shocked I dropped the showerhead, which I had been using to rinse the floor.

In the midst of the sudden chaos caused by Eunsoo getting doused with water and screaming, I found myself laughing like an idiot.

I couldn’t help it. Eunsoo, wanting to be by my side, was jealous because of it!

I could die without regret… No, I shouldn’t die, but I felt like I could go to heaven… No, I shouldn’t go to heaven either, but…!

In any case, I was in the best mood.

‘Hang in there, my fragile heart…’

My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it might give out any moment, but I resolved to stay alive.

I took a deep breath and finally managed to control my expression.

“Next time, you shouldn’t do that.”

“…I know. It was a bad thing to do.”

“You’re going to apologize too, right?”

“That… I’ll think about it.”

“Don’t take too long. Apologies are all about timing. If you wait too long, it gets awkward for everyone.”

“…Okay, I understand. I won’t make you worry anymore.”

He was so obedient and sweet that it made my heart swell.

How could such a precious child exist in this world?

His face is beautiful, his eyes are beautiful, his heart is beautiful, he’s the cutest, kindest, smartest, most lovable child in the world…

I found myself grinning again without realizing it.

I should have started filling the tub by now, but I didn’t want to leave Eunsoo’s side.

“Eunsoo, do you want to take a bath together?”

“No. Go away, please. Just disappear from my sight.”

Disappear from his sight?

Before I could process the shock, Eunsoo pushed me out of the bathroom and shut the door with a loud bang.

“Ah, I’m soaked…”

I thought only Eunsoo was wet, but when I looked down, I realized I was drenched too. I had been so excited about Eunsoo’s confession of jealousy that I hadn’t even noticed.

My clothes clung uncomfortably to my body. They were thin and white, revealing my frail frame.

Is that why he didn’t want to see me?

‘I guess no one wants a guardian who looks this weak.’

I smiled bitterly as I changed into dry clothes. I just felt bad for not being the reliable protector I should be.

‘It’s okay. Being a mental protector is important too.’

It’s no use longing for something I can’t have. I have to do my best with what I can do.

Apparently, my home wasn’t too uncomfortable for Eunsoo, because he spent a good three hours in the bathroom.

When Eunsoo, all warm and relaxed, finally came out, I handed him a small bottle of milk with a straw that I had bought from the convenience store while waiting for him.

“Did you enjoy your bath?”

“Yes…”

I gently dried his hair with a towel. Eunsoo’s hair was thin and abundant, soft like baby fluff.

Even though he had used the same shampoo I usually did, he smelled inexplicably more baby-like and fresh.

“Next time, I’ll help scrub your back too.”

“No need. Don’t even think about coming in. And stop treating me like a kid…”

But you are a kid. Like a little chick, as yellow as the banana milk you’re holding.

But kids never want to admit he is kids. Understanding the delicate heart of this little one who wanted to be seen as an adult, I just smiled softly.

Eunsoo frowned in response.

“So annoying…”

Suddenly, his face came close to mine. I was so startled I almost screamed.

His pale gray eyes, now filled with irritation, glared at me from just inches away.