* * *
If this were the 21st century in Korea, he might not have had to agonize over such things.
But this was the medieval era, and such matters were crucial for preserving a family.
Especially now, with the Emperor constantly eyeing the North.
Others might dismiss his concerns, saying Ronen was there, so what did it matter?
But no one could predict the future.
‘Ronen is still young, and to keep the North strong, the Duke will need an heir…’
Of course, judging from the personalities of His Grace and Ronen, if they found out about his concerns, they’d likely suggest adopting a child.
While that solution might give the Emperor an excuse to cause trouble, the tightly-knit North would undoubtedly overcome it.
‘…Still, hesitating despite knowing all this is just because I’m being selfish.’
Ed wanted to see a child who resembled the Duke and Ronen.
Even if his current worries prevented them from being together, he couldn’t help but dream of giving them the ideal family he had imagined.
‘So get it together, Ed. Don’t forget why you followed Ronen in the first place.’
If he truly cared for the Duke, rejecting his feelings here was the right thing to do.
‘It might hurt His Grace for a while. But he’ll surely overcome it quickly and realize what’s best for the North. And one day…’
‘He might even think it was fortunate that I turned him down.’
That final thought slashed deeply through Ed’s heart, leaving a lasting wound.
Even as he resolved to turn away from the Duke’s feelings, he couldn’t bring himself to speak.
Noticing the storm of emotions swirling in Ed’s eyes, the Duke gazed at him intently before offering an apology.
“I’m sorry, Ed.”
The Duke’s sudden apology only served to fluster Ed.
‘Did he figure out what I’m thinking?’
“No, Your Grace. I think… you’ve known all along, haven’t you? About what happened in the cave and what I said back then.”
The Duke hadn’t expected Ed to bring up the incident first, and for a moment, he seemed surprised.
But he quickly regained his composure and responded.
“Yes. But my memories were hazy, and more than anything, I wasn’t in my right mind back then… I thought it might all just be a delusion. But hearing you say this now, I guess it really did happen.”
As the Duke rubbed his face awkwardly with his palm, Ed felt his emotions stir like waves once more.
“Even if everything you said back then had been a figment of my imagination, my confession wouldn’t have changed. Hah… I’m sorry. I meant to wait until you were ready, but it’s my first time feeling this way about someone, and it’s hard to control my emotions.”
Realizing that the redness of the Duke’s face, which he had attributed to the firelight, was actually from embarrassment, Ed felt his own cheeks heat up as well.
Noticing Ed’s reaction, the Duke cleared his throat and looked at him seriously.
“If you need time to think, I’ll wait as long as you need. So when you’re ready, give me your answer.”
Ed wanted nothing more than to throw himself into the Duke’s arms and confess his feelings.
But he swallowed the words and, with an effort to stay composed, replied evenly.
“I promise I won’t keep you waiting too long.”
The Duke smiled gently at Ed’s earnest response and nodded.
Hypnotized by that gaze, Ed stared until the Duke rose from the bed, prompting him to follow suit.
But the Duke stopped him.
“It’s late, and you must have a lot to think about. Stay here tonight. I’ll sleep in the study.”
“No, Your Grace—”
When Ed tried to get up, the Duke lightly shook his head and pressed him back down onto the bed.
“Don’t. I… I don’t think I can sleep here. If I stay, I’ll keep thinking about my confession.”
“…Oh.”
The Duke pulled the blanket up to Ed’s neck, gazing at him for a moment before striding away with deliberate steps.
Though the Duke’s silhouette, now distant from the fireplace, was obscured in shadow, Ed was certain that his ears were redder than the flames still crackling nearby.
Ed, equally flustered, could only stare at the bed’s covers.
Yet no matter how long he waited, the sound of the door closing didn’t come.
Feeling uneasy, he glanced up cautiously to find the Duke, who seemed ready to leave, standing still with his hand on the doorknob.
The sound of wood crackling in the fireplace repeated several times before the Duke finally spoke.
“One thing you need to know for sure, Ed.”
“…What?”
“Even if you confessed first, I was the one who fell for you first. From the moment I saw you at the Earl’s estate, it was love at first sight for me.”
Click.
For a moment, Ed couldn’t process what he had just heard and stared blankly at the closed door.
But as soon as the Duke was gone, Ed’s face began to grow redder and redder.
The next morning, after a sleepless night of tossing and turning, Ed stood at the door, his bloodshot eyes betraying his exhaustion.
He sighed heavily, gripping the doorknob.
‘How am I supposed to face His Grace now?’
After several minutes of fretting and ruffling his hair, Ed realized he couldn’t waste any more time.
Shaking off his hesitation, he left his room and headed toward the banquet hall, where preparations were in full swing.
“Ertel! Please take care of this!”
“Tens, move those pots over there!”
Even though it was early morning, the hall was bustling with activity.
Noticing Ed lingering at the entrance, Jaynon called out to him.
“Oh, Ed! These are the returned invitations. Could you check if there were any address errors?”
‘Right. This isn’t the time for personal worries.’
With only two days left until Ronen’s birthday, the entire northern castle was buzzing with preparations.
‘What kind of host lets themselves get distracted at a time like this?’
Shaking his head, Ed quickly got to work.
“butler Ed! Where should I place these?”
“Ed, didn’t you say we needed to order more pots?”
“What kind of floral arrangement should we use for the staircase?”
As soon as he solved one issue, two more cropped up.
By the time Ed managed to handle everything, it was already lunchtime.
Finally able to catch his breath, Ed sat down at the dining table, only for memories of the previous night to flood back.
He exhaled a long sigh.
‘Get a grip, Ed. Everyone’s been working tirelessly for days without rest to pull off this party you planned. Stop being so scatterbrained. Focus on making Ronen’s birthday a success!’
Resolving himself, Ed shook his head vigorously and placed a blank sheet of stationery and a pen on the table.
He began writing a letter he hadn’t had time to send to a friend the day before.
As soon as he finished, Tens walked into the dining hall.
Ed handed him the letter right away, grabbed a piece of bread from the untouched food on the table, and stood.
“Tens, could you send this to the address written here?”
“A letter? You handed it to me the moment you saw me—must be urgent, huh?”
“Yes, please send it as soon as possible. I should’ve sent it earlier, but I got caught up with work. Sorry for the trouble.”
Noticing that the letter was addressed to the Count of Herins, Tens glanced up in surprise, but Ed was already walking away. Scratching the back of his head, he called out, “Alright! Leave it to me.”
Having had nothing but a single piece of bread, Ed spent the afternoon busily rushing around again.
It wasn’t until nighttime that he stumbled back to his room, utterly exhausted.
He collapsed onto his bed, burying his face in his pillow.
‘According to the gossip among the staff, young master Ronen spent the day stuck to His Grace like glue. I guess I don’t need to worry about his adolescent moods anymore.’
Imagining Ronen’s sunny smile, Ed chuckled to himself.
But the warmth quickly faded as memories of the Duke’s words resurfaced.
‘How can I turn him down without hurting him too much? He’s such a smart man; he’d see through any clumsy excuse…’
Though Ed was determined to respond promptly, his body, drained from exhaustion, gave out, and he fell asleep in no time.
The next morning, Ed’s schedule was just as relentless.
Reviewing guest lists and menus with department heads, preparing contingency plans for any mishaps—the list of tasks seemed endless.
He barely had time to eat.
Crunch, crunch.
The only thing keeping him and the staff from collapsing from malnutrition were the energy bars Ed had preemptively ordered the chef to prepare using chocolate and nuts.
They had been a lifesaver.
“Tens, is the space for the guests’ carriages sorted out?”
“Yeah, we’re expanding the lot by moving the fences. It should be done by evening.”
“Everyone still has their handbooks, right? Even with all our preparation, problems are bound to arise with this many people. Follow the tags I’ve assigned to each situation…”
By the time they wrapped up discussions, the sun was already setting outside the window.
“Hah… Just one more day. It feels like there’s so much more to do since this is our first event after the reorganization.”
Tens, seated next to Ed, stretched and slumped over the table.
Everyone else groaned in agreement, doing the same—except for the chief butler, who promptly left after finishing his duties.
Feeling his own limbs grow heavy, Ed forced himself up with an exaggerated grunt.
“Well, I’m heading to the village for a bit.”
“Want me to come with you?”
“No, you must be just as tired. Rest while you can.”
Summoning his determination once again, Ed hurried to the village before nightfall.
Even with his efforts, by the time he reached the village gates, dusk had already settled.
“Ugh, I’m so sleepy.”
Fighting off his drowsiness, Ed stopped by the blacksmith to pick up the birthday gift he had ordered for Ronen.
‘I know Ronen loves swords, but he should have at least one proper toy.’
After thanking the blacksmith thoroughly, Ed quickly made his way back to the castle.
‘I have to wake up early again tomorrow. Let’s see… It’s 9 p.m. now. By the time I get back to the castle, it’ll be a little past 10. After washing up, I’ll be in bed by 11, hopefully.’
Checking his pocket watch, which he rarely let out of his sight, Ed forced his weary legs to keep moving.
* * *
