* * *

“I don’t think you’ve fundamentally changed. You weren’t any worse back then, nor were you better. If you feel weaker now, it’s probably just growing pains.”

“……”

“Everyone goes through it—children, adults, even someone like me, an old woman.”

Elizabeth spoke kindly, her warm smile putting me somewhat at ease, though it didn’t erase all my worries.

“But… what if everything goes wrong because of me?”

“What a ridiculous thought.”

The hand that had been patting my hair moved to my cheek, wiping away tears I hadn’t realized were falling.

“Even if things go wrong, it won’t be your fault. It would simply mean we weren’t strong enough to overcome the crisis.”

“No, that’s not true. We could’ve succeeded—if not for me!”

“You have a strange habit of downplaying your strengths while exaggerating your faults.”

“……”

Her soft laughter cut through my panic.

I faltered, my lips moving silently, before lowering my head again.

I rubbed at my eyes with the back of my hand.

…Maybe I’d been overthinking it.

I let out a trembling sigh.

As if sensing I’d gathered my thoughts, Elizabeth spoke again.

“Child, don’t dwell too deeply. Just do what you want to do.”

After a pause, she added:

“What is it that you want?”

The answer had always been clear to me. From a long time ago.

“…I want to go back. I want to see Eunsoo and the others.”

Even if they scolded me for being alive, called me shameless, or hurled harsh words at me, I didn’t care.

I just wanted to let them know I was alive.

To tell them they didn’t need to worry about me anymore or feel guilty.

To assure them they didn’t need to think about someone like me ever again.

“And… I want to help someone—anyone.”

---

When Eunsoo confirmed Yang Heewoon was alive, he felt momentary relief.

But it didn’t last long.

Although he quickly found a plane ticket to Polwel’s estate, he stopped short of making the reservation.

Like Espers, Guides were considered national assets and faced many restrictions on travel.

With Gates appearing frequently these days, it was unlikely the authorities would grant him permission.

But that wasn’t what stopped Eunsoo.

Even if the government said no, he could have made them say yes.

He was sure of that.

It was something else—something he couldn’t quite understand.

“Why do I have to go to him?”

Yang Heewoon was the one who had done wrong, the one who had abandoned Eunsoo without a word.

It was Yang Heewoon’s responsibility to make things right. Not Eunsoo’s.

So, he decided not to go.

Instead, he called at dawn, timing it for when Heewoon’s side of the world would be waking up.

Elizabeth Polwel, as his guardian, had always provided her contact information during her travels, so it wasn’t difficult to reach her.

Extending this much effort felt tolerable.

…Though thanks to her “secrecy obsession,” it took some effort to actually connect the call.

“Hello. It’s been a while.”

• Indeed. The last time was during that ‘Heesoo’ boy’s birthday, wasn’t it?

After an irritating series of steps, the call finally went through.

Seeing Yang Heewoon’s unperturbed face on the screen made Eunsoo’s irritation spike, but he suppressed it.

They didn’t know he already knew Heewoon’s location.

That gave him an advantage—a strategy.

Despite Heewoon being a traitor, Eunsoo couldn’t entirely forget the six months they’d spent together.

He was willing to give Heewoon one last chance.

To acknowledge his mistakes and come to Eunsoo himself.

“The thing is… he means everything to me…”

So Eunsoo played his part.

He pretended to be the desperate, grieving boy who’d lost everything because of a cruel betrayal.

• I see. You must be very worried.

But the smile on Heewoon’s wrinkled face didn’t fade.

Instead, he spoke in a tone entirely devoid of concern:

• But it’s curious—your complexion has improved. Have you had some good news? Tell me about it.

‘This old bastard.’

Sharp as ever.

Quick to read between the lines.

Clearly, he was telling Eunsoo to stop pretending.

Realizing the act was pointless, Eunsoo’s expression turned cold.

It was a sudden shift, but Heewoon didn’t seem fazed. If anything, he smiled wider.

• Take care of yourself, eat well, rest properly. Someone out there surely wants that for you.

“If that’s what they wanted…”

They should’ve never abandoned me in the first place.

Ye Eunsoo abruptly ended the call instead of unleashing the fury boiling up to his throat.

He thought that if he showed concern for Yang Heewoon’s safety, the people on the Polwel side might be persuaded to let him go.

But judging by their attitude, they had no intention of complying with his wishes.

The first plan had failed.

I didn’t expect much to begin with.

Recalling his past conversations with that old man, this outcome was entirely predictable.

So… there was no reason to feel disappointed.

Leaning heavily against the chair, he closed his eyes.

It was to plan his next move, but before his mind could cool, the emotions he hadn’t yet dispelled surged once again.

In the end, a suppressed irritation slipped out from his parted lips.

“Ah, seriously…”

He hated Yang Heewoon.

He resented Yang Heewoon.

He loathed him.

What did I ever do to deserve being abandoned like this?

Not just abandoned—he had fled the country altogether.

Even though he could’ve reached out at any moment, he never did.

Not once, not even to send word that he was alive.

He had promised to become family.

He had said he wouldn’t let go of him.

He had lured him in with sweet words like “I love you.”

So how could he act this way?

How can a person be so cruel?

“… It’s infuriating.”

He covered his face with both hands, seeking solace in the darkness.

But that too didn’t work.

As soon as his vision was blocked, Yang Heewoon’s face floated vividly in the black void: Yang Heewoon approaching with a towel to dry his hair on the last day of his adolescence; Yang Heewoon exchanging New Year’s greetings under the ringing bell; Yang Heewoon kissing him and staring in wide-eyed surprise…

None of those moments were out of the ordinary.

He hadn’t seemed like someone on the verge of leaving so irresponsibly.

Then why…?

His hands clenched, veins standing out on the backs of them.

Why… is it always me…?

The one who suffered and burned with anxiety should have been Yang Heewoon, not him.

Yang Heewoon was an adult without a single redeeming quality.

He couldn’t cook, leaving the house filthy and unkempt.

If left alone, he wouldn’t even feed himself.

If it weren’t for Eunsoo, a minor at the time, Yang Heewoon probably wouldn’t have lived like a human being at all.

It wasn’t as if he had good looks, a great physique, or even decent health.

He had the audacity to act as a guardian without a shred of dependability.

His frail frame seemed like it would shatter if held too tightly, forcing Eunsoo to always be careful with his strength.

Sleeping beside him had been nerve-wracking for the same reason.

If Yang Heewoon was next to him, Eunsoo worried he might harm him in his sleep.

Despite being four years older, having lived in the outside world, Yang Heewoon was neither experienced nor wise.

An adult getting overly excited about their first visit to an amusement park?

It was enough to make Eunsoo question what kind of life he’d been leading.

In every way, Yang Heewoon was an inferior human compared to Ye Eunsoo.

“Why does it have to be Yang Heewoon…”

The world revolves around those who have power—whether it’s wealth, fame, or ability.

The ones who possess these move the world.

The powerless must attach themselves to the powerful to keep the system going.

That’s the way the world works.

Even the Esper Bureau was like that.

They pulled every possible power play, yet when it came to Ye Eunsoo, who had no equal or substitute as a Guide, they couldn’t raise their noses in front of him.

Even that idiot who had abducted him—vile as his temper was—had become obsequious when it mattered, trying to sway Eunsoo with sly tricks but ultimately failing.

But Yang Heewoon… Yang Heewoon was always the exception.

It was always Eunsoo who was left wanting.

When he didn’t show up at the convenience store.

When Eunsoo begged for his life in the hospital.

When he saved Yang Heewoon on the day he moved.

When he stopped him from dying after his hair turned white from burnout.

And now.

* * *