* * *
I thought my heart was going to drop.
I almost screamed but barely managed to cover my mouth.
“Hyung.”
“…Uh, yeah? What is it?”
“Heewon… Hyung…”
For a moment, I thought he’d woken up, but no.
His voice was clear at first, but it quickly grew slurred.
He was still half-asleep, barely coherent.
He even rubbed his face against my hand.
So, he didn’t grab me out of irritation.
I unclenched the fist I’d made out of surprise and reached out, brushing my fingers lightly against Eunsoo’s face.
That’s when he pulled my palm to his lips and kissed it, over and over.
Even in his sleep, he was oddly fervent, though the kisses slowed as he drifted deeper into slumber.
Eventually, with his lips resting against my palm, he murmured,
“I’m sorry… I was wrong… But… I love you, Hyung… I love you so much…”
‘Feels like I’m the one who did something wrong.’
I’m the one who kissed him secretly and got caught, so why is Eunsoo the one apologizing?
Is he having a nightmare?
I don’t know the reason, but his voice was so heart-wrenching that his declaration of love made my heart skip a beat.
Instead of replying, I used my free hand to gently stroke his hair.
Soon, Eunsoo’s breathing evened out as he fell into a deep sleep.
When the grip on my wrist loosened, I carefully withdrew my hand.
“I feel the same.”
I couldn’t bring myself to use the exact words, “I love you.”
Once spoken aloud, I feared the emotions would become uncontrollable.
Even now, it feels unbearably embarrassing.
Eunsoo was asleep and didn’t hear me, but still.
I fled the room and collapsed onto the sofa.
After agonizing for a while, I finally gave in.
Pressing my lips to the spot on my palm where Eunsoo had kissed, I trembled at the memory of the warmth of his lips.
Satisfied yet overwhelmed by shame, I flopped back onto the sofa.
“What the hell am I doing…?”
I feel like a pervert.
I’m tormented by the thought that I’m doing things I shouldn’t be to Eunsoo.
‘It’s too early to confess, right?’
I spent five years searching every Gate for him, thinking I’d let my feelings go.
But if I confess just three days after finding him, even I’d be taken aback.
I need to wait for the right moment.
At least give it a week.
Maybe these feelings will subside by then, and I’ll sort myself out.
Eunsoo was greedy.
Even though he’d overslept, there was already plenty of food from yesterday’s grocery run, and it would’ve been fine to grill barbecue in the garden and order takeout to supplement.
But no—he insisted on making even more dishes himself.
“I know it sounds like too much, but if it’s them, they’ll eat everything. You know how much they can put away. And they’re going to drink too, aren’t they?”
Well, considering Rex alone could eat enough to practically empty out a restaurant when he set his mind to it, Eunsoo wasn’t wrong.
With his fast digestion, even if Rex couldn’t finish everything at once, he’d polish it off during the course of their conversations.
And when Eunsoo was this fired up with enthusiasm, trying to dissuade him was usually futile.
The real issue wasn’t Eunsoo’s zeal for preparing the party—it was the guilt I felt for having so little to contribute as the host.
“Hyung, can you help me with the cooking?”
“Can I?”
“Of course! I’d love it if you helped.”
“I’ll do it!”
Excited, I dashed over to Eunsoo’s side.
Most of what he needed me to do was simple: fetching utensils and ingredients, setting timers as instructed, stirring pots to prevent sticking, and taste-testing to check the seasoning.
But just being able to do something for Eunsoo made me happy.
Even though the tasks were straightforward, there were moments of crisis.
To be honest, they were more Eunsoo’s fault than mine.
“That’s not how you do it. You need to scrape along the bottom, like this. Yep, that’s better.”
Sometimes he’d half-embrace me from behind, leaning over my shoulder to inspect the food.
Maybe it was because he was so affectionate—he had a tendency to cling too much.
His hands, occasionally wandering to my waist or stomach, made me hyper-aware.
He was probably just trying to correct my posture, but my mind couldn’t help going to strange places.
‘His hands are so big and warm… It’d feel nice if he touched me more.’
I shut my eyes tightly at the errant thought.
Our sweet, innocent Eunsoo would never suspect I was having such improper ideas.
My conscience ached—badly.
‘If I mess this up, it’s going to get so awkward.’
As long as I harbored feelings for Eunsoo, staying in this house comfortably until he got married, as he’d suggested, wasn’t going to happen.
When I confess, I’ll need to be ready to leave.
For that, I had to get reinstated at work as soon as possible.
I needed money to get my own place.
Since the field operations team was short-staffed, maybe they’d have a spot for me.
I’d ask Cha Junseong about reinstatement when he arrived later.
“Hyung, everything’s almost done. You don’t need to help anymore. I’ll finish up, so go take a shower. You smell… delicious.”
“Oh…”
But instead of letting me go, Eunsoo wrapped his arms around my waist from behind, pulling me close. He leaned in, sniffing at my neck.
His breath tickled the back of my neck, sending shivers through me.
My muscles tensed involuntarily.
Each faint brush of his lips left me lightheaded. I was utterly at his mercy.
Blissfully unaware of my feelings, Eunsoo giggled and continued his playful antics.
“You smell good enough to eat. I want a bite.”
“Ah, no, don’t—”
“I’m holding back, you know. But isn’t just a taste okay?”
“No! Absolutely not…”
As Eunsoo’s teasing became more physical, I started trembling uncontrollably.
Now that Eunsoo was an Esper, if he decided to actually “taste” me—by licking, for instance—it would result in mucosal contact.
There was no way I could suppress my emotions, especially ones this intense, during mucosal contact with an Esper.
If this was payback for last night’s kiss on the neck, I had no defense.
I just wanted him to forgive me, please.
“Le-let go. Let me go, Eunsoo.”
“Why? You’re shaking so much… Oh, I’m sorry, it was just a joke.”
“I know it was a joke. I’ll go shower now.”
I fled to the shower on the second floor.
Scrubbing myself furiously, I tried to erase the memory of Eunsoo’s touch and his breath against my neck, but it was impossible.
And so, inevitably, I ended up… taking care of things.
“Haa…”
As I washed my hands, I sank into a deep, post-clarity daze.
How long had it been?
After going so long without, and being back here for such a short time, how had I gotten so worked up over an innocent gesture?
Worse, the person in my thoughts had been Eunsoo—the kid I’d practically raised, my lifesaver.
The self-loathing was overwhelming.
If I could dissolve into the water and disappear down the drain, I would.
‘Still… I feel kind of refreshed…’
There was a strange sense of detachment, the kind that only came after such moments.
It was better than before, at least.
Judging by the pattern so far, Eunsoo would keep touching me.
Rather than overreacting every time, wasn’t it better to just act normal now that I’d relieved some tension?
Trying to redirect my thoughts positively, I headed back downstairs.
My eyes widened as I took in the sight before me.
“Wow…”
The foldable dining table in the living room was crammed with dishes. It looked like the legs might give out under the weight.
It wasn’t just the quantity—it was the quality.
Each dish was impeccably made, the plating exquisite.
Anyone would’ve thought we’d hired a professional chef.
Eunsoo, always clever and skilled with his hands, had even learned cooking from Cha Junseong.
Clearly, he’d reached a whole new level beyond my expectations.
“This is amazing.”
“Hyung, go get changed. I prepared your clothes.”
How had he managed to prepare all this while also getting my clothes ready?
He didn’t have two bodies.
A fresh wave of guilt hit me.
While Eunsoo had been so productive, I’d been upstairs indulging in indecent thoughts.
“And Hyung, after you change, don’t forget to grab that thing. Just in case. It’s on the table.”
“Huh?”
What thing?
Puzzled, I went to change.
The new clothes fit perfectly, even though I hadn’t tried them on when we bought them.
Feeling lighter, I approached the table to pick up “that thing” Eunsoo mentioned.
But what I found there was beyond anything I could’ve imagined.
Condoms.
A box of condoms designed specifically for Espers and Guides, with anti-imprinting technology.
Not just one box—three.
My mind went completely blank.
“Wh-why is this here…”
* * *
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