* * *
This was the part where Eunsoo had the biggest clash with Cha Junseong in ‘The Genius Guide’s Melancholy’.
Even though they failed, Eunsoo felt deeply betrayed after deciding to imprint with Cha Junseong and sharing a physical connection, only to find out that his proposal for imprinting had been a form of escapism.
The betrayal Eunsoo felt upon learning the truth was indescribable. It reignited his trust issues, which had just started to settle.
Eunsoo, whose pride rivaled even Elliot’s, punched Cha Junseong in the face and severed ties immediately.
This was Eunsoo, who had only ever been sarcastic about the constant trolling from the Cha family.
Cha Junseong lowered.
His gaze again, avoiding my eyes.
The crease between his brows deepened.
“…I’m sorry.”
“I wasn’t saying this to hear an apology. Besides, it’s not like you directly asked me to imprint with you. But since this opportunity presented itself, think about it. What is truly important to you? And how can you protect that?”
As a reader of ‘The Genius Guide’s Melancholy’ and someone who cared for him, I selfishly wanted to tell him to cut ties with his family.
I wanted Cha Junseong to break free from the chains of his family.
To shake off those who were dragging him down and focus on his own life.
But Cha Junseong was an adult, and being swayed by his family was a choice he made himself.
I couldn’t force anything on him.
Still, the reason I was nagging this much was because I didn’t want Eunsoo to get caught up and hurt by Cha Junseong’s choices.
I couldn’t always be there to protect Eunsoo.
If he’s going to love my precious Eunsoo, I hope he makes a decision soon.
“Live selfishly, for your own happiness.”
“…”
“I’ve said everything I need to say. Now, I’m really going to sleep.”
Had I invalidated his entire life?
Cha Junseong looked deeply hurt.
But he still hadn’t let go of my hand.
I guess it’s okay to sleep like this?
I took a long breath and closed my eyes.
Having said everything I needed to, the exhaustion hit me all at once.
I slowly drifted into sleep.
“Yang Heewoon, I…”
Was it a dream?
As I was falling asleep, Cha Junseong said something.
I couldn’t hear what he said clearly, but one thing was certain.
It was a voice so sorrowful it resonated deeply within my chest.
As Cha Junseong watched the peacefully sleeping Yang Heewoon, he placed his hand over his eyes to shield him from the sunlight.
He reached out his thumb and touched those pale lips before pulling his hand away.
“Yang Heewoon, I…”
It had started as an impulsive action.
‘He may not have been the most skilled, but he tried his best. Just remember that, and he would be happy.’
He looked so sad when he said that, as if being forgotten was a given.
He wanted to show him how precious he truly was.
That it wasn’t about his rank but his very existence that mattered.
That’s why, in a moment of impulse, he had reached out and touched his collarbone, nearly asking him to imprint with him.
It had started that way, but as Junseong reflected on it, he became sure.
‘I was sincere.’
Cha Junseong wanted to imprint with Yang Heewoon.
“I’m not so petty that I would try to trap you in my life out of guilt or responsibility.”
When they’re together, he can’t help but glance his way, listen closely for his voice, and whenthey’re apart, he find himself missing his face.
When he’s close enough to reach, he want to hold his hand. He want to embrace him, kiss him.
More than the pleasure of guiding him as an esper, he enjoyed how Yang Heewoon focused solely on me during our sessions.
He hated that others desired him, despised it when they criticized him.
If possible, he wanted to keep him by his side.
He wanted to give him the best food, clothes, and a comfortable place to rest.
He couldn’t bear seeing him in pain, and he loathed seeing him cry.
That’s why he wanted him all to hinself.
Junseong wanted Heewon to look only at him.
Even though he knew it was just “work,” he hated seeing him guide anyone else.
If he had to put a name to these filthy, overwhelming emotions, there was only one word for it.
Love.
“I wanted to because… I love you.”
Yang Heewoon guided him despite knowing it was taking a toll on his body.
He even accepted and soothed the ugly emotions that caused Cha Junseong pain.
So, Junseong wanted to offer himself to Heewoon.
Though he had only caused Heewoon pain so far, once they imprinted, Heewoon wouldn’t suffer from guiding anymore.
While national guides are bound by restrictions in exchange for their benefits, imprinting offers a different fate.
Except in national emergencies, they wouldn’t have to guide other Espers, and even retirement is permitted.
Cha Junseong wanted to repay Heewoon for all the hardships he had endured.
He wanted to give Heewoon a new life, using everything he had.
But even though Junseong wanted to confess his love and persuade Heewoon, he couldn’t bring himself to do it, as Heewoon still misunderstood him.
“What did I do wrong?”
“Junseong, listen. I only did what was necessary for the Korean Esper community!”
“If Polwel was grabbed by the collar in Korea, what would they say over there? You know how much help the Bureau received from Polwel.”
“It was a bit harsh on a weak guide, but it was a mistake! They were the ones who first attempted violence!”
What had he said to his uncle, who brazenly yelled without a hint of remorse?
He hadn’t said a word he should have.
As an Esper who cared for guides and civilians, as the leader of Special A Team, and as a man in love with Yang Heewoon, there were things he should have said clearly.
Cha Junseong painfully closed his eyes and repeated Heewoon’s words over and over again.
“If I lived selfishly…”
When faced with the choice between the family that made him who he was and the person he loved, the direction happiness pointed to was clear.
He firmly held Yang Heewoon’s hand, which had gone limp in sleep.
When Elliott returned after being contacted to go on safari, he let out a dry laugh.
“Wow. The kids doubled.”
Eunsoo and Rex clearly had an amazing day at the amusement park.
Their hair was disheveled, and their clothes were messy.
Whatever they had done, it had been wild. Elliott’s use of the word “kids” was extreme, but it fit.
“And why is Heewoon so happy?”
Just as Elliott said, I was grinning widely.
Well, wasn’t it a nice sight?
Eunsoo had murky blue eyes, while Rex’s were a vivid blue.
Their eyes were similar in color, but Eunsoo’s were more delicate, while Rex had strong, masculine features.
Despite their differences and similarities, the pair fit perfectly together.
Eunsoo looked small now, almost like he could disappear into Rex’s arms, but in a couple of years, he would grow to fit comfortably by his side.
‘I miss them so much…’
In white suits, standing side by side, they would look stunning.
I wanted to give them a huge bouquet and bless their love—whether it was blue roses or hydrangeas, it didn’t matter.
Rex, who had been lost in his own thoughts, approached me.
“What’s with that weird face?”
“What face?”
“I don’t know. It’s hard to describe, but it annoys me.”
I was just smiling contentedly, so why did he feel annoyed?
But even with Rex’s grumbling, I couldn’t hide my growing happiness.
I tugged on his sleeve.
“Rex, wasn’t Eunsoo adorable and cute?”
“I don’t know. Heewoon, I’m exhausted. I wanted to see you, but I had to spend time with him, and that made me miss you even more.”
He must have been truly worn out.
Without asking for permission, he leaned in to kiss me.
I turned my head to avoid it and burst out laughing.
“Stop saying mean things. Eunsoo is adorable, right? his smile is cute, his pouty lips are cute, and he’s the most lovable person in the world, right?”
“Hey, you…”
“Even though Eunsoo can’t guide right now, once he can, you’ll feel even better. I hope he regains his ability soon…”
“Heewoon…”
Rex, who had missed his chance to kiss me, sighed deeply, visibly frustrated, and frowned.
“I’m only being nice because you care about him. That brat…”
“Oh.”
It seemed Rex still wasn’t fond of Eunsoo.
‘Well, I am the one who’s in love right now…’
Eunsoo was still underage, and Rex might not see him that way yet.
But that’s okay.
If Rex is being nice because of me, that’s not so bad.
As long as I could be a positive link between the two, that was enough.
‘Anyway, I’ll die soon and disappear from this dynamic.’
After that, things would return to normal.
I smiled again.
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