QHIM chapter 9- Fake Miracle

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That night, I wrote my will.

It seemed better to die at my most beautiful rather than be dragged to the Waverly asylum, tortured, meet Jerome and be raped, and ultimately be beheaded.

After writing the will, I twisted a curtain into a rope.

My eyes were so swollen from crying all night that I could barely open them.

I tied the curtain to the hook in the wardrobe and climbed onto a chair. After taking a deep breath, I muttered to myself.

“Jeanne, don’t hate me. I didn’t just know the original story—I wrote it. It’s better to die now while you’re still at peace.”

I placed the rope around my neck and took a deep breath. Despite my resolve to die, fear suddenly crept in. My lower lip trembled as I hung my head.

Why did I have to possess Jeanne? Wasn’t it enough that I was unhappy in my past life? A wave of anger surged within me.

“No, wait. Why should I die?”

I hadn’t even tried ogre meat, which was considered a delicacy in this world, nor did I know what slime felt like.

And I hadn’t even met the dragon, and I hadn’t seen the flower of the world of legends!

“…I’ll just go to the asylum.”

Who knows? Even though they torture you, maybe the hospital food tastes good. Just as I was about to abandon my resolve to die, the door creaked open. It was the maid, arriving at the worst possible time.

“Lady Jeanne!”

Startled by her scream, I slipped. The horrible sensation of the rope tightening around my neck made me kick and struggle. The maid, on the verge of tears, ran over and grabbed my legs.

I heard someone running up the stairs. Gasping for breath, the person who came in was none other than Cedric.

“Untie the rope first.”

Cedrick calmly commanded as he took me from the maid’s arms. The maid frantically climbed onto the chair to untie the rope.

As my consciousness began to fade, my eyes met Cedric’s.

His face, usually full of arrogance, was now paler than ever. As soon as the maid untied the rope, I fell limply into Cedrick’s arms.

Cedrick, who caught me just in time, fell backward. I felt his arms tightly wrapped around my waist. As he sighed, Cedrick spoke to the maid.

“You may leave now.”

“……”

“And.”

Cedrick called out to the maid, who was hurriedly leaving the room. She turned back, trembling with fear.

Instinctively, my eyes shifted toward Cedric’s face. I was curious about what expression he was making now.

But before I could see, Cedrick pressed my head firmly against his chest as if to prevent me from looking.

“I’m warning you, if you go around talking about what you saw today, it won’t end with just a scolding.”

“……”

“Do you understand?”

“Yes, I understand.”

As soon as I heard his voice, I was sure of it. Cedrick was furious right now. At this point, I couldn’t tell if he was naturally a hot-tempered person or if Jeanne just had a special way of getting under his skin.

After the maid left, a strange silence settled in the bedroom. Cedrick picked up my will, which had fallen on the floor.

“Look at this, you even went as far as writing a will?”

Cedrick let out a hollow laugh as if he couldn’t believe it. Meanwhile, I trembled like a leaf in relief at having survived.

Having come so close to death, I no longer cared about pride. I grabbed Cedrick by the collar and poured out all the thoughts I had been holding back.

“Let me stay here. I won’t show my face again. I’ll eat alone in my room. I’ll live quietly as if I’m dead.”

“……”

“I know you don’t like me. You don’t even have to treat me like a person. I’ll just live here like a decorative plant… Please, just let me stay here. I’m begging you.”

I was too hysterical to keep up the proud act of Jeanne anymore. The fear I had been suppressing exploded all at once. Cedrick tilted his head slightly.

“If you stay here, then what?”

Cedrick grabbed my wrist and roughly rolled up my sleeve. Startled by his sudden action, I tried to pull back but hesitated. Countless scars marked my wrist.

‘These are…’

In this world, there was little knowledge about depression. Since the concept of an Asylum was only recently introduced, the treatments were bound to be barbaric.

As soon as I saw the numerous scars on me wrist, it struck me that maybe Cedrick had considered committing Jeanne to a psychiatric ward with a certain rationale in mind.

I had been so focused on the original story that I hadn’t even considered the intentions of the supporting characters. Cedrick spoke calmly to me, who was too shocked to say anything.

“This is the third time I’ve witnessed your suicide attempt. I’m tired of saving someone who constantly wants to die. The life that Marie lost so tragically… you’re trying to give up with your own hands.”

Cedrick gently brushed his thumb over the scars on my wrist. His tender touch felt out of place with his indifferent expression, making the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.

“You think I hate you because you’re a fake, because you’re adopted? No.”

As he finished speaking, Cedrick pulled me closer to him. The sudden closeness made my eyes widen.

“I hate the way you stubbornly stick to that method—just as a role.”

Cedrick roughly threw my wrist aside and stood up. I could only stare blankly at his back as he left the bedroom.

‘…I see. So it’s not because Jeanne is a fake or an adopted child that he dislikes her.’

It made sense that Jeanne would seem distasteful to Cedrick. The life that Marie had so desperately wished for… Jeanne had tried to throw away several times with his own hands.

Discovering a suicide attempt so soon after losing Marie must have been a tremendous mental burden for Cedrick.

If he really hated and resented Jeanne, he would have kicked him out of the house long ago.

But instead of heartlessly throwing him out, Cedrick sought his own way of solving the problem. With so many thoughts swirling in my mind, I finally reached a conclusion.

“…I can’t die just yet.”

I clenched my fists and stood up. Standing before the mirror, I tidied my disheveled hair into a neat bun.

The fear that had haunted my face since the day I possessed this body was now replaced by a different emotion.

“I won’t solve this the easy way.”

The word “Sacre” translated into the Empire’s language as “wild dog.” The Sacres were said to be named after the trait of wild dogs that would continue to bite even if their heads were cut off.

As the name suggests, they were an independent and resilient people. They didn’t easily yield to any hardship.

And so, I had no choice but to believe in it now.

That somewhere within Jeanne’s soul, the spirit of the Sacre remained.

✽ ✽ ✽

After finally pulling myself together, I left the bedroom. As I walked down the hallway, I heard some murmuring voices.

“We’re so lucky. Both the Duke and the Young Duke are such handsome men. How fortunate we are to serve them.”

“Ah, whether it’s the Duke or the Young Duke, how wonderful it would be to spend a lifetime with them. But someone like me wouldn’t even catch their eye…”

I saw a group of maids huddled by the window, their faces flushed. They looked like high school girls swooning over a handsome substitute teacher.

One particularly young-looking maid spoke in a sulky tone.

“But compared to them, Lady Jeanne… Honestly, don’t you think she’s a bit plain? I mean, she’s cute, but there’s something off-putting about her eyes. And she’s got that gloomy aura.”

She wasn’t entirely wrong. Jeanne was beautiful, but her rebellious gaze didn’t lend her a gentle image.

You could say she had a face that wouldn’t pass a matchmaking meeting.

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