* * *

[January 20, cold weather, but clear.

Today, we terminated our contract with the company. Thanks to my uncle, it went smoothly. And! He said he’d make sure Lee Jihyun can’t bother Donghwa anymore.

When Donghwa silently endured the bullying alone at the company, I thought he was strong, but he had a softer side. That’s probably why he collapsed.

Even during trainee days, I wanted to befriend him, but his cold demeanor made me hesitate. But once we talked, he didn’t seem as cold.

We ate together for the second time today! I’m glad our tastes match. There’s no way anyone hates pork cutlet and mushrooms. He doesn’t seem to eat much, though. By the way, what on earth is Wiener schnitzel? I need to find out later.

(Skip)

If we keep this up, we might get closer. Hopefully, we both survive the survival show and debut together.

I joined GOD Entertainment on my uncle’s advice, but it wasn’t the best company for debuting. I stayed for my uncle, but Donghwa should debut in a bigger company.

But why was Donghwa at our company?]

Chae Hamin paused his journal and thought of Ji Donghwa.

First, dancing. He’s shorter but has a balanced body and graceful lines, making him elegant.

Next, singing. He has a clean, resonant voice that’s pleasant to listen to. He might not be top-tier solo material, but he has enough skill to be a lead vocalist. His vocal range is narrow, but his voice was unique.

Lastly, his appearance. He has the kind of look that fans will love, calling him a chic cat.

Although he might appear a bit sharp when expressionless, there will definitely be fans who like that aspect of him too. After all, he’s fundamentally good-looking, so it’s just a matter of taste.

If only his memory would come back properly, he could compose and arrange music as well. Judging by how the kids in the practice room curse while learning composition, it seems like he’s quite skilled.

Why Stay?

Looking at it this way, he’s almost a complete trainee. So why did he persist in our company to debut, enduring all that harsh bullying?

Maybe… it’s because his desire to debut was so strong.

As he concluded his thoughts, he couldn’t help but get angry thinking about the former company trainees who made him quit.

***
“Idol? Ha, really.”

I had no choice but to calm my anger as I got dressed.

Having repeatedly fallen asleep and woken up for the past 15 days, I now accepted that this wasn’t a dream. The long, lingering doubts were finally put to rest.

Yes, this is reality.

The reality where everything I achieved up to the age of twenty-nine has disappeared.

My novels written since university, the books that filled two walls of my room, all gone.

‘…Calm down.’

To be honest, right after canceling my contract with the previous company, I considered turning off my phone and disappearing.

I didn’t want to do it, but I also doubted whether participating in the survival competition was the right thing to do.

Entering the survival competition would mean taking a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity from someone else.

So, five days ago, while seriously contemplating escape, this damned intelligent lifeform stopped me.

‘Quest confirmation.’

[Emergency Quest: ‘You can’t run away anymore!’
You are currently six months behind on your rent. With your remaining balance, you can’t even pay a quarter of it.
Your landlord is planning to evict and sue you.
Complete this quest and receive the reward.
Completion condition: Follow Chae Hamin and participate in the survival competition.
Reward: Six months’ overdue rent plus an additional two months’ rent, totaling 5 million won.
Note! If you quit halfway or intentionally ruin the performance to get eliminated, the reward will be revoked!]

Every time I see this quest window, I can’t help but sigh.

From the moment this quest appeared, my phone started receiving angry messages from my landlord.

‘…I can’t believe I owe 5 million won in rent. I couldn’t have been living so recklessly.’

I’m curious about where and how ‘I’ squandered all the money I saved from part-time jobs since middle school, resulting in six months of overdue rent, and why the landlord put up with it.

Even more absurdly, I’ve supposedly been living in this house since high school, which I got after establishing myself as a novelist?

I quickly checked my bank account balance. …50,000 won. It should have been much more than this, for sure.

I’d never live like this if it were really me.

…Could that strange intelligent lifeform have tampered with things?

Suppressing my suspicions, I asked the entity watching me.

‘…Question, if I get eliminated due to lack of skill, will the reward still be revoked?’

[No, it won’t be.]

…Alright, I’ll participate.

I can’t find 5 million won anywhere right now, and it’s better to join the survival competition, get the rent, and get eliminated than to owe money.

It’s the most reasonable choice available.

Since I don’t have the talent to become an idol, I’m sure I’ll get eliminated, so it should be fine.

Today, the day I go to Nietzsche Entertainment with Chae Hamin, is the day I receive my report card after practicing for the audition for the past four days.

I prepared as best as I could because I might not get the rent if I get criticized for being unprepared.

…I worked pretty hard, so it might feel a little sad if I get eliminated.

I put on a gray knit sweater, a black jacket, and black slacks.

I don’t know if it looks good, but I wanted to make a neat impression.

‘Seeing how they’re forcing me to participate in the survival competition… I guess the main quest is resolved there.’

With doubts lingering, I left the house.

***

Meeting Chae Hamin, 25 Minutes Before the Audition

Arriving in front of Nietzsche Entertainment 25 minutes before the audition, Chae Hamin waved at me. What’s making him so happy that he keeps grinning like that?

“Donghwa! This is the first time I’ve seen you in casual clothes instead of training outfit. You dressed well.”

Even as a trainee, I must have lived like that.

Chae Hamin was dressed in a flashy street fashion with a hoodie, layered shirts, and leather jeans. In other words, he looked like a delinquent.

But his face is anything but a delinquent’s; it’s just a gentle rabbit, creating a subtle imbalance.

It’s like a child pretending to be scary while threatening to give them candy.

I need to be sociable… since he complimented me first.

“…You dressed well too.”

Chae Hamin laughed brightly and grabbed my arm, pulling me inside, saying we should go in quickly. This seems to be a habit.

With one arm held by Chae Hamin, I followed him into the Nietzsche Entertainment building.

“Hello, we’re here for the audition.”

When Chae Hamin greeted cheerfully, the receptionist told us to wait a moment while she made a call.

Soon, a man approached us and greeted us.

“Hello. I’m Kang Seungwon from the management team.”

He had the appearance of a polite salaryman, looking to be in his early thirties.

“As you’ve heard, this audition is to select trainees to fill the vacant spots in the debut survival competition. Over the past week, a total of 10 people have auditioned, and you two are the last participants. Out of the 12, only two will join the survival competition.”

Chae Hamin and I nodded slightly at the mechanical explanation.

“There are over 20 minutes left until the audition, so please wait while warming up in the practice room next to the audition room. I’ll guide you.”

Following Kang Seungwon’s guidance, Chae Hamin and I entered the practice room and started warming up.

As I was warming up my voice and taking out my earphones, Chae Hamin asked me.

“Donghwa, what song did you bring for the vocal performance today?”

“…An original song.”

“Oh, why?”

“Because it’s good.”

It’s true.

Determined to participate in the survival competition to the best of my ability, I started to identify what I could do well.

In the process, I discovered that I had knowledge of harmony and instruments, which I had never learned, filling my mind as if it was natural.

Being able to compose or arrange music is a significant advantage for a trainee, so I thought it would be a good idea to bring an original song to the survival audition.

So I picked one of the songs that the previous ‘me’ had created, and since using it as is would prick my conscience, I made some arrangements.

The result was quite good.

Chae Hamin, intrigued by my confident response, pointed at the earphones I was wearing and asked if he could listen. There’s no reason not to.

“It’s just the instrumental, is that okay?”

“Hmm, then I’ll just listen during the audition.”

Chae Hamin responded with a somewhat regretful expression.

“If you had asked me to sing, it would be different, but given the flow of this conversation, it’s a bit awkward to sing now.”

I nodded slightly and played the MR, silently mouthing the lyrics.

* * *

“Please, please let this audition go well! The candidates looked decent on paper, so please, God!”

Jang Haejin, the team leader of the 2nd Planning Team at Nietzsche Entertainment, prayed sincerely. Until two months ago, things had been fine.

Negotiations with the broadcaster had gone smoothly, and they had selected the ten most talented individuals. She thought that once the survival show started, everything would sail smoothly.

But no one knew that two of the ten oars on the boat would be rotten. This boat required all ten to row!

With only about a week left until the practice sessions were to be filmed, upper management even suggested filling the slots with anyone, regardless of skill.

“All those late nights I spent planning this, no way.”

But she knew. If things continued like this, they’d have no choice but to accept anyone, regardless of her late-night efforts.

Hence, the participants in this audition had to be skilled.

“GOD is not dead. GOD is not dead. Nietzsche was wrong. So please…”

The vocal trainer looked at her with a tired expression as she clasped her hands tightly and bowed her head.

“It’s time. Let’s start the audition.”

At the words of the head of the rookie scouting team, Jang Haejin raised her head. She carefully examined the two people entering through the door.

“At least they look good.”

One had a rabbit-like face and the other a cat-like one, both of which were sure to appeal to idol fans. The two stopped at a suitable distance in the middle of the audition room and greeted.

She quickly turned her eyes to the camera screen.

“They look good on camera too…!”

At least their faces passed. In this industry, looks are a skill too. She smiled and asked,

“Both of you are from the same company, right?”

“Yes! We’re from GOD Entertainment, though you might not know it.”

The gentler-looking one replied.

His name was Chae Hamin, and the one beside him was Ji Donghwa.

“Actually, your background doesn’t matter as long as you have the skills. Chae Hamin, we’ll start with you. Let’s begin with the song.”

As Chae Hamin took a step forward, Ji Donghwa moved aside and sat in the prepared seat.

“Are you ready?”

Seeing Chae Hamin nod, Jang Haejin signaled to play the song.

A rather familiar piano intro played.

“He must be weak in high notes.”

Having been in this company for years, she could easily understand the intent behind the song choice.

Avoiding the weakness of high notes and choosing a song that focuses on basic skills showed that he was at least aware of his abilities.

She stopped the song after the first verse. It was decent but just that.

“Now let’s see your dance. Do you need time to warm up?”

“No, I’ll go right away!”

The next song was the debut song of their company’s group, TOT.

Known for its intense choreography, it featured a rebellious school senior concept that gained some popularity. It seemed like he even coordinated his outfit to match.

Chae Hamin started moving to the beat, loosening up. He combined the main dancer lines with center parts seamlessly.

His isolation technique was excellent, and he drew attention with his precise hand movements.

Yet, his relaxed expression and steady gaze conveyed comfort. At the climax of the song, where he bent his body backward with a wave, she couldn’t help but be impressed.

“His skill and expression…”

During the wave, Chae Hamin smiled playfully and tilted his head slightly to the right, perfectly capturing the song’s concept.

The transition back to a serious expression in the following movements was flawless. Solid basics, eye-catching dance lines, and overflowing charisma.

She naturally thought he should be the main dancer.

As the song neared its end, he continued the detailed movements, stretching his back and slowly turning his head toward her.

Jang Haejin quietly murmured,

“GOD is… not dead…”

* * *