* * *
Joel could tell just by looking at his own experience.
Even his birth father, who in real life had a bushy beard and looked like a bandit or a woodcutter, looked like a gentle middle-aged gentleman with intellectual refinement in his portrait.
Therefore, Joel, born a minor country noble and having never seen the Crown Prince in person, could only conclude that the portrait was heavily idealized.
However, in the case of Crown Prince Carlyle, the opposite was true.
Even the court painter, who clearly possessed considerable skill, had failed to fully capture the Crown Prince’s handsomeness on canvas.
The Crown Prince possessed an extraordinarily striking appearance, like a masterpiece sculpted by God with the utmost care.
It was shocking how perfectly flawless every part of his face was, from his elegantly sculpted nose to his earnest and calm eyes.
The Crown Prince, with his jet-black hair slicked back neatly, was wearing a dark-colored uniform, and with his already sturdy build and the uniform on, he looked so mature that it was hard to believe he was only seventeen, like Joel.
It was only natural that Joel would be completely mesmerized when the blindingly beautiful appearance of the Crown Prince suddenly filled his eyes.
Joel—without even realizing the rudeness he was committing—stared into the kindly sparkling green eyes of the Crown Prince and thought quickly to himself.
‘Is it proper etiquette to kneel when meeting a member of the Imperial Family? No, that’s for Betas, I think Omegas are supposed to curtsy slightly. Which is right? What should I do right now?’
But no matter how much he wracked his brain, he couldn’t recall any of the rules the etiquette tutor had taught him.
Joel, who had been staring at the Crown Prince’s face with his mouth wide open for a while, could only squeeze out a single word.
“Y-Your Highness, the Crown Prince.”
At that, the Crown Prince smiled faintly.
His slightly revealed teeth were white and even.
He kissed the back of Joel’s hand and asked, “I have been abroad for a long time, so I have been indifferent to the news of the social circles. I see a new face; may I be blessed with the name of this beauty?”
And when Joel stammered out his name.
“Then you are… the one Count Lucas adopted?”
The Crown Prince’s face hardened after hearing Joel’s name.
The gentle smile that had rested on his lips was nowhere to be found.
Joel realized that it wasn’t just kindness that had disappeared from the Crown Prince’s now cold eyes—he couldn’t even find the slightest bit of respect for him.
The Crown Prince’s chilly gaze resembled the looks of other noble children who loved to comment haughtily on his reckless behaviour.
It was almost an instinctive realization.
“Then I must go now. You don’t need to return the handkerchief.”
The Crown Prince turned his back, not even bothering to hide his expression of regret at having bothered to speak to him.
In that brief moment, when the polite gaze coldly transformed, Joel read every thought that went through the Crown Prince’s mind.
The Crown Prince had judged him in a matter of seconds based solely on rumors, just like the other nobles.
This happened to be the exact moment he had fallen for the Prince at first sight.
It was unfair and infuriating to suffer this insult simply because he was an adopted child and had a bad reputation.
He had experienced similar things countless times over the past two months, but this time he truly couldn’t stand it.
He wanted to retrieve the affection that had vanished in an instant.
So Joel immediately chased after the Crown Prince—and grabbed the sleeve of his coat.
“No, you can’t leave like this.”
Joel’s wounded eyes sparkled with a fierce light.
The Crown Prince couldn’t hide his astonishment at Joel’s rudeness in daring to look at a member of the Imperial Family with such insolent eyes.
Should he call this foolishness or bravery?
The Prince shook his arm with displeasure, as if he were shaking off a beggar who was clinging to his sleeve, but Joel only gripped his sleeve tighter, clinging on like a barnacle.
“What sort of rudeness is this? Let go immediately!”
“No, I won’t. And if we’re talking about rudeness, Your Highness is no better. What is the problem with me being Count Lucas’ adopted son that makes you treat me so carelessly?”
“Carelessly? Honestly, you are as self-willed as the rumours claim.”
One corner of the Crown Prince’s mouth curled up gracefully in a sneer.
Watching that expression, Joel felt his heart ache sharply.
It was an undisguised mockery.
His impulsive act of grabbing him abruptly, driven by a desire to protest, had only served to reinforce the Prince’s prejudice against him.
He shouldn’t have thrown a tantrum that would only have worked on Baron Bennet’s estate, especially not in front of a member of the Imperial Family—but by the time Joel realized his mistake, it was too late.
Taking advantage of the slight loosening of Joel’s fingers, the Crown Prince heartlessly shook off his arm.
“I hope I don’t run into you here again. This is my private library, and it’s not a place where common nobles can freely enter and exit. I don’t particularly like having my private rest time disturbed.”
Smoothing out his wrinkled sleeve, the Crown Prince added, “Of course, I assume you are not unaware of that fact.”
His manner suggested that Joel had intentionally been putting on a tearful act here to gain his attention.
But Joel swore before God that he had merely stumbled upon this place while looking for a secluded spot.
He hadn’t even known that the Crown Prince had returned to the country.
Even though he had already left the worst first impression on the Crown Prince, Joel quickly made an excuse, unable to let him misunderstand further.
“I apologize. I-I didn’t know this was Your Highness’s library. I was just, by chance, looking for a place where there were no people…”
However, the Crown Prince was already walking away quickly.
He did not want to waste another second on Joel.
Left alone and isolated in the forest, Joel felt a sense of humiliation that surpassed mere futility.
If he hadn’t fallen in love with the Crown Prince, the Prince would have been just one of the many unlucky individuals surrounding him after that day.
Then, he wouldn’t have been so hurt by his heartlessness, but sadly, Joel had already lost his heart to the Crown Prince.
Joel never forgot the gentle first impression of the Crown Prince after that.
But cruelly, the Crown Prince never showed him that side again.
The only person he ever showed that gentle and kind attitude to was Benjamin.
The Crown Prince, who was always kind and polite in front of Benjamin, always treated Joel with nothing but indifference.
He didn’t openly express contempt for Joel like the other nobles, but he never stepped forward to help him either.
He merely maintained a thoroughly passive attitude throughout the years of continued bullying.
Joel always believed that the space he occupied in the Crown Prince’s mind was no different from a mere decorative object in the hallway.
Always present, but not particularly noticed; the kind of thing that, if removed by the butler one day, would only elicit a brief thought of, ‘Ah, that was there,’ but no real sense of loss.
That was why, when he was caught frantically stuffing food into his mouth with his bare hands, Joel expected the Crown Prince to scold him.
He wouldn’t have been surprised even if the Prince had shown blatant contempt, such as turning his head and covering his mouth to suppress a gag.
But the reaction the Crown Prince displayed at that moment was completely unexpected.
[Oh dear, did the bear not harm you?]
Far from ridiculing him, the Crown Prince kindly played along with his obvious lie.
Furthermore, he even made a fuss, bringing him digestive medicine and massaging his hands and feet, clearly worried that he might choke.
Joel simply couldn’t adjust to the Crown Prince’s consistently kind attitude, even when he had committed an act that deserved contempt.
It seemed that his head injury from the stone that day had truly messed something up.
Joel thought he must check the Crown Prince’s head immediately upon returning to the Imperial Palace, and he urged the Crown Prince, who was trying to delay their departure, to get into the carriage.
Since the carriage departed, Joel had been looking out the window with a perpetually gloomy face.
As if to distract him, the Crown Prince subtly initiated a conversation.
“You, you claim to like jewelry, yet your adornments are quite modest.”
In truth, the Crown Prince was even feeling jealous that Joel’s gaze was directed elsewhere than at him.
Jealousy was one thing, but he was also a little curious as to why Joel, who his stepfather claimed loved jewelry so much, wasn’t wearing any proper accessories.
* * *
Ah
Thank you
Our Joel.. you are strong dear