* * *

“What the hell…?”

Instinctively, I tried to shove him off, but his arms were wrapped around me so tightly that no matter how hard I pushed, he didn’t budge.

When I glanced up, I saw his peaceful, sleeping face and swallowed a few curses.

How can he hold me so calmly like this?

I had a lot to say, but when it came time to wake him, no words came out.

“…Damn it.”

The first thought in my head wasn’t one of gratitude but resentment for how late he had arrived.

He acted as if he’d give me his all, like he couldn’t live without me, laying traps upon traps to draw me in.

Yet, when I was on the verge of a real crisis, where the hell was he, crawling in so late?

I could have really died.

And I truly thought I was going to.

If I wanted to vent my frustrations, I’d have to first acknowledge something—I’d been relying on him.

I’d been depending on him.

Admitting that felt like a part of me, one that I’d denied for so long, was about to snap.

Why?

I was never someone who relied on others.

That had been my way of protecting myself even before living as Jurgen.

People always make selfish choices.

Just like how I help others ultimately for my own gain, everyone makes decisions that best benefit them.

How many people speak like they mean something, only to flip their words as easily as turning their hand?

It’s tiring how unchanging they are, yet the moment you open your heart, they change.

That’s why I can’t trust anyone with my affairs.

The moment I make an exception, the solid ground beneath me would crumble.

Especially if the person who pushed me into this mess in the first place was Hernan?

There was no way I could feel safe or trust him either.

“……”

But Hernan really did come to save me.

The reason I woke up this fine was entirely because he found me in time.

Could I really trust him?

Could I rely on him?

As my heart pounded, I felt his heartbeat echoing through our skin.

“I…”

I was confused.

If I admitted that Hernan was someone I could trust, I’d also have to accept that I had been arrogant.

Perhaps he wasn’t as much of a bastard as I had been so wary of.

Maybe he really was someone who could help me. I couldn’t deny that anymore.

And if that were the case, one question still lingered.

“Why…?”

I wasn’t naive enough to believe in love at first sight.

It made more sense to think that he stood to gain more than he was investing in me.

But even though I hadn’t known him long, I could tell that Hernan wasn’t someone obsessed with material gain.

Even if helping me benefited his estate, it didn’t make sense.

How could someone so interested in me be so oblivious to the disaster unfolding in his own lands?

No matter how much I dissected and doubted him, I came to one conclusion.

“It’s almost like he actually… loves me.”

Why?

Out of all the countless people, why me?

There are plenty of others who are more handsome, prettier, and perfect.

Why is he so focused on me, especially when he has a destined partner waiting for him?

Unexplained motives and emotions scare me because they can shift without warning.

That’s why I still couldn’t trust him.

Yet if I said that I wanted to trust him, even just a little bit…

“I must be losing it…”

Still trapped in Hernan’s embrace, I raised my head to look at his face.

Smooth skin without a blemish, soft, gently curved eyes, messy bangs, a rounded forehead, and plump lips.

Everything about him screamed conventional attractiveness.

There must be countless people out there who would sing his praises just based on his looks alone.

I couldn’t understand why someone like him, who could be adored by so many, would lower himself over and over again just to want someone like me.

“Strange man…”

Strange, strange, and stranger still.

I was so lost staring at his face that I didn’t even notice how close it had gotten.

“…!!??”

Finally, our lips brushed, his soft lower lip pressing against mine.

I let out a shriek and shot up, shoving Hernan off the bed.

“…!? …??”

Hernan, who had been sleeping soundly, rolled off the bed and woke up, staring at me in confusion.

He looked utterly baffled—and rightfully so.

He’d been sleeping like a doll, completely motionless. I was the one who had moved.

He had no idea what had just happened.

“What’s going on all of a sudden…?”

Without even offering an apology, I bolted from the bed, still in shock, and ran out into the hallway without any explanation.

I was clearly out of my mind.

People tend to do crazy things after they escape a near-death experience.

I must have temporarily lost it after being pushed to the edge of fear.

Admitting that my reluctance to accept Hernan wasn’t based on any logical reasoning but rather my own emotions would leave me with no escape, like a cornered rat in a trap.

My heart raced like a guilty child hiding a mistake.

I had to stay out of sight until I could calm down.

This was so unlike me.

---

A week had passed since the whole incident, and the turmoil in my head over how to face Hernan had been solved in an unexpected way.

“Starting today, I’ll be visiting you in place of His Grace at 9 p.m. each night.”

Hernan, who had once seemed to have endless free time, was now so busy he couldn’t even turn off the lights at night.

At first, I thought it was just an excuse.

But after slipping in and out of the office, pretending to give reports, I confirmed it wasn’t a lie—his workload had drastically increased.

“Well… considering the huge audit he initiated, it makes sense.”

Even with the help of his unofficial proxy, Ryuudene, the sheer volume of reports was overwhelming.

He was working so much that he had no time for anything else.

On top of that, lords whose reports had been rejected were coming in droves to request an audience.

Even though Hernan was selective about who he met, he still had to give the regional leaders their chance to explain, which consumed even more time.

“Being in a high position isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.”

Nirvan may have a large economy, but it’s relatively small and peaceful, so we don’t have to deal with headaches like this.

When I think about it, having such a high rank isn’t always a good thing. I clicked my tongue like I was talking about someone else, but I was just as swamped.

I briefly hoped that with everything going on, I might be able to get rid of the ban on working late. But instead of easing restrictions, a new watchdog was sent to keep an eye on me.

“I’m Anton Cornus. Please, feel free to call me Anton.”

True to the typical Northern warrior, his broad frame and rugged face gave an imposing first impression.

However, in contrast to his appearance, he introduced himself with a light and laid-back tone.

He mentioned being the fourth son of the Baron of Cornus.

Like other minor noble families with too many children, his birth order left him far from any real power within the family.

Early on, he chose to look beyond family loyalty and ventured outward.

“Thinking about it, that’s a rational choice.”

It’s better to be knighted and gain recognition through achievements than to live as a useless parasite at home.

While the former guarantees an easy life, the latter is a risky path that could lead to a hard life or even death at the hands of monsters.

But Anton’s sturdy appearance seemed to justify his bold decision.

Though, if there was an issue, it was that he looked more like a rough mercenary than a refined noble.

“Well… It’s not like I have to stare at his face while working.”

I didn’t really care.

My only concern was whether he’d have the flexibility to turn a blind eye to my overtime.

Unfortunately, despite his casual speech and attitude, his strict knightly discipline shattered my hopes.

* * *