* * *
“Oh, that reminds me. There was a story going around online today about an unusual Hunter.”
“An unusual Hunter? Like what?”
“Apparently, he wears a full mask that completely hides his face and covers himself head to toe, kind of gives off superhero vibes. He seems strong, but no one knows who he is.”
“Come on. Really? There’s no way someone like that exists. Sounds made up.”
“It’s real. He saved a mom and her kid who got caught up in a Gate incident. Didn’t even stick around for a reward—she was the one who reported it.”
“Huh…? Weird guy, but sounds like a good person.”
He was like someone straight out of my own head—bringing to life the ideal hero I always dreamed of.
Someone who, after all those years in the hospital, brought color back into a life that had been drained into endless grayscale.
Someone who made me excited to live today, to look forward to tomorrow, just by giving me someone to cheer for and wait for.
Someone who gave me hope in the outside world, letting me dream of a brighter future.
Someone who… helped me hold on until the day I finally awakened and re-entered the world.
That person—my hero—was now telling me I was special.
“I-it was… my first time too. A kiss…”
“I see.”
One step. My hero took another step closer to me.
Just like when he’d shielded me with his umbrella—close enough that our toes nearly touched.
Then his hand reached out.
A large hand gently cupped my chin, and his thumb brushed my lips.
I remember thinking, ‘His thumb feels so hot.’
Even though he was wearing gloves, and I knew it wasn’t his bare skin—still, it felt warm.
It shouldn’t have, but it did.
“I’m happy.”
Ah. Yeah. I must’ve been broken.
Feeling heat from a gloved hand was already strange enough, but the moment he smiled, my brain went completely blank.
I felt dizzy—my legs nearly gave out.
Barely holding myself together, I asked:
“Um… y-you’re a man, right, Hunter?”
“Yes. Is that a problem?”
“N-no! I, I just…”
I clenched my fists tightly.
It was time to look at myself honestly and accept it.
“I don’t mind.”
I knew it now.
There was no denying it.
I was gay.
At the very least, I was someone who could feel romantic and sexual attraction toward a man.
There was no other way to explain how fluttery and drawn I felt to this guy.
Thinking back, even the kiss dream I’d had—it was with someone much taller and broader than me.
Big hands that could cover my entire face, gently stroking my head and cheeks.
Was it that I liked people bigger than me?
Or… had the person I kissed in that dream been this “gray coat” man?
Since I didn’t know his face, even if I had opened my eyes in that dream, I wouldn’t have seen anything.
Maybe that’s why I’d jolted awake right then.
“B-but I’m a guy too…”
“I know.”
“And… is that okay with you?”
“I don’t really know… but you’re okay.”
“……”
Even though his voice was monotone and robotic, somehow it sounded unbearably sweet.
Like he was saying—you are special.
That maybe… he even had romantic feelings for me.
‘…Why, though?’
Rationally, I couldn’t quite understand why he liked me.
How well did he even know me to say all these kind things?
Sure, love sometimes strikes like lightning, but it’s not like I made some amazing first impression.
To Gray Coat, the first time we met, I was just some weird kid dragging himself around a hospital hallway full of monster corpses, holding onto a wheelchair.
Then I passed out almost immediately.
And the second time, at Wind Hole, I looked like a wreck.
Covered in dust, in ragged clothes, stained with blood here and there.
We hadn’t even had a proper conversation.
It was mostly me rambling, then we kissed, and that was it.
And it wasn’t even a good kiss.
I was stiff and awkward, just barely trying to keep up.
Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if a kiss could earn someone’s affection like that.
I had all this admiration and memory built up around him as a Hunter, but he didn’t have that with me.
“Ah…”
Lost in my thoughts, I suddenly realized—his fingers were still on my lips.
At some point, his whole palm had come to cradle my cheek.
Still warm.
Still burning.
And… his face was moving closer.
This time, unlike before, his mask was open at the mouth.
If this kept going—
“W-wait! Please—ah!”
“……”
Reflexively, I pushed him away with both hands.
I didn’t even realize I’d done it until after.
I might’ve overdone it, but luckily he was a veteran Hunter—estimated at least A-rank.
Someone like me, who hadn’t yet fully mastered my S-Class strength, couldn’t do much to him.
He stumbled back a bit, but he didn’t seem hurt.
Still… he looked kind of shocked.
His lips were stiff.
Maybe he’d expected me to accept the kiss, thinking the mood had been right.
I panicked. It was just too sudden, too overwhelming.
It wasn’t that I disliked him.
No. I definitely liked him.
He was my hero.
It’s just… I didn’t want to kiss him right now.
What should I do in a moment like this?
My thoughts were scattered.
I finally managed to speak.
“I… um… c-could we… just take it slow? I’d like that.”
I was nervous he might snap back with, “But we’ve already kissed and hugged—why now?”
I wouldn’t know how to respond to that.
But thankfully, he simply stepped back.
Not only that—he lowered his head, looking a bit dejected.
“…I’m sorry.”
“No! You don’t have to apologize… It’s just… I’m not used to this kind of thing yet…”
My face felt like it was on fire.
Even though his mask covered everything, and we weren’t making eye contact, I was still terrified he could see my expression.
I liked him.
After Taehwan and my family, he was probably the person I liked most.
‘I have to tell Taehwan soon.’
Right now, I needed to talk it through with Taehwan.
How would he react if I told him I was gay?
Probably surprised.
If I told him I’d already kissed Gray Coat… would he scold me?
After the Gate accident, most people avoided me.
No one really got close except Taehwan.
But back when I was a kid and more active, he’d always warned me never to follow strangers, never let anyone touch me, not even to hold hands.
And now I’d barely left the hospital and already caused trouble…
He might be really upset.
Still, I wouldn’t hide it anymore.
As soon as he comes back, I’ll tell him everything. I’d made up my mind.
Meanwhile, Gray Coat looked even more dejected.
…Like a giant dog who got scolded after getting too excited.
“I didn’t seek you out with impure intentions.”
“Ah, I know! I didn’t turn you down because I suspected anything like that!”
…Did I hurt his feelings after all?
But a kiss—back then I was acting strange.
Normally, you don’t just… do it, right?
Even in that movie I saw recently, the couple already seemed like lovers, and still, there was this long, teasing build-up before they finally kissed—only after the climax.
“Um, let’s take it slow. How about… starting with just holding hands?”
How do people even date again?
I wish Taehwan had told me more about it, but he never said a word.
Still, probably, most people don’t start off with a kiss.
Oh, wasn’t there a ‘talking stage’ or something before dating?
“…Okay. Then, hands first.”
The moment I saw the hand he offered, I had a sinking feeling.
Maybe even holding hands was too early.
Shouldn’t we have talked more first?
Spent more time together getting to know each other?
But I was the one who brought it up, and holding hands seemed innocent enough.
So I gently placed my hand in his, and as if he’d been waiting, he clasped it firmly.
That seemed to ease him a bit—he softly ran his thumb over the back of my hand.
The mood was… quite nice, actually.
But strangely, I felt off.
Like I was doing something wrong.
Not that we were barehanded—he was still wearing gloves.
I suddenly wanted to talk to Taehwan.
I wanted to ask if I was doing the right thing, if my thoughts made sense.
When was he coming back?
What would he say if I told him I kissed the guy he so strongly recommended as a mentor?
Would he change his mind and say I never should’ve?
Now that I think about it, maybe I should’ve told him right away…
– Bzzzt.
“…Huh?”
In the awkward silence, a vibration buzzed from somewhere—ah, it was from the wrist of the man in the gray coat.
Probably the watch issued by the Bureau.
* * *
