* * *
Felix had always been anxious when it came to Lowell, but ever since that incident, he’d become even more unstable.
With their lives so intertwined now and their focus on raising a newborn, Lowell hadn’t noticed the depth of Felix’s suffering—and the guilt hit him hard.
“Did I hurt you?”
Felix, finally realizing that the one he held was real and not some hallucination, regained his senses.
Seeing Lowell flinch, he quickly let go.
But Lowell’s skin, delicate as ever, was already flushed red where he’d been grabbed.
“You’re going to bruise.”
Felix looked even more stricken, unable to bring himself to touch the mark.
Seeing that, Lowell tapped the back of his hand gently.
“My skin just turns red easily, that’s all.”
“That can’t be. I know better than anyone how weak your body is. Even if I was confused, I wasn’t in my right mind.”
Felix’s face twisted again in regret over what he’d just done.
“I can’t believe I hurt you.”
Seeing him crumble like that made Lowell feel like he was being swept away by a crashing wave.
Felix, as if his tension had finally released, buried his face in Lowell’s chest.
He looked like a wild beast, unaware of its own size, trying to cuddle up to a human.
“Don’t ever leave without telling me again. Even if I’m asleep, wake me so we can go together.”
If Felix had said that in a forceful tone, Lowell might have tried to reason with him.
‘But if he asks me like this, all soft and pleading, how can I say no?’
Saying “okay” just to deal with the current situation would’ve been easy.
But Lowell didn’t want to avoid the deeper issue or take the easy way out.
“I know you need time. Until your heart begins to heal, I’ll do as you ask.”
“You have to do it regardless of how I feel, Lowell.”
The firm response sounded as if Felix believed his heart would never heal.
Unlike Felix, Lowell believed that time might not perfectly heal wounds, but it could at least wear them down.
‘He did say he’s healthier than before, so I should start working out, build up my stamina. Maybe learn some self-defense with a dagger. If he sees that, he might worry less and less.’
Lowell gently stroked Felix’s hair.
Felix closed his eyes, looking comforted.
‘For now, I need to give him something to focus on. Preferably something we can do together but still have time apart.’
Luckily, Lowell had a card up his sleeve.
“Felix.”
“Yes?”
“We said we’d hold a wedding once we got to Nix, remember?”
“Yeah. We agreed to do it after your recovery.”
Lowell had already received more than enough help from skilled priests, and Tacey was checking on him daily.
He didn’t need any more recovery.
The truth was, he didn’t feel the need to rush the wedding—or even particularly want it.
He had only gone along with Felix’s pace.
“What do you think about starting to prepare the wedding bit by bit, from tomorrow?”
“Huh?”
“All the important things are done, and Edwin was born healthy.”
Still, it was a sudden suggestion, especially under the circumstances.
And considering Felix knew Lowell didn’t seem that interested in the wedding, it made the offer even more surprising.
‘Honestly, I’ve never once wanted a wedding. Just thinking about it is exhausting.’
Lowell could endure it if it had to happen, but the whole process just seemed like a hassle.
‘And it’s a noble wedding, too.
Probably even more complicated than modern ones.’
Even so, he brought it up because he felt that the wedding could serve as a sort of “joint task” for them.
Working through it together might help soften the painful memories.
‘And maybe, a wedding with Felix won’t be so bad after all.’
He smiled faintly at the thought of Felix in a tuxedo.
The annoyance and exhaustion might fade when he saw that image in real life.
“True. Still, we can take it slow and let you rest more before the ceremony.”
“Even if we’re legally married, there are people who won’t know unless we have the ceremony. Even I still have trouble believing it sometimes.”
Lowell fabricated a more convincing reason, when really he just wanted to give Felix something else to focus on.
Felix, momentarily confused by the change in topic, crossed his arms and closed his eyes in thought.
“You still can’t believe you’re married to me?”
“It’s not because I dislike it or feel uncomfortable.”
“Then what is it?”
Felix looked a little hurt, and Lowell quickly waved his hands.
“It’s just… one day I woke up and we were suddenly married. And you—you kept calling me Lowell Clarke when you were looking for me.”
Felix’s mouth parted slightly in surprise.
“But I’m not Lowell Clarke anymore. I’m Lowell Lucas now.”
“Right.”
Felix sank into brief thought. Meanwhile, Lowell turned his head slightly.
The sun outside was brighter than when he had first arrived in Nix.
It might be a cold region all year round, but that didn’t mean there were no changes at all.
‘It’s not a complete lie, so it should be fine.’
With a subtle sense of guilt, Lowell brought up a detail to solidify his proposal.
“I want to exchange vows in front of the greenhouse. If we wait too long, it’ll start getting cold again.”
“In front of the greenhouse?”
“Yes. You made that place for me. Let’s show everyone how happy we are, right there.”
He’d spoken on impulse, but the more he thought about it, the more it sounded like a solid reason.
‘There are still people in Nix who see Felix as a fearsome ruler. If they see him with me, maybe that fear will ease a bit.’
Satisfied with his reasoning, Lowell looked up to hear Felix’s response—and found their eyes had already met.
“Okay. Let’s start preparing for the wedding tomorrow.”
It didn’t take long for Lowell to understand why so many couples fight during wedding planning.
Agreement was not easy to come by.
“You really want to install a fountain that grand?”
“If it’s going to match your gorgeous looks, it has to be at least this much.”
Every time Lowell tried to keep the budget reasonable, Felix gave him a similar answer.
“But you said you’re going to cover my entire face with a thick veil anyway! No one will even see my features properly!”
“Of course. If we don’t, some shameless person might fall in love at first sight with the one getting married.”
“What? These are guests who came to celebrate our wedding! Who’s going to do that?!”
When Lowell raised his voice, clutching the back of his neck, Felix instinctively glanced toward the cradle.
Lowell lowered his voice, realizing he’d gotten too worked up.
“Seriously, that’s just absurd.”
“Falling for your charm is beyond anyone’s control. It’s like divine revelation.”
Lowell pressed a hand to his forehead, stifling the sigh rising from deep within.
“Let’s divide the tasks. And we don’t comment on what the other person decides.”
It wasn’t an ideal solution—after all, it took away the whole point of working together.
But Lowell had no choice.
‘At this rate, the wedding will either take a whole year to plan or we’ll still have nothing decided the day before.’
Neither option was one he wanted to imagine.
Apparently, Felix felt the same, because he nodded without much hesitation.
“That sounds good.”
“You can decide who to invite and how the ceremony will be run. I’ll take care of the rest.”
“You don’t need to go through all that trouble. I can handle everything.”
Lowell imagined what would happen if he left it all to Felix—and quickly shook his head.
Felix would probably try to cover up every bit of Lowell’s face and skin, giving people all kinds of strange ideas.
“No. For things like this, I think we should rely on Hamilton. He knows more than either of us, and things will go much smoother.”
“Alright.”
Felix seemed like he was about to wrap up what he was saying, but suddenly began tapping his pen lightly on the desk, sinking into thought.
Then, before Lowell could even ask what was on his mind, Felix gave a serious piece of advice.
“Don’t overdo it. Your health comes first. The wedding is just a matter of appearances.”
Lowell had fully expected to hear something absurd—like insisting his face be completely covered—so he was left utterly speechless.
He felt a twinge of guilt for not trusting Felix, who was clearly thinking of him.
“And there’s no need to make yourself look even more beautiful. You’re already beautiful enough. Who knows what kind of trouble it might cause if you dress up even more.”
But just as that trust had begun to sprout, it was immediately stomped on.
Lowell shook his head, exasperated.
* * *
