* * *
Even as I spoke of my own death, I felt nothing.
There was no lingering attachment to that place—just a clear realization that I had left it behind.
Right now, the only thing that mattered was Raizen’s reaction.
His eyes widened slightly at my words, then he lowered his gaze, covering his mouth with one hand.
“…That’s…”
“……”
“I’m sorry, Sei. That’s not what I wanted to hear.”
He murmured softly and rubbed his face with both hands.
He looked devastated.
“That’s why… don’t worry. Even if I fall asleep again, it won’t mean I’ve returned to my original world. It’ll just be a long dream, nothing more.”
And that was the truth.
Raizen seemed to think only in two paths—either here or there.
‘Is it because he believes I was happy in my original world?’
I was curious about his reasoning for wanting me to return, but I was just too tired to care.
It wouldn’t change anything even if I knew.
“So, do you believe me now?”
I deliberately left out the subject.
Raizen gazed at me quietly before giving a gentle smile.
“I’ve always believed in you.”
Why did that sound so sincere?
I swallowed a bitter smile and nodded.
“You should go now, shouldn’t you? The host of the party shouldn’t be gone for too long.”
“What about you?”
“I’ll stay here a little longer. Being around so many people is exhausting.”
“Alright.”
Raizen left the terrace without resistance.
I watched his retreating figure before leaning against the railing.
A chilly breeze ruffled my hair and grazed my cheek.
As I rubbed the stinging skin, my gaze settled beyond the terrace.
The garden was neatly arranged, with lights positioned at just the right spots.
It had been beautiful in the daytime, but at night, it carried an even more enchanting atmosphere.
A few people were strolling through it, holding hands.
‘Aren’t they cold?’
A small chuckle escaped me.
But that laughter soon turned into a sob.
Before I knew it, my face was wet with tears.
I covered it with both hands.
“…Ha.”
I already knew.
This was a relationship built out of necessity.
Without divine power, I meant nothing to Raizen.
The only reason this Sean Noir Kreveta survived was because he had divine power.
‘I knew that, so why does it still hurt?’
I despised myself for holding onto even the smallest hope.
Even though his Affinity was at -3, which spoke louder than words.
Why had I dared to dream?
“Haha…”
I kept laughing, even as my tears wouldn’t stop.
[Quest Completed!]
Not long after I told Raizen about my death in the original world, a system message appeared.
That… that couldn’t be right.
With a sinking feeling, I looked at Raizen.
He was staring at me, slightly surprised—
And smiling.
The corners of his lips had curled up.
He must have realized it too, because he quickly covered his mouth with one hand.
‘That’s…’
‘I’m sorry, Sei. That’s not what I wanted to hear.’
It was more than enough.
Enough to tear my heart apart.
After learning I had nowhere left to return to, only then was his distrust and misunderstanding resolved?
How was I supposed to accept that?
No—was this even something I could accept?
I didn’t know.
At this moment, no matter how I looked at it, I could only think negatively.
Then, another system message appeared.
My vision was blurry from the tears, but I could already guess what it was.
A reward, or the next quest.
‘Of course. It just had to be now…’
Was the system simply oblivious, or was my heart so insignificant that it didn’t even matter?
I wiped my eyes and forced myself to read the quest properly.
[Quest
Find the Divine Beast’s Egg.
- Follow the sacred energy.
- Obtain the Divine Beast’s Egg (0/1).
Reward: A hint.
ㅎㄱㄷ (Affi?) ]
‘Ugh, my brain isn’t working.’
I lightly patted my cheeks and read the quest again carefully.
Sacred energy, the Divine Beast’s Egg.
The reward was a hint.
At the end of the message, there were unfinished characters: ㅎㄱㄷ…?
‘…Affinity?’
Was it telling me to check my Affinity?
At a time like this?
Even though I felt ridiculous, I was drawn in as if hypnotized and checked the Affinity list.
[Raizen Miel Pantheon / Affinity: -2]
“……”
Maybe I should just stop thinking altogether.
Or perhaps, I should uproot this damn feeling completely.
‘The latter is the only answer.’
But how was I supposed to do that?
I never intended to like him in the first place—so was it even possible to stop, just because I decided to?
Could I really just vow not to like Raizen from this moment on?
That… didn’t seem possible.
‘Unless I never see him again.’
There’s a reason people say, “Out of sight, out of mind.”
If I lived as though he was someone I’d never see again, maybe I could forget him.
His face, his voice, the memories, even these feelings.
‘I have to leave.’
It wasn’t difficult.
I was simply returning to my original goal.
No, my goal had never changed in the first place.
The problem was that my heart kept straying down a different path.
Instead of a peaceful, solitary life in a quiet retreat, I had unknowingly begun dreaming of a life by Raizen’s side.
“…Haa.”
Thankfully, the cold helped.
Because of it, my tears dried quickly, and I regained my composure faster than expected.
“You’re watching, right? I don’t know why you’re not responding in the chat, but since you’re still giving me quests, I assume you’re alive and well.”
Of course, no reply came.
I sent another message.
“I won’t ask unnecessary questions anymore.”
Looking back, the ancient gods had always wanted just one thing from me—to lift Raizen’s curse.
Even the quests… some were confusing, but ultimately, their intentions had always been clear.
‘It was me who kept asking irrelevant questions.’
Who I was, why I ended up in this world—
All the secrets that only the ancient gods knew.
Back then, those things mattered to me.
But not anymore.
It was undeniable that I could never return to Korea.
I had to survive in this world, no matter what.
“I’ll actively cooperate in breaking Raizen’s curse. So don’t betray me on this.”
A warm breeze suddenly wrapped around me, then vanished.
That was probably Noah’s way of giving an affirmative response.
‘Good. That’s enough.’
With my thoughts sorted and my resolve set, I felt strangely relieved.
I could return to the party hall now.
Even if I saw Raizen again, I’d be fine.
I turned to leave the terrace—
But just then, the door opened from the inside, and someone rushed in.
“Hic… Hhng…!”
They started sobbing without even noticing me.
Normally, I would have quietly stepped aside.
But I couldn’t this time.
I could never forget that green hair.
‘No way… Jason Odil?’
This felt oddly familiar.
“Hic… Hhic…!”
He was crying miserably.
I pulled a handkerchief from my pocket and approached him.
“Here.”
Jason Odil, who clearly hadn’t noticed me, lifted his tear-streaked face.
His eyes widened to the size of saucers.
“Hic! Hiccup…!”
Seriously…
How could someone be so completely the same?
The only difference was that he seemed a little less confident than before.
‘Wasn’t he supposed to be the favored son of his family?’
They said he was smarter than his peers.
He must have entered the Royal Academy, then.
Were his grades not as good as expected?
I didn’t know much about Baroness Odil, but with her personality, I doubted she would have let things slide.
“This… hic, this place, how… hic!”
“I just wanted some fresh air.”
I answered briefly and handed a handkerchief to Jason Odil.
He glanced between me and the handkerchief before finally accepting it.
‘Why is he being so compliant?’
“Th-Thank you… hic…”
He even thanked me politely. Had he grown up a bit?
“You don’t have to return the handkerchief.”
Jason Odil sniffled and nodded.
Even then, he kept scratching his forearm absentmindedly.
He used to cover his arms whenever I appeared on the terrace as a child.
It was winter back then, too, and he wore long sleeves.
‘Just how severe is the punishment he receives?’
I held back a sigh that was about to escape.
Honestly, I had no strong feelings toward Jason Odil.
If anything, they leaned more toward the negative side.
But just like back then, even now, I couldn’t bring myself to ignore him.
‘Who am I to pity someone else?’
Or maybe it really was just empty sympathy.
After all, I no longer lived in that hell.
I had escaped a life where the very people meant to be my greatest support were the ones who hurt me the most.
Maybe that was why.
“…If you want to cry, then cry until you’ve had enough.”
That was the best thing I could say.
As if my words had been a signal, Jason Odil started crying again.
I watched him for a moment before leaving the terrace.
Just then, my gaze landed on another head of green hair.
Smiling brightly while conversing with other nobles stood Jason Odil’s older brother, Jayren Odil.
‘His expression… has changed a lot.’
As a child, he had a gentle face and used to dote on Jason obsessively—almost like a butler rather than a brother.
But now… he bore the exact same expression as Baroness Odil.
Fierce and greedy.
‘Well, it’s none of my business.’
I withdrew my gaze from the Odil mother and son and walked away.
* * *
