* * *
‘Distrust? Resolve his misunderstanding?’
The unexpected words froze my thoughts for a moment.
But the chill trickling down my shoulder quickly snapped me back to reality.
Raizen’s red eyes, fixed on me, were faintly tinged with dark energy.
‘Again.’
Earlier too—just now as well—Raizen had that same ominous aura.
It wasn’t that mass of darkness I had seen before.
There was no overwhelming malice in it.
But… it felt similar.
Like if I left it alone, that darkness would completely consume him.
“He just came out of nowhere and apologized for what happened during the Awakening Ceremony.”
I spoke instinctively, as if I were simply baffled by the situation.
“The Awakening Ceremony? …When we ran into him in Shailot Village?”
His voice remained unsettlingly low.
To say I wasn’t intimidated would be a lie, but I forced myself to continue speaking calmly.
“You remember? Yeah. He said he wanted to apologize for what happened back then… So I just said okay.”
I nearly glanced at Raizen to gauge his reaction but stopped myself.
Instead, I shrugged and lowered my gaze.
Acting was all about shamelessness.
That was something I had learned after being forced to play a clueless child in this world.
But of course, Raizen wasn’t going to let it go that easily.
“Then why did you talk for so long?”
‘Weren’t you busy dancing?’
Well, he probably caught glimpses of us whenever he switched partners.
But that wasn’t the point.
The problem was that I had no way of brushing this off.
For some reason, Raizen was uneasy about my conversation with young master Luavis.
‘Uneasy?’
That word made me glance at Raizen’s face again.
More precisely—his eyes.
The dark energy still flickered, but it wasn’t just that.
‘…What the hell?’
Why did he look… anxious?
“Sei.”
“What, did something happen between you two?”
I deliberately avoided calling him ‘young master Luavis.’
Just in case Raizen got the wrong idea.
“What did he say to you?”
Instead of answering, he threw another question at me.
“……He told me not to trust you too much.”
Raizen blinked before lowering his gaze.
The dark energy around him stirred.
‘What the hell? What’s wrong with you?’
No matter what Raizen had done, he wasn’t the type to get caught.
If someone found out, he would’ve silenced them before they could talk.
Which meant… he hadn’t done anything.
‘Then why do you look so scared?’
If you act like that, you’re going to make me… start expecting things I shouldn’t.
Frustration flared inside me.
The Raizen I knew would have played it off shamelessly or pretended to be pitiful, asking, “So, do you not trust me?”
But instead, he was lost in thought, avoiding my gaze.
“Hyung.”
I grabbed his hand without hesitation.
“Did he get something on you?”
“Of course not.”
“Then why do you look so defeated? I was already annoyed because that guy kept talking like he knew everything, assuming I was some kind of victim.”
Raizen finally met my eyes. The dark energy in his gaze had faded slightly.
“He kept acting like I must’ve suffered under you, and then had the nerve to say we should be friends…”
“……”
“So I told him fine. He wants to exchange letters.”
“Wait, Sei—”
“Let me finish first.”
I cut him off and glanced around.
People weren’t approaching, but their eyes were still on Raizen.
“Let’s go to the terrace.”
This was going to take a while.
“Alright.”
Raizen stepped forward as if he had been waiting.
Not only did he obediently follow my words, but he even took the lead.
Seeing that made me chuckle for some reason.
I shouldn’t be thinking like this, but… he’s cute.
‘This isn’t the time for that.’
I quickly pulled myself together and followed after Raizen.
Maybe because the night air was chilly, the terrace was empty.
Perhaps we were just lucky to find an unoccupied spot right away.
After making sure the door was properly shut, I turned my head.
A sudden gust of wind tousled my hair, partially obstructing my view.
I held it in place with one hand and spoke.
“I don’t like him.”
I meant it.
Ever since Kim Minsoo made his hatred for Raizen clear, that feeling had solidified within me.
From his perspective, despising Raizen was completely justified.
Even I could admit that, objectively, siding with Raizen—the mastermind—probably made me seem unreasonable.
‘But so what?’
The time when I didn’t exist, when only Kim Minsoo’s memories remained, had nothing to do with me.
What mattered to me was the present—the Raizen standing before me, and the time I had spent with him.
‘Raizen, who didn’t kill Seian Crebeta at fifteen.’
Reality had already diverged significantly from the original story.
If I ignored my vague anxiety that Raizen might one day kill me, the facts were clear.
“It’s partly because he’s from that family, but what’s even more suspicious is how easily he flipped, like turning over a hand. If he truly wanted to apologize for what happened four years ago, he wouldn’t have done it here, in the middle of a party with everyone watching. He’s definitely after something.”
“……”
“I also thought there had to be some ulterior motive for him approaching me.”
Raizen, who had been listening in silence, finally moved his lips.
“……So.”
“……”
“So, you accepted it? That bastard’s proposal?”
His tone was almost accusatory.
“Why?”
“……”
“I should be allowed to do at least that much, don’t you think? Sure, it was an impulsive decision, but…”
I knew.
I knew exactly how reckless my actions seemed.
But this was the only way I could bring up my conversation with Kim Minsoo to Raizen.
I had no idea how Kim Minsoo might twist our discussion, so lying about it outright was too risky.
‘If he tries to manipulate things, it’d be a disaster.’
“Besides, I thought it would be a good chance to figure out what he’s really up to.”
That was the extent of my clumsy excuse.
I hesitantly lifted my gaze to look at Raizen.
He had his eyes lowered, lost in thought.
How long did that silence last?
“…Like you said, he changed just like that.”
“Huh?”
“That guy. Almost as if… he became a completely different person.”
The red eyes that had been staring at the floor suddenly met mine.
He wasn’t doing anything but looking, yet there was an intensity—like he was studying my every reaction.
His words, his actions—everything about them felt loaded with meaning.
And then, I suddenly remembered the quest that had appeared out of nowhere.
[Quest
Resolve his distrust of you.
- Clear up Raizen Pantheon’s misunderstanding (0/1)
- Reward: Next quest
Distrust. A misunderstanding.]
Raizen’s actions ever since I woke up… Even though my divine power could always be replenished as long as I was alive, even if I never woke up again, he had still been anxious.
At the time, I brushed it off, assuming it was just because the curse had to be purified through physical contact.
‘But there’s no way Raizen Pantheon would get anxious over something like that.’
If he was uneasy, it would’ve been because he thought I might never return.
In other words, it meant that, to Raizen, I had somewhere else to return to.
No way…
‘Did he realize I’m a transmigrator?’
How is that even possible?
“Sei.”
Raizen reached out and took my hand, idly playing with my fingers.
It was a strangely careful gesture, completely at odds with the situation.
“The you I know is the one standing right in front of me. So nothing else really matters.”
“……”
“But… someone similar to you showing up—that’s different.”
I’m screwed.
That was the first thought that popped into my head.
Raizen knew I wasn’t originally from this world.
And now, after witnessing Karon Luavis’s sudden change, he had figured out that he was the same as me.
“Sei.”
“……”
“My wish is…”
“……”
“…for you to never leave my side.”
“……Why?”
I hadn’t planned on asking.
The answer was obvious.
Because I had divine power.
Because I was the only one who could purify his curse.
And yet, the question slipped out anyway.
Because of this ridiculous, pathetic hope.
No matter how much I tried to suppress these emotions, they always resurfaced, filling me up to the brim until I felt like I was going insane.
And Raizen kept stirring them up.
Like he was testing me—seeing if my feelings would overflow despite everything.
‘He keeps confusing me.’
The system’s unchanging -3 Affection Score—I was starting to wish it was just a bug.
“Why… do you want me to stay by your side forever?”
I wasn’t hoping for him to feel the same way.
I just…
‘Just tell me I mean something to you.’
Even if it’s only because I’m family, that would be enough.
“Because I need you.”
‘Ah…’
Of course. That’s how it is.
And yet, I still felt stupidly hurt.
“…Yeah. I came from another world.”
Resigned, I continued speaking.
“And just like you guessed, that guy is the same as me. But we have completely different goals. I can guarantee it—I will never stand on his side. If you’re worried, we can even make a Magician’s Oath.”
“……”
“And also…”
My throat tightened.
I swallowed hard and forced a smile.
“Don’t worry. I have nowhere to return to.”
“……”
“The original me… is already dead.”
* * *
Poor Sei, just a crumb of feelings from Raizen would be enough 🥺