* * *
No way. Batista?
The proud, arrogant Batista?
“I won’t laugh.”
Okay, I hoped I wouldn’t.
I mean, he’d apparently swallowed all that pride to write me an apology on paper?
And judging by the sheer number of crumpled-up drafts, it had been hard.
Of course I was happy!
Of course I was thrilled!
I might laugh the second I read it.
But if I said that, he might freak out and take it all back.
Better to just do it and apologize later.
I looked down and opened the paper in my hand.
“Raul” was written on it—then scribbled out with these thick, angry lines.
So cute!!
His handwriting was terrible.
I had to physically hold myself back.
I’d only seen two letters and I was already fighting the urge to laugh out loud.
But the fact that he’d gone through all this—used up all this paper just to tell me something—it filled me with this overwhelming joy I could barely contain.
I covered my mouth and trembled, trying so hard not to laugh.
This was him doing his absolute best.
Once I managed to calm down, I reached for another paper ball.
“To Raul.”
“To Raul Florenti.”
Even just starting with my name had tripped him up over and over again.
Every time he didn’t like how it looked, he’d tossed it out.
“How do you even write a letter?” I whispered, grinning.
This is adorable.
He’d wanted to write me a letter.
Just imagining Batista—usually so serious and closed-off—sitting at a desk, pressing his pen hard into the paper, trying to make it neat just for me…
I thought I might actually die from how precious that image was.
For someone like him, this had to be so hard.
What was it he wanted so badly to say?
I reached for the most crumpled paper of them all and gently unfolded it.
[To Raul Florenti.
I’ve said things out loud before, but my feelings never seemed to get across. After thinking long and hard about what might bring you back to me, I decided—for the first time—to write you a letter.]
I dropped it.
“Waaah!”
I-Is this a dream?
No, there’s no way a situation this overwhelming could appear in my dreams, so it must be real.
Even letting Batista’s letter hit the ground felt blasphemous, so I scrambled to grab it before it fully fell.
[To Raul Florenti,
I’ve said things out loud before, but my feelings never seemed to get across. After thinking long and hard about what might bring you back to me, I decided—for the first time—to write you a letter.]
It really said that. Same as before.
It’s definitely not a dream, and I’m not misreading anything.
“…What are you doing?”
A slightly embarrassed scolding pierced through me.
I had no idea how to respond.
My heart was pounding like crazy.
No, seriously.
I can’t help it.
“Ughhh.”
I couldn’t take my eyes off the crumpled letter.
The bold, rough handwriting shimmered in front of me.
‘What might bring you back to me?’
That unexpected sentence scraped across my heart like a blade.
‘After thinking long and hard’
Batista! He actually thought about how to bring me back!
And for a long time, too! It’s the first time I’ve heard Batista’s true thoughts this clearly—he’s always been so quiet.
The reason he avoided being honest like this… must’ve been written right at the start.
‘I’ve said things out loud before, but my feelings never seemed to get across.’
Batista is naturally blunt and awkward with people.
He has no choice but to be inarticulate.
Competing with someone like Gaspar, who draws people in effortlessly, would’ve been impossible.
Just as I’d guessed.
Batista, who isn’t just bad at dealing with people but even worse at navigating social situations, must’ve been in a terrible spot.
He was probably tormented by Gaspar for a long time, hurting quietly all the while.
And then, when he finally opened up to someone he thought he could trust, he got shut down.
Worse, people probably claimed it was just a misunderstanding and called him an ungrateful disciple.
Gaspar had likely already taken control of Batista’s small circle of connections by then anyway.
If that happens enough times, you start doubting yourself.
You lose the confidence to convince anyone of anything.
That kind of trauma doesn’t just vanish after you break free from the person who caused it.
So for Batista, trying to have an honest conversation with someone… it wasn’t just meaningless—it was something that would only ruin relationships.
For a long, long time, his sincerity had been ignored, until he finally gave up on trying to connect with anyone at all.
‘But still—!’
Even so, Batista wrote me a letter!
He couldn’t say it out loud, so he agonized over how to do it and ended up grabbing a pen!
“Aagh!”
It’s overwhelming! I’m gonna lose my mind!
All the stupid stuff I did comes rushing back to me.
I—I didn’t even believe him when he said Gaspar was a monster and thought Batista was the bad guy!
On top of that, I ran around trying to play mediator!
And then Batista caught me in the act and got so furious.
I should’ve just backed down, but no—I let my dumb little crush get the better of me and snapped back instead!
God, I’m such an idiot, even I think so.
My legs gave out, and I dropped to my knees.
I was planning to kneel when I apologized anyway, so this just moved the schedule up.
I’ll just stay like this as a form of penance.
“I was wrong.”
I have no idea if this will make Batista forgive me, but still!
“I’m… I’m garbage.”
“…Aren’t you going to read the rest?”
“No!”
I mean—yes! I am going to read!
Worried he might throw the letters away, I knelt on the ground and hurriedly gathered all the scattered pages.
Batista looked down at me with an incredibly unimpressed expression, but I couldn’t help it.
I wanted to read every single one, without missing a page!
‘You weren’t anywhere in town. Did you really leave? I feel bad about what happened last time. I said it in a moment of anger…’
He messed up the next part!
His hand must’ve been shaking!
He scribbled it out ’cause he didn’t like how it looked?!
What do I do, that’s way too cute!
And he even said he was sorry.
That proud, noble hero actually apologized!
Now my hands were shaking.
No, my whole body was trembling.
This is a huge deal.
It’s proof of how much Batista values me—his first companion after giving up on connecting with others.
I’m so moved…
“I think I’m gonna cry.”
“If you keep being dramatic, I’ll rip them all up.”
Dramatic?!
How is this dramatic?!
I’m being completely serious here!
I wanted to argue, but when I looked up, Batista’s cheeks were flushed red.
Of course he’d be embarrassed—he was showing me a letter full of his rawest feelings.
He’s so cute I could die.
And I think I understood now why he was letting me read this even though it embarrassed him.
‘How could I share my own personal story with someone who won’t even open up to me?’
That’s what I yelled at him before.
To soothe my anger, he swallowed his pride and laid himself bare in that letter.
Isn’t that just… the most lovable thing ever?
How can anyone not fall for someone this kind and thoughtful?
Falling for Batista wasn’t my choice.
He’s the one who made me feel something way too big to handle!
Ahh, I really am gonna cry.
But if I cry, Batista might get embarrassed and tear the whole thing up, so I held it in.
* * *
