* * *
“If you’re not going to go…”
Lowell couldn’t finish his sentence and shut his mouth.
He knew there was no point in saying it.
Unless Felix were far away, it didn’t make sense for him to avoid participating in the battle when he was so close.
Felix was the lord who protected Nix and the symbol of victory.
‘Felix wouldn’t get hurt in such a minor skirmish. This must be about not wanting to stir up any unnecessary trauma.’
Lowell understood this rationally, but he couldn’t help wanting to grab the hem of Felix’s robe.
Sensing this hesitation, Felix, now prepared to leave, approached him, crouching down to look into Lowell’s face as he sat on the bed.
Feeling ashamed for holding him back in such a critical moment, Lowell averted his gaze.
“What’s worrying you?” Felix asked.
“It’s nothing. I just misspoke,” Lowell replied quickly.
Felix, as if unbothered by the urgency of the situation, carefully examined Lowell’s expression.
To hide his trembling hands, Lowell shoved them under the blanket.
‘Why do I feel so anxious?’
Lowell thought he’d fully adapted to this world, but in truth, he’d never encountered or directly faced a monster.
It was the first time he fully realized the constant threats surrounding him.
‘Is this really just concern for the people around me?’
Confused, Lowell lowered his head even further.
Felix gently held his chin, lifting it to meet his gaze.
“Monster hunting like this is nothing. I promise I’ll come back safe and sound,” Felix said firmly.
It was unlike their usual dynamic.
The always-confident Lowell now appeared small and hesitant, while Felix, who was typically cautious and doubtful, spoke with unwavering determination.
“I understand,” Lowell murmured.
“Lowell, stay here quietly. Don’t open the door for anyone, no matter what. Eat your meals with the knights—don’t skip them. You mustn’t go hungry,” Felix instructed as if leaving a child in charge of the house.
Lowell felt stifled by his inability to suggest joining Felix, but he swallowed his frustration.
“Yes. I trust you’ll return safely,” he said with forced composure.
“Good.”
Satisfied with Lowell’s response, Felix rose to his feet.
“Tia, Charis, Phil—stay here,” Felix ordered, calling out to three of the knights waiting outside.
The named knights lowered their stances, awaiting further instructions.
“Protect Lowell no matter what until I return,” Felix commanded.
“Yes, sir!” the three replied in unison.
“Take care,” Lowell said as he stood to bid Felix farewell.
Felix nodded briefly before leaving the inn with the other knights.
“Hah…”
Standing by the window, Lowell watched as Felix’s figure on horseback disappeared into the distance.
“You don’t need to worry,” Tia, who was typically all business, spoke up, unable to ignore how desolate Lowell looked.
“Is that so?” Lowell replied but couldn’t tear his gaze away from the window, even though Felix had long since vanished from sight.
“This happened on the border of the forest and monster territory, so there’s a chance the creatures could descend to populated areas, which made it urgent. But these aren’t monsters that would pose a threat to well-trained knights and mages. Besides, His Grace is both a grand mage and the empire’s strongest knight. Nothing will happen,” Tia explained, her words calm and thorough, unlike her usual reserved demeanor.
‘Do I really look that anxious?’
Rubbing the back of his neck, Lowell stepped away from the window and returned to the bed.
“Thank you for the explanation. I suppose I’m worried because it’s the first time I’ve seen the Grand Duke head into battle,” Lowell admitted, clenching his still-shaking hands tightly.
Tia noticed but pretended not to, nodding stoically.
“You’ll soon grow accustomed to the victories His Grace brings back.”
Her words carried a profound trust in Felix.
Whatever people might say about him, Felix was undeniably the most reliable figure on the battlefield.
‘I wish Felix could be trusted like that wherever he goes.’
A bitter taste filled Lowell’s mouth.
On dangerous battlefields, in the safety of a castle, or even in the capital of Phoebos, Felix remained the same. Yet the way people viewed him differed, and that disparity pained Lowell.
“I hope so,” Lowell said, suppressing his feelings and replying to Tia with a smile.
“I think I’ll try to sleep a bit more,” he added, closing his eyes tightly as if to ignore the turmoil in his chest.
His body cried out for rest, but his overtaxed mind refused to let him drift off.
‘He promised, so everything will be fine.’
Lowell repeated the thought to himself, knowing full well that promises held no sway in battle.
Lowell knew he needed to eat but couldn’t muster the will.
He feigned sleep to skip lunch, but by dinner, he couldn’t avoid it.
As the sun began to set, Tia woke him gently.
“His Grace will scold us if you don’t eat,” she coaxed.
If not for her persistence, Lowell likely wouldn’t have gone near the dining hall.
“I’ll get up,” Lowell said, throwing on some simple clothes as he followed Tia downstairs.
On the way, he asked, “When do you think the Grand Duke will return?”
“Unless there are more monsters than anticipated, it should be wrapped up today. Eat and rest, and you’ll likely hear good news soon,” Tia said, offering a practical yet reassuring assessment.
Her honesty eased Lowell’s nerves more than blind optimism could have.
“That’s a relief,” he said, bracing himself for the countless battles that lay ahead.
‘I have to stay strong.’
With that thought, Lowell purposefully straightened his posture as they entered the dining hall.
He couldn’t let Felix see him like this—drained and defeated.
“What can I get for you?”
The server rushed over as soon as Lowell took a seat, their tone friendlier than usual upon noticing the knights at his side and assuming his high status.
“Do you have apple pie?”
Though he’d been eating all sorts of dishes lately, for some reason, apple pie was all he craved now.
“Of course!”
“Then I’ll have your most popular dish and a slice of apple pie, please.”
“The special today is tomato beef stew. Will that be alright?”
“Yes, thank you.”
Lowell smiled warmly as he responded.
Despite the deep hood of his robe, his appearance shone through, leaving the server blushing as they scurried off.
“Are you sure you don’t want to eat?” Lowell asked the knights in a friendly tone, hoping to show he was fine.
“It’s against protocol to eat while on guard duty. Don’t worry—we’re well-fed and strong.”
Seeing the somewhat awkward expression on Lowell’s face, Phil added softly.
“Yes. I eat ten times more than you do on an average day, so there’s absolutely no need to worry about me.”
Charis seized the moment to join the conversation, noticing that Lowell seemed more at ease when talking.
It was clear Charis wanted to help Lowell unwind, which worked to Lowell’s benefit since he often found relief from his worries through conversation.
“You must need to eat more because you’re larger than me and use your body more.”
“Please, drop the formal speech,” Phil said, grimacing in discomfort.
Lowell hesitated, unsure whether he should comply, but eventually shook his head.
‘Talking informally just doesn’t feel right. Is it because of my counseling habits?’
Although they weren’t married yet, the knights already treated Lowell as if he were the Grand Duchess.
While it might have been better to get accustomed to such closeness rather than remaining in an ambiguous position, changing his way of speaking wasn’t easy.
“I’ll work on it slowly. Maybe, once we’re closer, I’ll feel more comfortable using informal speech.”
As Lowell rubbed the back of his neck while speaking, Charis and Phil burst into laughter.
“Why are you laughing?”
“You’re just so honest,” Charis replied.
“I suppose I am.”
“And you seem decisive as well,” Phil added.
“That’s true. It didn’t take me long to decide to come to Nix.”
Lowell responded playfully as he accepted a bowl of stew, but deep down, he hoped rumors wouldn’t spread about Felix forcing him here with dark magic or anything ridiculous like that.
Still, he felt relieved that this lighthearted conversation eased his tension more than sitting alone in his room.
“The Marquis seems to truly care for His Grace,” Charis suddenly remarked.
“What?”
Lowell froze mid-bite, his spoon slipping from his hand.
“I’m sorry if that was inappropriate of me to say.”
“Do I really come across that way?”
Lowell was startled, wondering if his behavior genuinely gave that impression to others.
Seeking some reassurance, he glanced at Tia, who nodded firmly, interpreting Lowell’s gaze as a request for honesty.
“Yes, absolutely.”
Lowell, now holding his spoon again, began to reflect on his actions.
‘What exactly makes them think that?’
Lost in thought, he poked at the tomato stew absentmindedly, barely eating.
The dining hall became noisier as a group of injured individuals with bandages entered.
The commotion caused the knights to immediately stop talking and sharpen their focus.
Lowell, however, continued to push his spoon around aimlessly.
It wasn’t long before the spoon fell from his hand again, clattering onto the table.
“I heard that knights fighting in the forest got injured, so they sent clerics to treat them.”
“And they came straight here in the middle of treatment?”
“Seems so. I overheard them in their panic. They mentioned that His Grace was injured as well.”
Lowell’s face turned pale in an instant.
* * *
