Chapter 1- Prologue

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[I just thought it was my duty as a public figure. After experiencing so many things since I was young…]

It was by chance.

That day, I was tired of eating cold convenience store kimbap, so I decided to visit a cheap kimbap place near the subway station.

Was this a luxury I couldn’t afford?

On the TV in the background, my former colleague Woohyun was being interviewed.

[Singer Choi Woohyun, who donated 100 million won to the pediatric cancer ward…]

‘…The guy who wouldn’t even lend me money for hospital bills…’

Not long after that incident, the group started the process of disbanding.

The agency president, who had kept us tied down for ten years, was furious.

After meeting with enraged investors, he lost his mind and assaulted me.

Unfortunately, the blow damaged my eardrum.

Foolishly, I went to Woohyun, who was the most well-off among us, to borrow money for the hospital.

But all I received were resentment and curses.

“I thought I finally saw some light after all this hardship, but you ruined everything. How could you have the nerve to come here?”

“Do you really think it was my fault?”

“The facts don’t matter. The public only believes what they see.”

“I was a victim too…! Ha, Woohyun, I don’t have time for this. I’m really sorry to say this, but I need money…”

“Shut up and get out. I don’t have money to lend you. Damn it.”

“…I’m sorry… Woohyun, please… I’m in trouble…”

“Stop spewing nonsense. Thanks to you, the whole country sees us as a trash group… Do you even have a conscience? At one point, I relied on you as my older brother… I must have been crazy. Get out now, before I kill you.”

In the end, I missed the treatment window, and my left hearing was severely damaged.

Music was everything to me.

When I was young, my parents divorced and remarried, leaving me alone.

Apart from a bit of living expenses sent occasionally, I had no human warmth in my life.

Music gave me members and fans…

Now I was in a body that couldn’t make music and had to endure the sharp resentment of the people I loved.

Since then, I’ve been living just to survive.

Living a life where I had to hide completely to be forgotten.

How did it come to this?

This is why I didn’t want to go out.

Thanks to his family’s steady support, Woohyun managed to establish himself as an actor.

The other members also did well, riding on Woohyun’s media play that portrayed us as a pitiful group disbanded because of one member.

They became successful in variety shows, modeling, and internet broadcasting.

Once I disappeared, everyone was fine.

They all established their positions so well that I had to encounter them even when I didn’t want to.

They grew strong, using me as their stepping stone.

“Kimbap, one roll, ready for takeout.”

“Yes, thank you.”

I left the kimbap place in a hurry.

I should have just eaten at the convenience store.

As I quickly moved my steps, I felt a chilling sensation as I entered an alley off the main street. Footsteps followed me closely.

When I quickened my pace, the follower’s steps also quickened.

When I slowed down, the follower’s steps also slowed down.

At first, I thought it was a mistake, but soon I instinctively knew that the footsteps were indeed following me.

After the group disbanded, the few fans I had left all turned against me.

It didn’t take long for fans to become antis.

Knowing me better than my family, they knew exactly where to strike to hurt me the most.

Their small number of stones hurt more than the countless stones thrown by others because they knew me so well.

Unable to endure their terror, I moved several times, deleted my phone number and SNS accounts, and even requested police protection.

Most of them eventually grew up and stopped their malicious acts, or lost interest in me as I faded from the public eye.

But one guy kept chasing me.

The sound of those footsteps was unmistakable.

How did he find me here after being quiet for so long?

“Damn it…!”

I threw away the plastic bag in my hand and started running.

The man, who had been standing far away, seemed surprised that I was running and chased after me quickly.

“Joo Dansol!”

As if he no longer cared about hiding his identity, he called my name and ran after me.

I turned a corner to avoid him.

Screech—.

Bang!

I was hit by a delivery truck that was speeding through the alley.

It was a mistake to think there would be no running cars in such a narrow alley.

With a loud crash, my light body flew into the air like a bird.

‘What is this…?’

Everything around me moved in slow motion.

I slowly turned my head and saw the anti-fan who was chasing me.

I always ran away from their presence because I was so scared.

The moment I got hit by the car, I realized today might be my last day.

Today, I wanted to see his face directly.

And I wanted to ask.

Why do you hate and despise me so much?

I always talked about wanting to die.

Lacking the courage to do it myself, I wished every day that I wouldn’t wake up, that someone would kill me.

I never thought it would actually come true.

Life never granted me the things I desperately wished for, but it easily granted my wish to die.

The irony of it made me laugh.

Thud.

The man’s face was so ordinary.

He had no horns, no fangs, and no blood-red eyes.

Trying to capture the appearance of this very normal and kind-looking young man, Dansol kept his eyes open.

Perhaps because of the impact of hitting the ground, hot blood flowed continuously from my head.

The man in all black looked pained.

Anyone would mistake him for the victim, not the bully.

Why…?

Maybe because he had no one left to torment.

He must have always wished for my death.

Seeing it with his own eyes must feel different.

Ah… But I don’t want to die.

Why do I have to die?

Actually, when I said I wanted to die, it meant I didn’t want to live like this anymore.

I really wanted to live my life well too.

It became too hard to endure my heavy eyelids any longer.

When I gently closed my eyes, as if falling asleep, moments of my life flashed before me like a movie reel.

At age 4, when my mom and dad were yelling at each other.

At age 10, when I was like a burden, trying to read the adults’ moods.

At age 13, when I first passed an audition and entered the dormitory.

I think I was a bit happy back then, because I no longer had to walk on eggshells.

The countless trainees who passed through the dormitory, the day when the debut lineup was finally confirmed, the moment I was first cast in a daily drama, and when I was awkwardly appearing on variety shows…

Yeah. Damn, if only it weren’t for that.

If it weren’t for that program, I wouldn’t be dying such a miserable death here.

I would have just carried on with my modest activities, and even if I disappeared, I wouldn’t have been branded as the nation’s enemy.

All of this happened because of that crappy show.

‘RO Match Survival in Island.’

A crazy program where they locked up disgusting racists on an island and made them pair up.

If only I hadn’t been a victim of their evil editing, my life wouldn’t have gotten so twisted.

Without realizing it, I tightly clenched one of the fleeting scenes passing by.

If I had known I would die like this, I would have at least grabbed the producer by the collar like this.

But wait, am I really dying?

Like this?

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