* * *
“Suhyeon.”
Slumped on the sofa, Suhyeon had been tapping at his keypad only to delete his words over and over.
He flinched at the voice drifting right past his ear and sat up straight.
Before he knew it, Hajin was standing right in front of the sofa, though Suhyeon hadn’t heard him return or enter the room.
Hajin’s blue eyes looked down at him, shimmering with an unreadable light.
After calling his name, he said nothing more, simply staring at him fixedly.
His gaze was pinned to the phone screen in Suhyeon’s hand.
A heavy, stifling silence filled the air.
-Suhyeon?
As if oblivious to the tension, a messenger notification from the Association President chimed, prodding for the response Suhyeon hadn’t sent.
Suhyeon glanced down at the phone, then looked back up at Hajin.
He felt a sudden, nagging sense of guilt, as if he’d done something wrong.
“Hajin?”
Sensing the silence might last forever if he didn’t break it, Suhyeon called out cautiously.
At that moment, the blue eyes staring at him distorted with a pitiful longing.
Suhyeon blinked, wondering if he’d seen it wrong, but the sorrowful droop of Hajin’s eyes remained unchanged.
Slowly, Hajin sank down, kneeling on one knee before Suhyeon. Suhyeon adjusted his posture.
“Do you want to become a Guide affiliated with the Association?”
Hajin finally asked, looking up at him. It seemed he had seen the text messages on the phone.
Those bright blue eyes searched Suhyeon’s face, a desperate light flickering within them.
Enthralled by that vast blueness, Suhyeon flinched.
He had wanted to be Hajin’s exclusive Guide, but he hadn’t dared to ask out of fear—that was why he’d reached this conclusion.
Even calling it a ‘conclusion’ felt premature since he was still hesitating.
Besides, he was in a relationship now; he felt he shouldn’t even consider a life as an exclusive Guide for someone else, where physical contact was a daily requirement.
“Suhyeon.”
As Suhyeon wavered, unsure of how to answer, Hajin called him again.
Before Suhyeon could manage a word, Hajin continued.
“Do you have any idea how much the Association overworks people?”
Suhyeon blinked at the abrupt question.
“The President you saw last time—he’s all smooth talk, but he works people to the bone, whether they’re Espers or Guides. Since an Association Guide would fall under my jurisdiction, he’d push them even harder. They claim there are limits on mandatory Guiding sessions, but I’ve never seen them actually follow those rules.”
Hajin’s words poured out in a rapid-fire sequence.
“If a major Gate opens and there’s even a hint of damage, they call the affiliated Guides first and tell them to pour out every drop of their Guiding energy. Guides are human too; they get sick if they overexert their energy, but that man doesn’t care. He just keeps using them.”
Suhyeon blinked blankly at the stream of vitriol directed at the Association and its President.
Having finished his rant, Hajin sighed and leaned against the sofa and Suhyeon’s legs.
Then, his fingers began to brush gently against Suhyeon’s knee. His blue eyes remained lowered, focused on Suhyeon’s legs.
His fingers didn’t stop their restless, playful stroking.
With his brow furrowed just as it had been before, he looked somewhat dejected.
He looked like a sulky cat that wanted something specific.
It was clear Hajin was deeply unhappy with the idea of Suhyeon joining the Association.
But if that was the case…
“Can’t you just be my exclusive Guide?”
When the question finally dropped from Hajin’s lips, Suhyeon’s light brown eyes shook violently.
Whether he noticed the reaction or not, Hajin stopped teasing Suhyeon’s knee and leaned fully against his legs.
He reached out, wrapping his arms around Suhyeon’s waist.
His strong arms locked tight, as if he would never let him go anywhere else.
“I can’t give you to anyone else. You’re my lover, aren’t you? Please, be my Guide.”
The voice, thick with desire, pierced Suhyeon’s ears once more.
Only then did he feel the tangled mess of thoughts in his head finally clear away.
A sense of relief bloomed.
It seemed there had been no need for his agonizing deliberations after all.
“…Yes.”
Suhyeon answered, carefully stroking the hair of the man who was clinging to him. He felt Hajin quiver slightly.
He ran his fingers repeatedly through the man’s fine, soft hair.
As the clutter in his mind vanished, his body relaxed.
The peaceful glow of the sunset sparkled and seeped into the room.
“You never asked, so I thought maybe I wasn’t allowed to ask you.”
After stroking Hajin’s hair for a long while, Suhyeon whispered the words.
Hajin lifted his head.
The moment Suhyeon pulled his hand back, their eyes met—blue against light brown.
“You thought you weren’t allowed?”
At Hajin’s question, Suhyeon felt bashful and pointlessly clenched and unclenched his hand on the sofa.
“I mean…”
“The President mentioned it to me while you were there. I thought if you had wanted it, you would have just asked me then. I think I was just waiting for you to be the one to ask first.”
As he spoke, Suhyeon realized his own inner feelings and flushed with embarrassment.
A faint pink climbed up his fair cheeks.
Hajin stared at his face for a moment before tightening his hold around his waist.
“…I should have told you sooner.”
Hajin muttered, leaning his face against Suhyeon’s leg and looking up at him.
“I was afraid of putting a burden on you.”
Suhyeon tilted his head.
Suddenly, Hajin stood up, hoisted Suhyeon up effortlessly, and sat back down on the sofa, trapping Suhyeon within his embrace.
A refreshing scent teased the tip of Suhyeon’s nose.
As he always did, Hajin buried his face in Suhyeon’s shoulder and rubbed his cheek against him.
A low, purring sound of satisfaction vibrated from his throat.
“Just the fact that you became a Guide could be a burden to you. I was planning to block everything so that if you didn’t want it, you could live without ever having to make a choice.”
Suhyeon blinked his light brown eyes, which were shining brighter than usual in the sunset.
“…Is that allowed?”
“I’ll make it allowed.”
The sheer finality in his answer left Suhyeon staring blankly into space.
A corner of his heart felt ticklish, as if brushed by a feather.
To think he hadn’t spoken because he feared being a burden.
It had been a burden, and he had been incredibly stressed because of it… but perhaps because he had already moved past it to some extent, he hadn’t even considered that reason.
Reflecting on how his thoughts had been racing wildly in every direction, Suhyeon felt his cheeks heat up.
Behind him, Hajin reached for his hand, interlacing their fingers.
“…Is it really okay for you to receive Guiding?”
Feeling as if his face might actually cook, Suhyeon kept his head down and mumbled the question.
Yihan’s words about Hajin having bad memories of Guiding had made him continuously cautious.
“Why? Did someone say something?”
Hajin seemed to sense Suhyeon’s hesitation and asked softly.
Suhyeon hesitated, then whispered in a small voice.
“I heard you don’t accept Guiding from others…”
“Was it Ryu Lee-han?”
Mmm. Hajin instantly deduced who had told Suhyeon about his Guiding history.
Suhyeon hesitated before giving a small nod.
“Did he say I had bad memories?”
Suhyeon flinched as Hajin echoed Yihan’s exact words.
Hajin let out a short laugh.
“Were you worried?”
Suhyeon thought his face wasn’t just turning red anymore; it was practically glowing.
A mix of embarrassment, shyness, and a fluttering sensation heated his cheeks.
“It’s really not a big deal. It’s a childhood memory, and while it did leave me with a bit of a germaphobia, I never liked people much to begin with. It just amplified that. And,”
Hajin shifted Suhyeon from his seated position so they were facing each other.
Blue eyes met light brown.
Not stopping there, Hajin buried his cheek in Suhyeon’s hand.
Like a cat basking in its owner’s touch, he nuzzled against Suhyeon’s palm.
As if intending to enchant him completely in that state, Hajin savored the touch before suddenly opening his eyes to look at him.
His blue eyes swirled with a light that felt like it could swallow Suhyeon whole.
“Didn’t I tell you?”
His voice dropped to a low murmur.
“Suhyeon, you are always the exception.”
Hajin gently covered the hand that was cupping his cheek.
“I’ve never craved Guiding as much as I crave yours. Because it’s you, it feels even more exquisite.”
The bluntness of his words made Suhyeon’s face turn as red as humanly possible.
Hajin’s face naturally drew closer.
“So, you’re going to be my exclusive Guide. If you were to give Guiding to another human… I might actually lose my mind.”
It was simply, overwhelmingly sweet.
Suhyeon’s heated lips parted with practiced ease, accepting Hajin’s kiss.
Hajin swallowed and traced his lips without hesitation, lifting Suhyeon up.
As he was laid down on the bed, Suhyeon reached out and wrapped his arms around the neck of the man who hovered over him, continuing the kiss.
“Suhyeon, you’re mine.”
Like a beast staking its claim on its territory, Hajin growled as he captured Suhyeon’s lips.
* * *
