* * *
One of Taehwan’s hands was already resting over the restraint again.
I hadn’t noticed before, but his hand was huge.
Veined and strong, it looked like it could crush the restraint in one squeeze.
But of course, he wouldn’t do that… so instead, I slid my hand into his and gripped it tightly.
Maybe because I could see it so clearly, Taehwan’s hand looked even bigger over mine.
“Why suddenly talk about studying abroad?”
“Because your body’s better now. Let’s go back to studying. Preferably overseas. If you’re a student abroad, there are a lot fewer regulations here. You get exemptions for a lot of things. I’ll support you, no matter what you want to study.”
Exemptions, huh. I wondered why he was suddenly bringing up studying abroad—but I got it.
I understood his intentions.
He’s been consistent about this, ever since the ride to the Bureau.
He hates the idea of me fighting.
“Taehwan… are you worried I’ll become a Hunter?”
“……”
He let out a sigh, like I’d hit the mark.
His voice followed, tight and strained like a groan.
“…Yeah.”
“Why? I awakened, so I’ll get healthy soon. It’s not like I’ll be deployed right away. If I train, then—”
“It’s not that I think you’re weak. It’s just… people only see the successful dungeon raids. They don’t know what actually happens inside. Or they only see it through heavily edited footage. The truth is… it’s hell. People die in there. A lot. And they die horribly. Sometimes, their families don’t even get to see the bodies.”
“……”
You said you didn’t know much about dungeons because you’re not in combat, but you talk like you’ve seen it yourself.
…Though I guess that just shows how much you worry about me.
To Taehwan, I must be someone to protect, no matter what.
I guess it can’t be helped—he’s only ever seen me as a frail, dying person for the past thirteen years.
How do I convince him?
“Every job has risks. There’s no such thing as a completely safe one.”
“Jehee…”
“And more civilians die from gates or dungeon incidents than Hunters do. Their bodies aren’t any less torn apart.”
“……”
“I want to be someone who can reduce those numbers—even just by one. You know that’s been my dream since we were kids.”
I took a deep breath and gathered my strength.
The water and rest helped a little.
I could move a bit now.
I sat up to show him I meant it.
Braced my thighs, straightened my back, and looked him in the eye.
“We both know I can fight. I handled that monster in the hospital. They said I took down an A-rank, right?”
Did I manage to look confident?
Taehwan’s clear brown eyes wavered, and his lips parted just a little.
I tightened my core and spoke clearly.
“I know I ran in without thinking because I thought it was a dream… but I can do this. Trust me.”
“……”
His lips slowly closed.
Still holding his gaze, I gently reached up and placed a hand on his face.
Like a habit, I traced the sharp lines of his sculpted features and smiled.
“Taehwan… you’ve protected me all this time—so now, let me be the one to protect you.”
Even though I could barely stand upright because of a single restraint, I still meant what I said—even if it came off as arrogant.
Taehwan said he couldn’t fight.
But I think I can.
So I want to protect him.
I want to work hard and repay him for the kindness he’s shown me over the past 13 years.
Taehwan stared at me for a long moment, as I spoke stubbornly.
His expression was incredibly complicated.
Then he let out a sigh and dropped his gaze.
“…Fine. How could I possibly stop you? Do what you want.”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
He said yes!
I beamed with excitement, and just then, Taehwan’s large hand wrapped around my waist and suddenly lifted me up.
My view shot upward in an instant.
It reminded me of the “airplane rides” my dad used to give me when I was a kid.
“Jehee. Since you’re awake, let’s get you cleaned up. You sweated a lot today.”
“Uh… Isn’t it a bit late to be washing up?”
“It’s fine. Other people do it too. And honestly, you’re so grimy right now I can’t stand looking at you.”
“Wow. Then why were you holding onto this ‘grimy’ person?”
“Like sniffing a puppy’s paw? Sometimes you just feel like it.”
“Oooh… That’s weird…”
He could’ve just said he was worried and couldn’t let go.
Whatever.
If he won’t be honest, I will.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I whispered what I truly wanted.
“Since you were hugging the grimy one, you’re gonna wash up with me too.”
“…Okay.”
Finally, a smile appeared on Taehwan’s lips.
Side Story: Words and Actions Don’t Match
Jehee, who had been nodding off since the bath, completely passed out while drying his hair with warm air.
After carrying him to bed, I adjusted the pillow under his neck and pulled the blanket up over him.
“Mmgh…”
Maybe he realized he was on a bed, because he shifted slightly to get more comfortable—then turned toward me.
My gaze landed on his arm—specifically, his wrist.
The restraint with the red marking.
It didn’t suit his slender, twig-like arm and wrist at all.
But unfortunately, I knew.
I didn’t want to, but I already knew.
[Regarding Jung Jehee’s erratic and threatening behavior in the cafeteria, I assume you, Awakener Im Taehwan—who was present at the time—are well aware, aren’t you?]
For Jehee right now, that restraint was necessary.
Not just as a punishment for what happened in the cafeteria—but to prevent him from causing an accident he never intended.
When Jehee stood up from his wheelchair…
When he turned toward the guild master and members of “Sun”
… In that moment—no matter how low their rank—every hunter, every awakener must have known.
Their survival instincts must’ve screamed:
“This person is dangerous.”
“I was too complacent. I could’ve predicted this before it happened…”
I closed my eyes, my hand resting gently on Jehee’s wrist.
There were so many moments I regretted not imagining the worst-case scenario.
Like when we found the monster in the dungeon-infected hospital that clearly hadn’t been killed by the rescue team…
When I saw Jehee walking among the monster corpses, gripping a wheelchair…
When he bit my finger and I felt that sharp pain…
And even right before dinner, I’d heard it.
“I think the machine’s acting up. They told me to eat while they fix it.”
“What machine?”
“The power quantification machine.”
“…That thing broke?”
“Yeah.”
“…Weird. I’ve only seen that thing break once in my life…”
A quantification machine breaking…
It’s not something that just happens.
That thing is expensive.
The Bureau takes extreme care maintaining it.
If it suddenly breaks, there’s a reason—and I knew exactly what that reason could be.
Because the one who’d broken it before… was me.
The moment I entered the machine, it failed to function properly. Later, I was told the reason why.
“But I didn’t do anything…”
I knew why I made such a stupid choice.
I didn’t want to believe it.
Jehee’s sudden awakening was already overwhelming—I didn’t want to imagine that something worse was happening.
“Taehwan, what’s wrong? What’s going on?”
The moment I failed to take the watch off Jehee’s wrist.
The moment Jehee ended up telling everything to Jihye.
Back then, I was fully aware I had the face of a demon—terrifying and grim.
Now that Jehee has his sight back, he can see my face.
I should only show him good expressions.
I know that.
In my head, I know I shouldn’t be making this face.
But I couldn’t control it.
I couldn’t suppress the emotions enough to hide them.
He couldn’t see before, so I got used to not hiding my expressions.
It became a bad habit.
Goddamn it.
“How did it end up that you can see me now…”
The resentment faded as soon as I met his gaze—those worried eyes looking at me.
His hand reached out cautiously, gripping the hem of my shirt—and that alone dulled all my sharp-edged emotions.
“Are you feeling really upset?”
Even though my expression had softened, Jehee still looked worried.
His big eyes were full of me.
Focused on me.
Only looking at me.
I couldn’t keep radiating this killing intent in front of someone who sees the world so purely.
I gently stroked his soft hair and answered,
“…I’m fine. Don’t worry.”
Of course, I wasn’t fine.
Not at all.
Not even a little bit.
* * *
