We Just know Each Other EPILOGUE 1

Kim Hyunoh, 24 years old, Our Today

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I was completely drained just two hours after arriving at my aunt’s house.

My aunt kept crying without stopping, but I couldn’t shed a single tear.

I hadn’t been able to cry even when thinking about five years ago.

Crying wouldn’t change anything.

Maybe I didn’t even have the right to cry in the first place.

After all, I survived and they didn’t.

My aunt wiped her eyes with a tissue and spoke.

“…So, from now on, stay here with me. It’s really okay. Alright?”

Coincidentally, there was an extra room at my aunt’s place.

Her son had recently gone to Germany for his studies and would be staying there for a few years.

That seemed to be why she sought me out, asking me to live with her.

I felt suffocated. It was a consideration I didn’t want at all.

It was the same suggestion Kim Chanyi had made, but my feelings were entirely different this time.

The moment I stepped into this house, it felt like I had gone back in time, as if I were trapped in an old, faded photograph.

If I stayed here any longer, all the effort of the past five years would go to waste.

I had spent those days desperately running away from the past just to survive.

I had thought countless times that I should have died with them, but I still couldn’t bring myself to commit suicide.

Even if I couldn’t be happy, I had to keep living, even if it was just barely surviving

I closed my eyes tightly and pictured Youngjin’s face in my mind.

Come to think of it, today was the day I had to send money to Youngjin.

When I didn’t respond, my aunt grabbed my hand firmly.

“Kim Hyunoh, how long are you going to live in that semi-basement?”

“I don’t live there anymore.”

She must have hired a good private investigator to find me, but they didn’t seem to have the latest information.

“Then where are you staying?”

“At a friend’s place.”

“A friend?”

“Yes, a high school friend.”

I hadn’t contacted Kim Chanyi yet.

I probably wouldn’t make it back today.

“But you can’t stay at your friend’s place forever.”

“It’s okay for now.”

“But it’s better to stay with family, especially after such a big event. Do you know how worried I was about you? You disappeared suddenly after the funeral…”

I exhaled slowly and kept my mouth shut.

I hadn’t eaten anything, but I felt nauseous.

I could probably throw up my stomach acid.

My aunt’s hand, desperately holding onto mine, looked pale.

I felt like I’d be a terrible person if I pushed her away coldly.

My aunt was probably trying to survive too.

I knew she had been tormented with guilt, feeling like she was dying inside.

Five years ago, my dad had asked her for help, but she couldn’t do much.

In the end, our family moved down to Masan and that’s where they died.

She seemed to be trying to pay off her guilt by taking me in.

But I didn’t welcome it at all.

I wanted to tell her that her desperate kindness might kill me, but I couldn’t bring myself to say it.

I gently released her hand and stood up.

“I’ll think about it.”

“What’s there to think about? Why are you getting up? Are you leaving? It’s late. You should stay the night.”

She tried to grab me again, but I took a step back.

“Yes, I’ll leave tomorrow. I have a headache. Can I lie down for a bit?”

“Oh, yes, of course. I’ve kept you too long. Come on, you can sleep in Kisuk’s room.”

My aunt hurriedly got up and led me to Kisuk’s room, rummaging through the wardrobe to give me some clothes to change into.

“Rest comfortably. Come to think of it, it’s past dinner time. I should’ve fed you first. I’m so scatterbrained. Sorry about that. Is there anything you want to eat? We have meat and even crab.”

“Sorry, I already had dinner.”

My stomach hurt from long-standing hunger, but I wasn’t in a state to eat anything.

“Oh, I see. Well, then, is it okay if I make you breakfast tomorrow?”

“Yes, that’s fine.”

My aunt awkwardly smiled, closed the door, and left.

I stood still for a long time in the room of a cousin whose face I couldn’t remember.

My heart was racing. Trying to calm myself, I slowly looked around.

The room, which had been half-used as a storage space, had a row of dust-covered picture frames on the highest shelf of the bookcase.

One picture, in particular, caught my eye.

It was of my dad and my aunt, both smiling.

They looked much younger than my last memory of them, probably in their mid to late twenties.

They looked like me.

Suddenly, I felt like vomiting.

I crouched down and covered my mouth with my hand.

I felt the sensation of my insides turning over two or three times.

I fumbled for the tissue box on the desk.

Grabbing a few tissues, I wiped my saliva-soaked mouth vigorously.

I sat weakly on the edge of the bed. I wanted to die.

I couldn’t breathe properly.

This house was covered entirely with the past.

But I had to live.

I thought of reasons to endure, for the life that had fallen apart in my place.

I grabbed my phone urgently.

My trembling fingers kept pressing the wrong buttons.

Only after transferring 500,000 won to Youngjin did my breathing calm down.

Soon, I received a text from Youngjin’s mother.

-You don’t have to send it anymore

Since that day five years ago, Youngjin hadn’t been able to walk.

They said it was a miracle he was alive.

A bus with broken brakes had sped through the intersection, and a van had swerved onto the sidewalk trying to avoid it.

Youngjin’s parents ran a restaurant on that street.

Youngjin often played outside the restaurant by himself.

That day was no different.

The van hit Youngjin and crashed into a tree.

Shortly after, a minivan hit the van from the side, flipping it over.

The intersection turned into chaos.

There were about five collisions, and many people were injured or killed.

I ran toward the van crying but couldn’t see my family’s faces.

The leaking fuel caught fire, and the van exploded.

My world changed that day.

I pondered endlessly about where it all went wrong.

Every conclusion pointed back to me.

If only I hadn’t gotten out of the van then.

If only I hadn’t run away.

I should have stayed in the van somehow.

It would have been better to side with Mom and despise Dad. Or, I could have pretended not to know and begged them not to fight.

But what if the van was destined to head towards the intersection anyway?

I would have died with my family.

Yet, compared to living alone, bearing everything, death felt like a blessing.

Sometimes, I resented my dad.

I wanted to ask why he didn’t turn the wheel towards me instead of Youngjin, why he left me to live with this double burden of guilt.

Youngjin’s family situation was dire and worsened after he injured his leg. D

espite gaining life in Youngjin’s place, I could do nothing for him.

All Dad left me was a massive debt.