* * *
Before he realized it, Joel was snapping, “It’s not like it’s a picnic—why is Benjamin going?”
But the Crown Prince only gave him a subtle, amused smile.
Going together with Benjamin.
For an entire month.
As that thought sank in, all kinds of wild scenarios began running through Joel’s small, pretty head.
One month wasn’t a short time.
And this mission might even be dangerous.
Spending all that time side-by-side, overcoming difficult tasks together—of course they would get closer. It was practically inevitable.
And maybe—just maybe—there wouldn’t be enough rooms at Lord Bennet’s manor, and the two of them would have to share one.
The image of the Crown Prince and Benjamin sleeping peacefully in the same bed passed briefly through Joel’s mind, sparking a fierce wave of jealousy.
But he had to think rationally.
He had already decided to give up on the Crown Prince, hadn’t he?
Whether the Crown Prince dated Benjamin, or Robert, or that physician Dustin or whatever—none of it should matter anymore.
And besides, if the inspection trip took a whole month, he’d be three months pregnant by the time they returned.
He wasn’t entirely sure, but surely by then his belly would be starting to show.
Late March was deep into spring—he wouldn’t be able to hide it with clothes forever.
More importantly, he needed to secure new funds for his escape.
The kingdom of Palain, which Joel had in mind as his destination, would take over two weeks of nonstop travel from the capital, even without delays.
It was far, and to avoid checkpoints, he’d have to stick to backroads. Joel didn’t even know the route well—it could take him a month.
If his belly got too big, even riding in a carriage for long would be too difficult.
All things considered, there was simply no time to waste on a mission trip.
Logically, he knew that.
But still…
“Th-then I’ll go too.”
The words spilled out of Joel’s mouth before he could stop them.
Right after saying it, he realized his mistake and made a panicked face.
But even so, he didn’t take it back.
He knew he shouldn’t do this.
But no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t bear the thought of the Crown Prince and Benjamin spending a month alone together.
Whatever—it’s only a month.
It’ll be fine.
Three months pregnant isn’t that visible, right?
With that, Joel blindly chose to look on the bright side.
The moment Joel changed his mind at the mention of “Benjamin,” the Crown Prince smirked knowingly, as if he’d expected this all along.
Joel felt his pride take a hit.
“Good. Then we’ll depart tomorrow. Spend the night in my chambers, and we’ll leave together in the morning.”
“Y-…Excuse me?”
Joel blinked in disbelief.
The Crown Prince had spoken so naturally, in such an ordinary tone, that Joel almost missed the part about sleeping together.
“Why would I sleep in Your Highness’s chamber?”
“Well, we may not have conceived a child last time, but that doesn’t change my decision to take responsibility for you. Why else do you think I’m personally getting involved with your father’s case?”
Joel understood the implication.
So what he was really saying was: It’s not even that important of a matter, but I’m handling it myself because I’m interested in you.
Honestly, from an objective standpoint, the incident with Joel’s birth father wasn’t major enough to warrant the Crown Prince’s personal attention.
Lord Bennet’s territory was small and remote.
Events like cult outbreaks in isolated, powerless regions were not unheard of.
Typically, such matters would be handled by the local lord overseeing the area—before reaching the Emperor or the Crown Prince.
In this case, it should’ve been dealt with by the Grey Count—a pot-bellied old noble responsible for managing the region.
“Once I wrap up your father’s case, I’ll return and formally propose to you.”
The Crown Prince reached across the table and clasped Joel’s hands in his, speaking earnestly.
‘Propose?’
Did he just say propose?
Even though I’m not even pregnant?
The Crown Prince must have hit his head harder than they thought.
Pale and stunned, Joel tried to pull his hands away, but the prince only gripped them tighter.
“W-Who said anything about wanting a proposal? I don’t need one!”
“Nonsense. No need to say things you don’t mean. Besides, now that the royal physician confirmed you almost got pregnant with my child, that rumor will be all over the capital. As a gentleman, I must take responsibility. And once again, I apologize for what happened in the forest.”
‘You’re the one who asked the royal physician to check if I was pregnant in the first place!’
Joel thought bitterly.
If he’d just kept quiet, no one would’ve known anything, and this whole mess could’ve passed by quietly.
But thanks to the Crown Prince stirring the pot, the gossip was sure to spread.
They had silenced that physician—Dexter?
Derek? Whatever his name was—but it was only a matter of time.
Joel, stuck in the Count’s mansion for two months, had no idea that the social circles were already abuzz with rumors: the Crown Prince had gone into rut in the forest, Joel had gone searching for him, and returned with torn clothes—alone.
Inside the capital, it was widely accepted as fact that Joel had assaulted the Crown Prince during the latter’s rut.
When the Crown Prince resisted with all his might, Joel had allegedly struck his head with a stone, knocking him unconscious, and then raped him.
If Joel knew that was the rumor going around, he’d probably collapse on the spot, clutching the back of his neck.
“You really don’t have to take responsibility. I– I’m promiscuous, didn’t you know?”
In the end, Joel played the worst card possible.
Of course, telling the man he’d loved unrequitedly for years, “Actually, I’ve slept with other men before, so don’t worry about it,” was humiliating and deeply unfair to himself.
But there was no other way to shake off the Crown Prince, who kept clinging on and insisting on taking responsibility.
Even as he said it, past bitterness rose up inside him, and Joel clenched his fist tightly under the Crown Prince’s hand.
Upon hearing his words, the Crown Prince let out a small laugh and replied,
“You? Promiscuous?”
His tone was full of disbelief.
“You know what kind of rumors were going around when I first entered the Imperial Academy…”
Back then, Joel had become a national sensation for manifesting as a dominant omega.
A group of recessive trait holders who thought Joel was easy spread malicious rumors that he was sleeping around, seducing one alpha after another.
Those lies gained traction thanks to Joel’s fame and quickly spread like wildfire.
Even Robert, who had no ties with any of the capital’s nobles, had heard the rumors — which says it all.
Joel had just claimed himself to be promiscuous, yet he couldn’t hide his resentment and his eyes reddened.
When he lowered his head to hide the tears welling up, the Crown Prince tightened his grip on Joel’s small hand.
“Joel, those were all baseless rumors. You don’t need to take them to heart.”
“How… how can you be so sure?”
“With your personality? If any alpha had used you and tossed you aside, you would’ve split his skull in half or chopped off his you-know-what with an axe.”
‘But since you haven’t killed anyone in the last three years, I’d say nothing like that happened,’ the Crown Prince added, half-joking but with a pointed undertone.
Joel gave a small, crooked smile.
He knew this wasn’t the time to be happy, not when his lies had failed — but hearing that the Crown Prince, of all people, saw through the false rumors and believed in his innocence did make him happy.
So happy, in fact, that he wanted to throw himself into his arms right then and there.
“And even if all those rumors were true, I wouldn’t care. I brought up marriage not just because of what happened in the forest.”
At those unexpected words, Joel immediately looked up.
If it wasn’t out of obligation for what happened, then what reason was there?
He looked at the Crown Prince in confusion, and the man nodded simply.
“That’s right. I’ve developed feelings for you.”
“…No way.”
“You really don’t believe me, do you? What more do I have to do to make you trust how I feel?”
He had personally involved himself in a minor domain’s affairs just because Joel’s biological father was related, and now he was openly declaring his intent to propose.
What more could he do?
The Crown Prince was asking with complete sincerity.
Joel couldn’t hide his shock, faced with the Crown Prince mentioning marriage so seriously.
‘Why now?’
Wasn’t it this same man who had pushed him away when Joel had clung to him with everything he had?
Could it be… that he enjoyed sleeping with Joel that much?
Knowing better than anyone that his inner self could never live up to the Crown Prince’s standards, Joel could only conclude that perhaps the man had taken a liking to his body.
And yet, Joel felt joy. For the past three years, he had desperately dreamed that at the very least, the Crown Prince would be fond of his body.
When he had loved the Crown Prince with all his heart, Joel had thrown away even his pride.
For a brief moment, he felt a powerful temptation to give up his plan to run away and just accept the Crown Prince’s proposal.
* * *
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