* * *
I calmed down from crying, but tears welled up again, and I cried myself to sleep.
In my dream, something was chasing me, and I ran frantically.
At the end, I tripped and fell, waking up in a panic.
When I opened my eyes after waking up, it was dawn.
Yesterday, I cried and wished the world would end, but there was no sign of any apocalypse.
Instead, the sun had risen, leaving me feeling listless. I lay in bed and picked up my phone.
[Taeshin♥> What are you talking about all of a sudden?]
The last message from Taeshin was the one I ignored yesterday. He should have asked again since I ignored his message, but there was no contact all night, probably because he was on a blind date.
“You jerk.”
I threw the phone onto the bed, hugged the blanket, and buried my face.
When did he say he liked me so much?
Now he’s so indifferent to me.
A wave of disappointment washed over me.
He coaxed me into kissing one more time, and I didn’t know then, but Lee Taeshin turned out to be a real jerk.
Devious and unprincipled, anyway!
Thud!
“I can’t forgive this!”
I sprang up from the bed, gritting my teeth.
After sweet-talking me into liking him, he went on a blind date?
I won’t let this slide. Fueled by rage and determination, I prepared to confront Taeshin, but my stomach felt heavy and crampy, so I leaned against the wall, groaning.
I quickly recalled the fundamental reason I had delayed checking.
This wasn’t the time to go and confront Taeshin. There was something much more important.
Yesterday, I was so emotionally unstable that I cried and got angry, pushing this issue to the back of my mind.
Rubbing my stomach gently with my hand, I sat on the sofa.
I used my phone to find a neighborhood far from home and school, where I wouldn’t run into anyone I knew, and checked the time.
I remembered the weekend morning traffic and called a taxi.
“Where are you going?”
“Uh, I have an appointment!”
I ran into my mom while passing through the living room to leave.
Her eyes were sharp with suspicion, probably wondering if I had stayed up all night again, and I felt a pang of guilt for the huge, unspoken mess I had caused.
After giving a vague excuse, I stepped outside and immediately looked around.
My heart pounded with the fear that someone might be watching me.
After anxiously surveying the surroundings near my house, I got into the taxi and headed to a very distant, unfamiliar neighborhood.
Sitting in the back seat, I wiped my face with my hand and took deep breaths.
“40%, 40%.”
I mumbled the statistic I learned from Moon Jinwoo about the non-pregnancy likelihood of dominant traits. I could break through a 0.001% chance in a game, so 40% shouldn’t be impossible.
It was probably just unnecessary fuss. It was definitely an anxious mindset, like hearing symptoms of an incurable disease and convincing myself I had it.
But damn it, I’d never had issues with anything, let alone cheese.
Yet recently, just the thought of cheese made me nauseous, and I hoped fervently that it was a temporary eating disorder or a sudden allergy induced by stress—some absurd cause.
I mentally rehearsed buying a pregnancy test at the pharmacy, making sure to pay in cash. If I used a card and my mom or someone else found out and asked, it would be extremely awkward.
From what I found on the internet, enough time had passed since the incident with Taeshin that if the test showed a reaction, the possibility would be very close to certain.
“Haaa.”
Covering my face with both hands, I let out a long sigh.
Alcohol was truly my nemesis. One excessive drinking session had led to an uncontrollable aftermath.
If I got through this unscathed, I swore never to overdrink again.
If my mom told me not to drink, I would refrain from alcohol and even water, I prayed and vowed to myself, looking up at the sky and the future.
As soon as I got out of the taxi, I walked into the nearest pharmacy.
Facing the friendly pharmacist, I felt burdened to meet their eyes, so I looked away and spoke.
“Uh, a pregnancy test, please….”
Despite planning to speak without wavering, my face flushed as soon as I tried to say it out loud.
With a pounding heart, I bought the pregnancy test in cash without making any mistakes and headed to the restroom of another building.
Using the pregnancy test, hoping desperately for a negative result, felt humiliating.
The waiting time until the result appeared was excruciatingly empty.
Please, please, please… let it be negative!
I clasped my hands together and made a wish.
I promised never to wish for the end of the world again, as long as this turned out okay.
I prayed fervently and opened my eyes.
Seeing the pregnancy test on the toilet tank, I froze, then with trembling hands, I opened the restroom door and ran back to the pharmacy.
“Can I get another one, please?”
“What?”
“Not that one, I want another pregnancy test! Actually, give me one of each type, all of them!”
Contrary to my earlier hesitation and flushed face, I urgently made my request.
Because of the previous test, nothing else mattered.
I bought all the pregnancy tests the pharmacist brought out and returned to the restroom, using them all.
When no more urine came out, I foolishly used the tests until they all simultaneously showed strong lines.
The result was the same as before.
One line, two lines. Two lines.
Oh my god!
My vision went black.
Stumbling, I sat on the toilet lid, covering my mouth with trembling hands. I felt like vomiting.
My heart pounded, and my whole body shook.
It felt like the ground beneath me was collapsing.
What do I do, what do I do, what do I do….
I couldn’t think of anything.
The realization that I was indeed pregnant, despite my hopes, left my mind blank.
Terrified and trembling, I grabbed my phone.
Without thinking, I made a call, and after a longer-than-usual ringing tone, the call connected, and someone answered.
“Hello, Sunwoo?”
A gentle, soft voice called out from the other end. Hearing his tender voice, my quivering lips moved.
“Tae… Taeshin….”
“Yes, Sunwoo. Is something wrong?”
Sensing something unusual, his gentle voice lowered immediately, making my chest tighten as if someone had struck me.
Crying, I covered my mouth with my hand, and Taeshin called out to me more firmly.
“What’s going on? Tell me.”
“I… I… hic, sob, sob, Taeshin!”
“Moon Sunwoo. Where are you right now? Don’t move, I’ll come to you immediately. Got it?”
“Uh-huh, uh-huh… hic.”
Nodding my head to Taeshin’s firm words over the phone, I wiped my tears with the back of my hand.
The tears kept falling, obscuring my vision.
I hung up the phone, got up from the bathroom, and went outside to wait for Taeshin.
I was worried he might not find the place since I hadn’t given him the exact location, so I texted him the nearest sign I could see.
After sending the text, I crouched in a corner of the building, sniffling and holding back tears.
After a while, an unfamiliar car pulled up nearby.
As I rubbed my tear-filled eyes, I saw Taeshin getting out of the driver’s seat.
He looked sharp as always in his beige shirt and dark brown two-piece suit, but it was clear to anyone that he hadn’t come from home.
“Sunwoo, what happened…?”
“You’re coming from a blind date, aren’t you, you bastard!”
Wham!
“Ugh, what are you talking about—”
“You bastard! When did you say you liked me?”
My blood boiled.
I knew for a fact that Taeshin spent his weekends holed up at home reading, so this had to be a blind date.
Plus, he got here faster than it took me to come by taxi. He definitely came from a date.
“Hmph, you bastard!”
“Wait, Sunwoo. It’s not—”
“You jerk! You playboy! You unfaithful…!”
Wham! Wham!
In a fit of rage, I kept hitting Taeshin.
He was flustered and then suddenly pulled me into a tight embrace, rendering me unable to move.
I stopped shouting and started sobbing, and Taeshin exhaled softly, releasing a soothing scent.
“What blind date? Why would I do that? I only think about when Moon Sunwoo will finally respond to me.”
“S-stop lying….”
“It’s true. I’ve been with my family having dinner. We had a family gathering today.”
Taeshin’s pheromones calmed me down, and my turbulent emotions started to settle.
His pheromones were so gentle and warm that I wanted to stay angry, but I started to believe his words.
Eventually, I buried my wet face into his shoulder, sniffling.
“Let’s warm you up first, Sunwoo. You’re freezing.”
Taeshin released me from his embrace, took off his jacket to cover me, and led me to a nearby café.
He sat me down and went to get something to drink.
As I watched Taeshin’s back at the counter, ordering, I sniffled.
Embarrassment crept in after my earlier outburst. I regretted accusing him of a blind date and losing control.
I’m not usually this reckless and mean, but my emotions were all over the place.
I felt like crying again.
* * *
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