* * *
“I’ll try talking to him again.”
“Alright.”
Seokhyeon nodded, a little taken aback by Raon’s sudden shift in mood, though he figured it was nothing serious.
Raon politely excused himself and left the director’s office.
‘Not that I was planning to accept either way……’
Walking down the corridor, Raon muttered to himself.
Maybe before his regression, sure.
But Siwoo now was far too young.
‘What was I doing when I had just turned twenty?’
He could hardly remember anymore—it felt like a lifetime ago.
‘If someone had to turn it down, it should’ve been me.’
Why would he do it?
He’s an Esper—he wouldn’t even be the one taking the hit.
Something inside him began to simmer with irritation.
Raon forced it down and let a smile play on his lips.
“Esper Yoon Siwoo’s designated Pair Guide, Han Raon—identity confirmed.”
The security was especially tight, given the ward.
Only after passing the extra verification was Raon allowed into the hospital room.
Siwoo was sitting on the bed bathed in sunlight, staring blankly out the window.
“Siwoo.”
“Hyung.”
The moment he heard Raon’s voice, Siwoo’s blank expression changed completely.
His once-dull black eyes now sparkled just a little.
Raon cleared his throat and walked over to him.
“How’re you feeling? Sorry I couldn’t come sooner……”
“I’m fine. The military’s just overreacting by making me stay a day.”
“Hmm, really?”
“Yeah.”
Raon eyed him skeptically, but Siwoo really did look fine.
With an S-rank Esper’s recovery rate, healing fully in a day with proper Guiding and treatment wasn’t out of the question.
Still, Raon felt this persistent tightness in his chest.
Maybe it was because the last time he saw Siwoo in the gate, his face had looked like a corpse.
He kept checking on him, even though Siwoo said he was fine.
“Just in case, let’s keep doing Guiding.”
“……Okay.”
When Raon held out his palm, Siwoo quietly reached out his hand.
Raon gripped his hand tightly—it was slightly larger than his own.
Now, whenever Raon offered to guide him, Siwoo responded without hesitation.
No more reluctance.
Raon stared at those clean, pale fingers for a moment before looking up.
“You heard, right? HQ says we need to start insertion-level Guiding.”
“Cough—”
Siwoo started choking, clearly flustered by the blunt statement.
Raon patted his back with his free hand.
“But I heard you said no?”
“Hyung, that’s…”
Siwoo looked flustered, glancing at Raon. Raon only smiled.
He didn’t know why his chest was bubbling like this, but he kept up a casual smile.
He wanted Siwoo to feel comfortable enough to speak freely.
“It’s okay. Just tell me, yeah?”
“……”
As Raon leaned forward during the Guiding, Siwoo’s face flushed red.
He averted his gaze and spoke quietly.
“I just… I heard insertion-level Guiding is hard on the Guide. I didn’t want to overwork you……”
“So it’s not that you didn’t want to?”
“No, it’s not that……”
Siwoo’s face turned a deep red, and his voice shrank with every word.
His whole body seemed to curl in on itself. Raon felt like he was bullying him.
“So you refused because you were worried about me?”
“Yeah.”
“I see. Thanks for telling me.”
Raon smiled gently.
Knowing Siwoo hadn’t refused because he disliked him eased the knot in his chest—just a little.
There are four main stages of Guiding: Emission, Contact, Mucous, and finally Insertion.
The more physical contact a Guide and Esper share, the more efficient the Guiding becomes.
Simply put—Insertion Guiding equals sex.
These days, to protect Guide rights, no one is forced into it unless they consent.
However, with S-rank Espers, there’s some leniency, and pressure can be applied.
Still, the center hadn’t dared to press Raon because he was an S-rank Guide.
And there’s another S-rank Guide besides him—so ultimately, it was entirely up to Raon.
‘I thought it was ridiculous to even consider doing that with a kid…’
Raon was fully aware of the age gap between him and Siwoo.
Before regression, it might’ve been different.
But now, Siwoo had just turned twenty.
They’d already done mucous Guiding—meaning they’d kissed—so in a way, it felt too late to act bashful.
But still, going that far gave him pause.
Especially since it was Siwoo’s first kiss.
If he also had his first time with Raon, wouldn’t that be kind of… pitiful?
But hearing Siwoo say it wasn’t because he didn’t want to made Raon feel strange.
Watching Siwoo’s flushed face turn away stirred something inside him.
He swallowed dryly and spoke again.
“So Siwoo, if I’m okay with it… you don’t dislike the idea, right?”
“Huh?”
Siwoo turned his head in surprise, eyes wide with confusion.
“You said you refused because you were worried about me. But I’m fine. My body’s tough—other Guides might be a concern, but I’m not.”
“But……”
“It’s not like it’s a big deal.”
Raon knew he wasn’t exactly a paragon of chastity.
He hadn’t lived recklessly, but he never attached major meaning to physical relationships.
Especially in a world where Guiding literally saved lives—he hadn’t bottomed before, but if it came down to it, he was willing.
And if it was with Siwoo, even more so.
The only thing holding him back was guilt about Siwoo being so young.
But if Siwoo didn’t hate the idea, was there any real reason to avoid it?
“Hyung… have you done it before?”
“Huh?”
That question hit Raon out of nowhere.
Siwoo’s face had been red with embarrassment, but now it changed—he was blushing for a different reason.
“Is that why you’re being so calm about it? Because you have experience?”
“Ah.”
Raon realized how Siwoo had misunderstood.
In Siwoo’s black eyes, a faint anger sparked.
Before he knew it, Siwoo was glaring at him—his eyes burning with what looked like jealousy.
Raon blinked, stunned.
He had no idea why Siwoo was suddenly so upset.
But he answered anyway.
“No. You’d be my first.”
“……Liar.”
“Really. Even mucous Guiding—I only did that with you.”
“……”
Siwoo’s lips parted slightly in surprise, clearly not expecting that answer.
It wasn’t exactly a lie.
After all, with this body, that really was Raon’s first kiss.
He hadn’t done it with any other Guide.
A fleeting thought passed through his mind—maybe the real Han Raon had experienced something before his Guide abilities awakened—but no, he had manifested as an S-class Guide at a relatively young age, though not as early as Siwoo.
So it had to be his first kiss.
“Really? Is that true?”
“I said it is. Why don’t you believe me?”
“…”
Well, anyone would doubt it, considering how skilled he had seemed.
Siwoo stared at him suspiciously for a moment but eventually had no choice but to accept Raon’s words.
“Anyway, Siwoo, that means you’re okay with this too, right?”
“Huh? Y-yeah…”
And just like that, Siwoo found himself nodding in response to Raon’s question.
Even though the logic—that it was fine since neither of them disliked it—felt a bit forced, Raon looked satisfied with the answer.
Before Siwoo could change his mind, Raon quickly added, “We never know when another irregular gate might appear. So you need to be ready too.”
“…Okay.”
Everyone who had entered the gate—including Raon—had been surprised, but no one had been more shocked than Siwoo himself.
He had used his powers on instinct, thinking maybe he could do it—and the results were beyond imagination.
The higher-ups were likely already scrambling to boost his numbers in order to utilize his ability.
“Then, I’ll see you tonight.”
With a soft smile, Raon let go of Siwoo’s hand and lightly tapped the back of it with his fingers.
Siwoo flinched at the touch.
They were going to be Guiding all night anyway, so this much was probably fine for now.
Raon said goodbye and turned around.
To be honest, Siwoo wasn’t the only person he had come to visit at the military hospital today.
Maybe it had been a bit impulsive.
Raon mused to himself as he walked down the hallway.
But for some reason, he felt no urge to go back on his decision.
Tilting his head, Raon stopped in front of a door when he saw a familiar name.
“Is Guide Lee Hamin in?”
Unlike with Siwoo, Raon hadn’t contacted Hamin in advance to get permission.
According to Seokhyeon, for some reason, Hamin had been turning away all visitors lately.
Raon knocked again and called out his name.
“Guide Lee Hamin?”
This time, there was a faint sound from inside.
Soft footsteps, followed by the slow creak of the door opening.
“Raon… ssi.”
“…!”
Through the crack of the door, Hamin’s face appeared, soaked with tears.
* * *
