* * *
‘It’s completely ruined.’
I almost let out a sigh but held it back.
My stomach churned again, so I closed my eyes for a moment.
No one needed to know that I subtly leaned against Raizen for support.
∗ ∗ ∗
The carriage stopped in front of a café.
From the entrance, the rich aroma of coffee and freshly baked bread mixed with a pleasant sweetness filled the air.
I found it a bit surprising that Raizen had brought me somewhere like this.
As I glanced over the café’s exterior, my eyes landed on the sign.
[Green Apple]
‘Green Apple?’
Something about the name felt familiar… Ah!
It was the café I had seen in the Shailot village pamphlet.
A famous dessert spot—especially known for its apple and strawberry tarts.
To say I wasn’t interested in visiting would be a lie.
If I had the chance, I definitely wanted to come here.
‘But I never had the time, and Raizen isn’t a fan of desserts.’
So, I hadn’t even considered it on our last outing.
After everything that happened, I had completely forgotten about this place.
I never expected to end up here like this.
‘And to be brought here… by Raizen.’
I was happy.
I really was… but at the same time, I felt strangely uneasy.
[Raizen Miel Pantheon / Affection –7.2]
Raizen’s affection for me was still in the negatives.
Maybe it was because a person’s feelings, which are usually uncertain, were quantified into a number—it made it impossible to ignore
I was probably going to be fixated on that number unless it somehow reached 100.
‘As if that would ever happen.’
The thought was so absurd I almost laughed.
Even in a situation like this, I couldn’t let go of a pointless hope.
Sometimes, I wondered if my heart was doing this on purpose.
Because otherwise, why would I keep clinging to something that had no chance of happening?
The truth was, I knew.
I knew that the person who hated me the most… was myself.
“Sei, do you not like it?”
Raizen’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
I had been mindlessly following him, lost in my own head, but at some point, we had already taken our seats at a table.
‘But…’
Why was there no one else here?
“Hey, why is there no one here?”
The café was clearly open, yet aside from Raizen and me, there wasn’t a single other customer.
Given that it was featured in the pamphlet, it should have been a popular spot.
‘No way.’
No, that couldn’t be it. It better not be…
“I rented it out for a bit.”
His calm voice had no right to sound that casual.
“…The whole thing?”
Raizen nodded as if I had just asked something completely obvious.
“O-Oh, I see.”
I tried to understand. No, I did understand.
The duke’s family had money and influence, so instead of worrying about prying ears, it made more sense to just rent the entire place for a while.
‘So this is… how rich people think…’
After repeating that thought to myself a few times, I managed to accept it.
And along with that, I calmed my unnecessarily racing heart.
“Welcome! It’s truly an honor to serve you today.”
A woman with a bright smile approached and handed us a menu.
“Once you’ve decided, please shake this bell.”
Whether she was an employee or the owner, she seemed used to this kind of situation.
She didn’t steal glances at Raizen in awe or fear, nor did she act overly formal.
She simply spoke efficiently and walked away.
‘Hmm…’
Maybe high-ranking nobles renting out entire cafés was more common than I thought.
Raizen opened the menu and placed it in front of me.
“Pick something besides the drink and the strawberry tart.”
Watching him, I suddenly realized something.
Raizen and I… had grown a lot closer.
“Okay…”
I focused on the menu. I skimmed over the options, but the words weren’t really sinking in.
‘Idiot. Why are you getting excited over something like this?’
Even though his affection was still in the –7 range, according to the ancient god, it had started at –144.
The first time I checked, it was –44.
So of course, it made sense that we felt closer now.
There was no reason for my heart to be making such a big deal out of it.
‘Just pick something already.’
I forced myself to focus. I’d get the strawberry tart for dessert, and as for a drink…
‘I guess coffee is out of the question.’
Would they stop me from drinking coffee since I wasn’t an adult yet?
The duke’s household mostly drank tea, so I had practically forgotten coffee existed.
But now that I smelled it, I was craving an iced Americano so badly.
‘Wait, why isn’t iced Americano on the menu?’
I double-checked, but all I saw was espresso.
Seriously?
What was this, Italy?
Even if they did have iced Americano, it would have been weird, but that wasn’t the point.
The point was, I could drink iced Americano without syrup, but I couldn’t handle straight espresso.
“I’ll have the strawberry tart and… milk.”
Just wait until I turn of age. I’ll drink beer, wine, and coffee as much as I want.
With that determination, I handed the menu to Raizen.
He barely glanced at it for three seconds before ringing the bell.
The staff returned immediately.
“May I take your order?”
“Two strawberry tarts and two glasses of milk, please.”
I suddenly noticed something.
Raizen was always extra polite when dealing with outsiders.
Not that I found it particularly impressive or anything… Just saying.
‘Milk? I thought he’d order tea.’
It was a surprising choice, considering his usual preferences.
Then again, bringing me here in the first place was already pretty far from his usual tastes.
‘…Not bad.’
Yeah. Let’s just leave it at that.
Since there was nothing complicated to prepare, the tarts and milk arrived quickly.
The tart had a thick filling, and glossy strawberries were piled generously on top.
Normally, my mouth would have watered just looking at it.
But right now, I just felt disappointed.
‘My stomach still feels off.’
I had felt sick since this morning.
If I wanted medicine, I’d have to ask Mila, which meant the duchess would find out, too.
I didn’t want to worry them, so I had no choice but to endure it.
‘I know I’m being stupid.’
But what else could I do?
I had never experienced being cared for before—I had no idea how to handle it.
If I had still believed this wasn’t my body to begin with, maybe I could have ignored it.
But now… there was too much uncertainty.
‘I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore.’
All I knew was what I had to do right now.
“Thanks for the food, hyung!”
I flashed Raizen a bright smile and stuffed a bite of the strawberry tart into my mouth.
It was ridiculously good. Almost as good as the ones from the duchy.
But with every bite, a dull ache spread through my chest.
The food kept piling up inside me, unable to settle properly.
At some point, I was just drinking milk to help swallow the tart.
Still, it wasn’t for nothing.
Even though it was just one slice, I finished the whole thing.
“Wow, this tart is amazing!”
Realizing I had been too focused on eating, I hurriedly spoke up, making it seem like I was too overwhelmed by the taste to talk earlier.
“Did you like it?”
Raizen smiled softly as he spoke. I nodded eagerly while glancing at his plate.
Surprisingly, a third of it was already gone.
Maybe it was because of the flour and milk, but the stomachache was getting worse.
I clenched the fabric of my clothes under the table, making sure not to show it, and forced out my words.
“Thanks, hyung. Honestly, I wanted to come here, and thanks to you, I finally did.”
At that moment, a wave of nausea surged up, and I barely stopped myself from covering my mouth.
I must have had a really bad case of indigestion.
Should I just slip away to the restroom and act like it’s nothing?
If I throw up, maybe the pain will ease a little.
‘It’s because I like this. That’s why I don’t want to go back just yet.’
Besides, I hadn’t even heard what Raizen had to say yet.
He went out of his way to bring me here and even chose a place that suited my taste.
That probably meant he had something serious to talk about… right?
Or maybe not…?
‘Ah, whatever.’
I barely stopped myself from leaning forward instinctively.
“Hyung, so what was it you wanted to—”
At that moment, Raizen stood up.
I felt him move closer to me.
“…Hyung?”
“Sei.”
Before I could react to the low voice calling my name, my body was lifted into the air.
Raizen had picked me up. Just like that.
‘Wow. This is so freaking embarrassing…’
Technically, there was only about a one-year difference between our physical ages, so the fact that he could carry me like this was utterly humiliating.
I swear, I need to start working out and drinking more milk.
Despite my ridiculous thoughts, I subtly leaned my head against Raizen’s chest.
‘It’s comfortable… and it feels nice…’
His body temperature was lower than the average person’s, which made him feel cool to the touch.
I hadn’t realized it, but I was sweating cold sweat.
‘My body temperature… it feels like it’s gone up just a little bit.’
I’d noticed this for a while now, but being in his arms made it even clearer.
Raizen’s body was slightly warmer than usual, just enough to feel pleasantly cool rather than cold.
“Why did you come along when you’re feeling sick?”
His unusually low voice sounded almost like he was scolding me, and for some reason, that made me feel even worse.
“…You’re the one who asked me to come out…”
I murmured, not even realizing I had spoken aloud.
“If I ask you to go somewhere, will you follow me no matter what?”
I can’t remember what I answered to that.
I just recall smiling like an idiot.
And then Raizen draping his coat over me.
That was the last thing I remembered.
For the first time since arriving in this world, I fell into the deepest, most peaceful sleep.
Somewhere, I thought I could smell the scent of roses.
* * *
