* * *
That night, I had a strange dream.
[■■a.]
[Sei.]
Raizen and my brother appeared before me, calling my name.
The hyungs’s face was drawn with kindness, while Raizen’s expression was as composed as ever.
I reached for Raizen’s hand.
My body moved on its own, as if something had taken control of me.
Then, my brother smiled—while thick, black tears dripped from his eyes.
[Even though we have no shared memories, you’re choosing him? Just because I’m the fake?]
The black tears he shed became a wave, crashing over me.
Desperate to survive, I instinctively reached out and lifted my head.
There, looking down at me, was Raizen.
His crimson eyes held no emotion. His lips, though sealed, curved slightly upward.
But the sun still rose, and time continued to flow.
No matter what happened to me, it always did.
There was no use in sitting around feeling down—it would only put me at a disadvantage.
So, I greeted Mila as usual, let her help me get ready, and prepared for breakfast.
Even while staying at the townhouse, the basic rules of the ducal family remained unchanged.
Unless there were special circumstances, breakfast and dinner were to be eaten together.
By the time I reached the dining room, I was the last to arrive—a rare occurrence.
“Good morning, Sei. Did you sleep well?”
I found myself studying the Duchess’s expression more closely than usual before quickly snapping back to my senses.
“Yes! Good morning!”
I deliberately brightened my tone and made my way to my seat.
The table was set with a simple breakfast: salad, sandwiches, and salmon soup.
“Let’s begin,” Duke Pantheon said, and we lifted our utensils.
The moment I took a spoonful of soup, warmth and richness filled my mouth.
It was a taste I never tired of, yet oddly enough, swallowing it felt difficult today.
I forced myself to swallow, but just that one bite made my stomach feel heavy.
After a few more reluctant spoonfuls, the Duchess’s voice reached my ears.
“We’re leaving this evening. How about taking one last look around the village before we go?”
It was usually my job to answer first in situations like this.
So I hurriedly opened my mouth to respond—
“Yes, Mother.”
—but Raizen beat me to it.
“Raizen? Answering first?”
“Just let me know if you’re going out.”
“Understood.”
Before I could recover from my surprise, Raizen had already responded to Duke Pantheon as well.
‘…What’s going on?’
Something felt off.
It wasn’t just that Raizen was acting out of character.
It was the same strange feeling I’d sensed since stepping into the dining room—something I’d tried to ignore.
‘Everything feels… too normal.’
Just yesterday, something huge had happened at the Manifestation ceremony.
And yet, nothing seemed different today.
Not that I expected a somber mood or everyone walking around with dark expressions.
It just… felt like there was something I wasn’t aware of. Like I was the only one left out.
‘They must’ve talked about something last night…’
Did they have a conversation without me?
But I couldn’t really blame them—I had fallen into such a deep sleep that I’d practically passed out.
‘Maybe they tried to wake me, but I didn’t budge, so they gave up?’
That was probably it.
And this was breakfast, after all—not exactly the time for heavy discussions.
‘…Right?’
My thoughts kept spiraling.
Asking myself questions, answering them on my own.
I wasn’t sure if I was just rationalizing things or wallowing in self-pity.
To shake off the unnecessary thoughts, I squeezed my eyes shut, then popped a bite of salad into my mouth.
The crisp lettuce, coated in tangy lemon dressing, crunched as I chewed.
The food was delicious, but strangely, my stomach felt heavier and heavier.
Bits and pieces of the past few days floated through my mind—
The former Marquis Kreveta, who looked so much like me.
The real Sean, who had seemed like an empty shell.
The fact that Raizen… was my brother.
My heart was already halfway convinced.
The only thing keeping me from fully accepting it was my own defense mechanism.
Because if I let myself believe it, and it turned out to be false, the heartbreak would be unbearable.
Yet here I was, feeling left out.
‘Unbelievable.’
Guilt over taking someone else’s place versus fear of being excluded—what kind of ridiculous inner battle was this?
I never could just deal with one thing at a time.
Even I found myself pathetic.
‘Still… I’m scared.’
This world.
This position.
If this was where I was meant to be—
Thinking that made my heart race with excitement, but at the same time, it terrified me.
I felt like a helpless child who knew nothing.
‘If I fail even here…’
I forced the useless thoughts out of my mind and took a sip of soup.
Just as I mechanically lifted my spoon—
“Sei, do you want to go out for a bit later?”
“Cough…!!”
I almost choked.
If Raizen hadn’t reacted faster than the waiting servants, I might have spat the soup everywhere.
He quickly handed me a glass of water, and I downed it in one go before finally catching my breath.
“Are you okay?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m fine.”
I wiped my mouth with a napkin and took a moment to steady myself.
‘If he wants to go out, I guess I have to go.’
It wasn’t like I had any reason to refuse.
“Alright, let’s go later, hyung.”
With no other option, I gave my answer and returned to finishing my soup.
It was best to empty my bowl.
If I didn’t, people would start worrying about my health—especially the Duke and Duchess, and Mila, who were overly sensitive about it.
‘I’m not a child. I don’t want to give them a reason to fuss over me.’
No matter how much they cared, if I became too much trouble, they’d eventually grow tired of me.
With that thought, I forced myself to finish the salmon soup.
∗ ∗ ∗
“Try the famous Saint’s Bread of Shailot Village!”
“Blessed necklaces for sale! They’ll protect you from accidents and disease!”
Even after everything that happened yesterday, Shailot Village was as lively as ever.
Well, the Manifestation ceremony was over for the year.
Most people were leaving today or tomorrow, which only added to the bustling atmosphere.
‘Prophecies are prophecies. Business is business.’
But there was a clear difference from before.
Now, I was hearing the name of the Shailot Saint and words like “blessing” everywhere.
Peering through the carriage window, I saw quite a few people paying attention to those things.
‘It makes sense. The voice of the gods rang out directly, after all.’
That damn prophecy.
Just thinking about it made me grit my teeth.
Ancient gods who wanted the human world to fall?
They must’ve hated humanity all along.
“Sei, what are you looking at?”
“…!!”
I almost bit my tongue when a face suddenly appeared right next to mine.
I’d been leaning slightly out the window to observe the town when Raizen had done the same—except he wasn’t sitting across from me, but right beside me.
For a moment, our faces were so close they nearly touched.
“Huh? Oh, nothing!”
My face burned as I quickly straightened up, fixing my gaze forward.
“We should’ve just walked like last time.”
“No! I was just curious about the town’s atmosphere. After what happened yesterday, I wanted to see how people were reacting.”
Honestly, I wasn’t feeling well.
If we’d walked, it would’ve been obvious right away.
And then they would’ve sent me straight back to the townhouse to rest.
Raizen wasn’t the type to suggest going out without a reason.
If I turned back now, I might never find out why he wanted to go.
“I see.”
Was it just my imagination, or did he sound oddly pleased?
“Yeah.”
For some reason, I felt small under his gaze.
Maybe because I’d admitted I liked him.
Ever since then, I couldn’t even look him in the eyes properly.
Just being near him made me nervous.
‘Not that I want to do anything with Raizen.’
It was just… a natural reaction to being around someone I liked.
Besides, this was my first time experiencing feelings like this.
I hadn’t realized my first love was my brother until long after he was gone.
Back then, I was just happy to have him around.
I never even thought about it.
So my first love had always been wrapped in longing and regret.
‘I tried so hard to separate Raizen from my brother in my mind…’
But in the end, they were the same person.
‘No, that’s not right.’
Were they really the same?
Their personalities were different.
And most importantly, Raizen had no memory of being my brother.
If he did… he would’ve told me first.
Because my brother was that kind of person.
[Even though we have no shared memories, are you still choosing him? Because I’m not real?]
The voice from my dream suddenly came back to me. I shivered.
‘Of all the dreams to have…’
I should just dismiss it as nonsense.
But I couldn’t.
Real and fake.
As I mulled over those words, Raizen’s head suddenly dropped onto my shoulder.
My heart nearly stopped.
Then, his hand covered mine.
‘You idiot…’
You already held my hand before we left…
He’d always hated physical contact—so why was he acting like this now?
No, I knew why.
It was the divine power.
Even so, my heart was shamelessly happy.
Pathetic.
‘I wish I had never realized it.’
If only I had stayed oblivious until I became an adult and left as planned.
Then, maybe I could’ve treated this like a fond memory.
But there was no turning back now. I would never be able to deny these feelings again.
* * *
